An Unhealthy Attachment
by Kendra Luehr
Summary: The sequel to "An Unhealthy Obsession" - With no memory of her accident, Rachel Dawes turns to the Joker when he claims to know her true identity: Harleen Quinzel. JOKACHEL -Sexual Situations- COMPLETE
1. Harleen Quinzel

**A/N** - Wow, I can't BELIEVE I actually wrote the end of "An Unhealthy Obsession" and the beginning of this in one day...I must've been on something, and whatever it was, I want more of it! hehe But anywhos, I'm really pleased that most of you seemed to be excited about this idea, because I honestly wasn't sure what you guys would think. And to address certain questions and concerns, _no,_ Rachel won't be like an OC, _no,_ this won't follow the original plotline of the Harleen Quinzel character (in fact, they'll hardly be similar at all), _yes,_ Rachel has a completely different face now (for some reason I kinda picture her like a mix of Reese Witherspoon and Brittany Snow, hehe), and _yes,_ I'm excited about writing this for you guys, so I DO plan on finishing it. :) With that said, let the games begin! -inserts Joker laughter here-

**CH 1: Harleen Quinzel**

The streets of London were unbearably bleak that evening, but one woman paid it little mind as she tromped across the cobblestone in her favorite galoshes. When one lived in a habitually rainy city, it was always a good idea to keep a pair stationed directly alongside your apartment door, no matter _how_ hideous or unfashionable they happened to be.

Rolling her mint green eyes up toward the angry gray sky, the woman sighed once she realized it would be another long shift at St. Thomas'. For the past three years now, she'd been the sole caretaker of one Rachel Dawes, but aside from the money, she was truly beginning to tire of treating a comatose burn victim. Rachel's vitals were always promisingly steady, and she spent an hour or two moving the attorney's limbs to keep them from atrophying, but for what purpose? A nameless donor was always sending her a startling amount of money for her services, but who was he, and what could possibly interest him in a former third degree burn victim?

Shaking her head at this thought, the doctor reflected on the day Rachel had been taken under their wing -- a day far rainier than this one, ironically -- and how she'd immediately thought the orderlies mad for bringing in a woman burnt beyond recognition. Rachel's features had been charred and useless, as well as a vast majority of her pale flesh. Despite everyone's skepticism on her likelihood of survival, they'd given her multiple skin graphs, hair plugs, and several other reconstructive surgeries until she was practically as good as new. There was little to no scarring, and Rachel was considered a legend among the employees for being able to survive such a horrendous accident. And yet, in spite of all this, would the former assistant DA ever truly wake up?

With a sigh, the doctor walked up the stone steps to the hospital, her body jolting in surprise the moment a familiar man tapped her on the shoulder. "Jesus, Murray, you _scared_ me!" she hissed.

Rueful, the orderly sheepishly apologized, "I'm really sorry, Dr. Dandridge, but I had to tell you about one of your patients..."

"Rachel Dawes?"

"Yeah" Murray confessed. "I just received word that she opened her eyes about an hour ago... Do you need any help with filling her in on current events, or anything?"

"Current events?" Dr. Dandridge appeared to be genuinely confused. "Murray, I'm a doctor, not an anchorwoman...there's no need to excite Miss Dawes by dropping bomb after bomb of information after she's been under for so long. The after effects could be terrible for her blood pressure..."

"B-but Collette..."

_"Don't_ call me that" she snapped. "You forfeited the right to do so after you cheated on me for Dr. Swanson." Not even waiting for Murray's most likely bumbling response, Collette proudly lifted her chin and entered through the hospital's sliding doors.

--

"Doctor? Oh, thank _God_ you're here!"

"Why, what's happened?" Collette fearfully demanded. "Has the patient had a relapse?"

Laughing bitterly, the orderly held up a bruised arm before confessing, "No, but she sure bit the hell out of me...I don't think she knows who she is, because she didn't respond when I called her Harleen."

_"Harleen?_ No, you must be mistaken...that's Rachel Dawes" Collette corrected.

"Rachel? No, no, that donor of yours said her name's Harleen Quinzel" the orderly insisted, now holding up a note as he pointed to the fine print. "See? Apparently Rachel Dawes was just some alias to protect her true identity."

Collette balked. _"What?_ B-but that doesn't make any sense... I don't even know who the hell Harleen Quinzel is, let alone what she's done to need an alias, so why would she need that sort of protection?"

The orderly shrugged. "I dunno, but you'd better get in there...last time I checked, she was crawling around on her hands and knees like an ape."

Cursing, Collette pushed the orderly out of the way and entered Rachel's room, her eyes widening the moment she spotted her patient peering back at her from underneath her bed.

"Harleen?" she warily called. "Miss Quinzel, could you come out from under there, please?"

Cowering due to being spotted, Rachel stared up at the doctor before hissing, "Wh-who are you, and what have you done to me?"

Collette winced at the scratchiness of her patient's voice, for it was extremely hoarse due to lack of use. Gingerly bending down on her knee, the doctor forced a smile to her lips as she asked, "Do you honestly have no recollection of what happened to you before your accident?"

Rachel gave her a baffled look. "A-_accident?_ I don't know what you mean..."

"Then could you tell me who you are?"

Rachel shook her head with such conviction that Collette was forced to believe her, a frown tugging at her lips as she glanced down at the note the orderly had verified as evidence. Sighing, she wearily revealed, "Well, according to this letter from an anonymous donor, your name is Harleen Quinzel, age twenty-nine, daughter of Fred and Ginger Quinzel. You interned for a while at Arkham Asylum before your accident, but before that you constantly donated your time and money to several charities in Gotham City." Now looking up at Rachel with hope in her eyes, Collette asked, "Does any of this ring a bell for you?"

Rachel slowly shook her head. "No...not at all. I'm not even interested in psychology, so I can't imagine why I would've chosen that field for a profession..."

"I see" Collette mumbled, her hand reaching into her pocket for her flashlight as she asked, "Could you come out from under there, please? I'd like to check your faculties to see if they're functioning properly."

With a pause of severe reluctance, Rachel uneasily crawled out on her hands and knees before sitting atop her bed, her features breaking out into a wince when Collette shined the flashlight right into her blue eyes.

"Follow the light for me, Miss Quinzel."

Obediently doing as she was told, Rachel's eyes followed the flashlight as it strayed from side to side within Collette's grasp. Making a few minor notes on her clipboard, Dr. Dandridge smiled before revealing, "Well everything appears like it's working on the surface, so now all we need to do is run a few tests in the lab and check in with a psychologist."

Not appearing to have registered what she'd just said, Rachel gripped at her hospital gown before asking, "The anonymous doner...do you happen to have any idea who they might be? Perhaps they can tell me more about who I am..."

"The thought's already crossed my mind, but they never leave a forwarding address" Collette admitted. "Someone comes in before the receptionist is on duty, places an unmarked envelope at the front desk, and then leaves before anyone can discover that they were there."

"And nobody ever captured this person on film?"

"On the security camera? Oh yes, but it's always someone wearing a mask...a clown's mask, to be exact" Collette clarified. "Whoever this person is, they're definitely an odd one. I've always wondered why they never came to visit since they're paying us so much money...far more than the required amount, as a matter of fact."

"Oh...I see." Now glancing off to the side, Rachel asked hopefully, "And what about my parents? You briefly mentioned them in the note..."

"Both dead" Collette confessed. "They were caught in the crossfire of some gang rivalry, but I didn't want to tell you this in case it triggered a memory and upset you."

Rachel furrowed her brows as she tried to process this bit of news, but she ended up shaking her head in negation. "I'm, sorry, but I...I don't remember."

Collette gave her knee a gentle pat. "Aww, it's ok, you don't have to worry about it just yet, alright? This is only your first day back to the real world, so if you've ever watched House or ER, you know that these things take time."

"Not really...it needs to happen in less than an hour if they want to fit it in the time slot" Rachel gibed, a wry smile tugging at her lips when she watched Collette give her a look of surprise.

"Ah, a comedian...that's _good!_ Laughter is the world's best medicine, you know."

"So is morphine" Rachel muttered. "Forgive me for sounding like some jaded primadonna, but I don't exactly feel like laughing at the moment."

"Oh, well that's completely understandable...I'm sure you're very confused right now" Collette observed. "But don't lose faith, alright? By the time you regain your memory, you'll look back on this day and _want_ to laugh."

"I sure hope so" Rachel mumbled. Now glancing up at her doctor with shining eyes, she asked, "And what about these tests you need to take? _Please_ tell me I'll be getting a lollipop out of the deal..."

Collette laughed loudly. "Hey, I like you, kid...consider it done." Patting her patient's upperarm, she then turned about and prepared to gather up her medical supplies.

--

"Wow, why the hot maternity dress?"

Giving her brother a dirty look, the very pregnant Miranda Dent Hubbard demanded, "Are _you,_ the prince of unstylish clothing, asking _me_ why I'm dressed like this? At least I have an excuse! When you start carting around a gut with a living fetus, I'll forgive you for wearing that tacky red pantsuit last June!"

"Hey, that was a rental!"

"No excuse...you still wore it" she slyly pointed out. Now rubbing her swollen stomach, she gave a groan before complaining, "And would it _kill_ you to wear socks that match your pants for a change? I can tell from here that those navy blue knee-highs of shame do _not_ go with your black trousers."

"Well, they looked like they matched this morning...it was kinda dark in my room" Harvey sheepishly confessed. Now tweaking his sister's dainty nose, he grinned while teasing her, "And man, it's a good thing I don't have to see your husband too often, 'cause I'm sure he is _so_ whipped...what do you do, keep him on an electric shock collar?"

_"Harvey!"_ Slapping his arm in retaliation, Miranda grinned before returning, "I'll have you know that I keep him on a _very_ short leash...no shock collars, because I don't believe in animal cruelty."

Laughing, Harvey slung an arm around her shoulders and began to escort her toward her shiny new sports car. He'd bought it for her birthday as a surprise, but her husband had actually been far more thrilled about it (despite it being pink) than she was. Miranda had insisted she'd already been given her present the moment she and Harvey had started spending time together, for she felt that they were finally being given a second chance.

Opening the car door for his sister, Harvey grinned at her while asking, "So what're you going to get me while you're out shopping?" When Miranda sent him a dirty look, he teasingly persisted, "Aww, c'mon, I know you very well by now, Mandy, and I _know_ you didn't buy me and Ashleen our wedding present yet."

Miranda smirked. "Ok, so you got me... What would you like? A nice, big box full of 'kiss my ass'?"

Harvey grinned. "Now I'm sure Dusty finds your ass to be just _delectable_ -- he's kissing it all the time, after all -- but I'm afraid that I'm going to have to decline your oh-so-generous offer."

"Stop making fun of my husband, you jerk!" Smirking despite her blushing cheeks, Miranda hooked her seatbelt before confessing, "Alright, so I really _am_ going out on a last minute shopping trip, but that's probably because I just can't_ believe_ you're marrying that snotty reporter, Ashleen Rivers."

Harvey frowned. "Mandy, we've talked about this..."

"Oh, I know, but I can't help it if I think she's a snotty, gap-toothed, plastic-ass bimbo" Miranda grumbled. "I mean, my _God,_ Harvey, if she were the _slightest_ bit like Rachel..."

_"That's enough!"_

Stunned into silence, the blonde gazed ruefully up into Harvey's eyes before shaking her head, her voice quivering with emotion as she whispered, "I'm so sorry, Harvey, I just...I just _really_ miss her. I know it's been three years already and that I should just get over it, but I...I..."

"Shh, I know...I miss her, too" Harvey mumbled, his eyes closing in despair as he leaned forward and embraced his sister. As he listened to the disquieting sound of her sobs, he stroked her hair and couldn't help but wonder if he'd truly gotten over Rachel Dawes, after all.

--

Sucking on her promised lollipop, Rachel impatiently swung her legs back and forth as she continued to wait for Dr. Dandridge to come back with the test results. Her arm currently felt like swiss cheese due to all the poking and prodding, but she figured that the various blood tests would be worth it in the end... Or at least they'd _better_ be since the needles had hurt like hell.

Admiring her handiwork on her nearly obliterated lollipop -- and wondering why it took _so_ damn long to get to the Tootsie Roll center -- Rachel barely even flinched the moment the door slowly opened at her side.

"Am I cured?" she asked, suddenly somewhat disinterested.

There was a long pause, then a giddy voice returned, "Well that depends entirely on _you,_ Miss Quinzel."

Looking up with a start, Rachel nearly choked on her lollipop the moment she spotted the dark figure in the doorway, his greasy hair slightly masking his eyes as his lips curled up into a horrifying smile.

"Aww, come now, Miss Quinzel, please don't tell me you don't remember who I am" he mockingly purred, his gloved finger drawing across his lips as he pressed, "You don't remember the _scars?_ Or better yet, how I _got_ them?"

Rachel swallowed, suddenly wishing that she had a weapon. "N-no, I...I don't..."

"Well now" the figure coolly returned, "I guess we're just going to have to rectify that, now aren't we?"

Before Rachel could even think to argue, he closed the door behind him and eagerly crossed the threshold.

**A/N** - Whew, chapter one's over and done with! Hopefully you guys liked it, because I'm looking forward to bringing Rachel/Harleen's (Rachleen's?) character to life...in my original story (hoping to make it into a book, but we'll see), I'm writing for a character who's lost her memory as well, so this is helping me delve more into that kind of psychological realm. A lot of you asked if Rachel would regain her memory, but why would I give you the answer to that just yet? :-P It'd take away the fun if I told you, right? hehehe I originally wasn't going to include Mr. J in the first chapter, but then I figured, "Eh, why not? Everybody loves Mistah J!" lol

Since I never got to thank my anonymous reviewers for chapter thirteen of "An Unhealthy Obsession", I figured I'd do it right here 'cause I love you all THAT much. :)

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

Sabriel - Omg, are you SERIOUS?? They were going to have Harley Quinn in TDK? In a way I'm happy they didn't, because then there would be far less Jokachel fics, and I wouldn't be writing this, hehehe. I don't remember much of Harley Quinn to be honest, but I DO remember her always going, "Mistah Jaaaaaay!" and calling him "Puddin'", hahaha.

Margot - Aww, well thank you so much! :-D Hopefully I didn't make you wait too long (a whole 24 hours!), hahaha.

Yannina - Aww, well that's ok, don't feel bad about that. :) And a lot of people have told me they like my Rachel, but not the TDK Rachel; I was kind of off and on about her, because sometimes she'd been cool, but then other times she'd be a real you-know-what. As for her looks, that doesn't really matter to me as long as they can act their way out of a paper bag, hahaha.

Jia - Haha, oh yes, Mr. J HAS to be somewhat attached to Rachel for this to work. ;) Er...and so that a gajillion Jokachel fan girls don't come tearing down my door. XD


	2. The Joker

**A/N** - Hurroooo, and welcome to the next demented chapter written by my equally demented mind. :) And bajibba-bajibba, what on EARTH have I done to deserve you guys? Seriously, you're AMAZING! So many nice comments on just the first chapter alone! -hugs- I've also had quite a few readers IM me, and I love talking to you guys about TDK or anything in general, so if you feel like chatting with me, please do so...if you DARE, MWUAHAAAAAA!

And you know what's a good song for Batman, in general? Coldplay's "Viva la Vida"...I never really realized that until I saw CopiPan's vid for it. And now, coincidentally, I can't get it out of my head. XD It's playing right now on my iPod, in fact, haha. But anywhos, I'm babbling...I'll tell you some more pointless stuff at the end. ;)

By the way, have you noticed how (as my stories progress) my chapter titles get less and less creative? Hahaha... -draiiiiined-

**CH 2: The Joker**

_"Get away from me!"_

Giggling, the figure reached out to touch Rachel's cheek, but she bit at his invasive appendages before he could complete his task. Appearing to be momentarily surprised by this, the maniac gave a whoop of a laugh while purring, "My, my, my, you're _far_ feistier than I remember you being...guess all that hospital food's done you a world of good."

"Who _are_ you?" Rachel demanded. "You keep acting like you know who I am, but I don't know you at all..."

"Not know _me?_ Why Harley, I'm _crushed..."_ Giving her a scarred grin, the man flicked out a black and white card before revealing, _"This_ is who I am -- look familiar?"

"A _Joker?"_

He clucked his tongue in disapproval. "No, no, no, not _a_ Joker, _the_ Joker...Good God, what is it with you people and not being able to discern the proper article?"

"Well would you rather we called you El Joke-o?" Rachel snapped, her eyes narrowing as she wondered how it was possible for one man to be so egostistic.

The Joker's eyes almost seemed to light up. "A-ha, your first unfunny joke! I guess we really _are_ meant to do this forever, aren't we?"

"What do you mean?"

"Before you 'died', I prophesized that if you didn't go out in all your blazing glory, that I would finally concede to my fate, so here I am...ready to see what cards I've been dealt next." Grinning wickedly, he sustained, "But I must say that three years is a _very_ long time to wait, beautiful. I've missed our little..._chats."_

Shivering, Rachel tried to ignore the maniac as he ran a gloved finger along her chin, but after a while she found herself shunting from his touch and racing toward the equipment holding her IV bag. Wheeling it around in preparation to use it as a weapon, she narrowed her eyes before warning, "Now I don't know who the hell you think you are, or _why_ you think you know me, but if you touch me again, so help me God, I _will_ shove this thing up your ass!"

The Joker doubled over with mirth, his hands clapping amidst his glee as he gasped out, "My God, I guess I really _have_ missed this... Y'know, if you'd have been this kinky on our oh-so-special little night, you could've avoided this situation entirely!"

Rachel blinked, her mouth agape as she fully processed his salacious words. The possibility of her having actually slept with this man, let alone having had some sort of twisted relationship with him was absolutely _preposterous!_

"Who are you?" she demanded, "And I mean really, this time... The likelihood of my ever associating with a creep like you is next to none, because Dr. Dandridge told me I used to help out with charities and other organizations in Gotham City."

The Joker giggled, his tongue reflexively licking his lips. "Man, you really _are_ gullible, aren't you? I wrote all that down because it would be, er..._rude_ of me to tell the whole world what you're _really_ capable of."

Rachel instinctively loosened her hold on her would-be weapon. "What_?_ Do you mean to tell me that I...?"

"Yes" the Joker smugly interrupted, "you were a bad, _bad_ girl, Miss Quinzel, and I'm here to remind you of that fact."

--

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you _mean_ you're changing the bridesmaids dresses? I thought Ashleen told you she wanted purple!"

Miranda shrugged. "Well yeah, but Dusty happens to like the pink chantilly lace, and I'm inclined to agree with him. It's far more chic and would go much better with the decorations."

Scowling, Harvey mocked, "Oh, _I_ see...were you both prone when you made this decision?"

"Um, _excuse_ me?"

"Did you or did you not happen to have a view of the ceiling while discussing this?"

Positively horrified, Miranda shrieked, _"Harvey Benjamin Dent!_ Why does everything _always_ have to be about sex with you!?"

Harvey grinned. "Well, there _is_ a baby in your stomach, isn't there?"

"Ugh! Consider your speaking priviledges officially revoked!" Miranda snarled, her fingers practically snapping her pencil in two as she re-wrote the order. "You are _such_ a little priss sometimes, you know that? I hope when you and Ashleen walk down the aisle, you both trip!"

Before Harvey could give a most likely scathing retort, a knock sounded at the sliding glass doors that led out to the Dent family pool.

Looking up with a start, Miranda gave a chipper wave while calling, "Bruce, so nice of you to join us! You do know that it's only ten o'clock though, right? You were supposed to swing by around noon..."

He smiled. "Oh, well should I leave and come back later? Because I'd hate to interrupt a good old-fashioned game of family feud."

Blushing, Miranda mumbled several inaudible words as Bruce joined them by the pool, her hair blowing in the summer breeze as she uneasily lifted her flavored water to her lips. When she caught him staring at her behind his sun glasses, she inquired, "Did you bring any ideas for the wedding like we asked? I think Harvey's really worried about the dancing..."

"Hey, I happen to be an excellent dancer!" Harvey defended. "Remember my senior prom? I was on _fye_-uh!"

Miranda rolled her eyes. "Um yeah, probably only because you used to smoke...and sorry, but juvenile dances don't count."

"See what I have to deal with? Talk about a loving sister" Harvey teased, he and Bruce both grinning as Miranda chose to ignore them. "In all seriousness, though, I need your help since you're my best man...should I wear a tie or go without? Should I pick upbeat songs or slow ones? Should I shave or go a' naturale? I swear, there are just _so_ many decisions!"

Bruce smirked. "Well they sound like every day decisions to me...who do you turn to when you need to find matching socks?"

"Apparently no one, 'cause they never match" Miranda complained. "Just the other day I caught him wearing navy blue with black...would you _believe_ that?"

As Bruce distractedly listened to Harvey's defensive retort, he drummed his fingers while wondering if he should just get what he wanted to say off his chest. After all, both Harvey and Miranda could be potentially affected by the news he'd just learned, so he felt it his civil duty to warn them of the dangers at hand. Now clearing his throat, he smiled wryly as the siblings stopped bickering, his hands folding before him as he asked, "Are you two familiar with BBC news?"

Miranda raised an eyebrow. "The British Broadcasting Company? Uuuh, yeah, vaguely... Why? Don't tell me you're moving to England..."

Bruce gave an uneasy laugh, but he shook his head amidst his apprehension. "No, no" he assured her, "not at all...it just seems that they've had a rash of low-scale terrorist attacks for the past few days now."

Harvey frowned. "Well how so? Apparently it wasn't big enough to be nationally televised..."

"Not really, no" Bruce agreed, "but it was big enough to strike fear into the heart of England's national guard. They've been trying to bribe the creep with money, but they should've known he wouldn't accept that."

"Should've _known?"_ Miranda reiterated, confused. "Why would they know this guy, especially if all of this started happening within the past few days?"

Bruce frowned, his jaw tensing as he looked from one friend to the other. "It's because he's already been nationally televised before... England's terrorist is none other than our old friend, the Joker."

Choking on her water, Miranda set down her glass with such force that it shattered to pieces. "My God" she wheezed, "how the hell did he get over there undetected? There's no way he could ever cover up those scars!"

"His cronies had connections with a private airline service -- they flew over about a week ago, but their reasoning is unknown" Bruce confessed. "Look, I'm just as surprised about all of this as you are, but apparently the Joker broke out of Arkham a few weeks ago with the help of some spineless employee. Commissioner Gordon didn't televise this since he feared it would lead to city-wide panic; a completely understandable move on his part, but a very unwise one."

Harvey folded his arms with skepticism. "And you mean to tell me that the Joker just left Gotham behind without causing any problems? Somehow I find that very hard to believe..."

"As do I" Miranda agreed. "As you both know, I had a very brief run-in with the Joker, and he was _not_ the type of man to leave everything behind in perfect order."

Bruce shrugged. "I know, I'm just as baffled by all of this as you are, but I'm only going by what Lucius told me. He could be wrong about the specifics, but I highly doubt it."

"Then...what are we going to do?" Miranda asked, her eyes reflecting her fear as she subconsciously touched her throat. "W-what if...what if he comes _back?"_

Harvey laughed. "Oh, stop being so melodramatic, Mandy. The creep flew off to greener pastures, so I highly doubt he'd come back to Gotham after having been in a haven like London."

Bruce smiled weakly, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. After all, he wasn't so sure that Harvey was right...

--

Rachel laughed at the Joker's accusation, but it came out considerably strangled due to her fear. "If I was such a 'bad' girl back then, why don't I feel the urge to kill any of the doctors?" Narrowing her eyes, she viciously added, "The only person I'm even _remotely_ tempted to kill right now is _you."_

The Joker grinned, his blood-red scars stretching amidst his mirth as he purred, "There, 'atta girl..._that's_ the Harley I remember."

Wincing, Rachel hollered, "You do _not_ remember me! If we truly knew one another, don't you think your being here would've triggered a memory for me by now?"

"Check your upper thigh" the Joker smugly urged. "If I don't really know you, how do you explain my knowledge of your eraser-sized birth mark?"

Far too frightened to lift her hospital gown and affirm his words, Rachel warily released her weapon and looked him in the eye. "You could've easily found that out...I'm sure the doctors keep that sort of thing on file."

"Oh? Then what about the proof I have in my pocket?" the Joker pressed. "Underneath my blazer you'll find the key to your past, but only _I_ can help you find it."

Warily approaching him, Rachel held out her hand while urging, "Give it to me, then."

"No."

_"What!?"_

"You have to prove your worth" the Joker condescendingly explained. "If I were to just _give_ it to you, it would be like rewarding you for breathing."

Positively livid, Rachel abandoned all her prior fears of this man and lunged for his throat, a cry escaping her lips the moment he pinned her arms behind her back and slammed her up against the wall.

"I see you've still got a lot of anger in that beautiful mind of yours...that's good" the Joker purred. Now snaking an arm about her waist, he brought his lips to her ear before revealing, "There's a car waiting for us out front, but you're going to have to cooperate if you ever want me to tell you about your past."

"Let _go_ of me, you creep!" With an elbow to his midsection, Rachel ducked out from beneath his grasp and went racing for the door, her heart pounding as she heard him curse and lunge after her.

Screaming, Rachel saw stars when the Joker grabbed her by the hair and gave it a good yank, a sob escaping her throat the moment he placed a gun against her temple and began dragging her down the hallway.

"Please let me go" Rachel begged, _"please_, I beg of you! I don't know you, and I don't _want_ to know you!"

"Hey!"

Looking up in surprise, the Joker grinned when he spotted Dr. Dandridge down at the end of the hallway, her hands gripping tightly at her clipboard as she began approaching them with long, determined strides. "You let her go!" she ordered, only to flinch when she finally noticed the gun in the maniac's hand.

"Don't come down here!" Rachel sobbed, a scream escaping her throat as her merciless captor squeezed back on the trigger.

Wincing due to the deafening noise, Collette didn't even have time to react before she felt an excruciating pain explode across her middle. With a gasp, she toppled to the tile floor just as she realized what had happened, blood dribbling down her chin in a steady flow as Rachel's screams gradually became a distant memory.

Shakily reaching for the walkie-talkie at her waist, Collette brought the device up to her trembling lips and rasped, "Security...I-I need...security up at floor two immediately. One of my patients has been kidnapped...I-I've been shot...please be sure to come armed."

Dropping the walkie-talkie due to her rapidly failing faculties, Collette squinted to see as she spotted the Joker and Rachel at the far end of the hallway. From what she could discern, Rachel was screaming, and the maniac was...oh God, he was _laughing._ Shuddering at the terrible sound, Collette only had time to see him shoot out a window before the darkness swirled across her eyes.

**A/N** - Blaaah, that sucked and I'm sorry for it. lol I was in a writing funk the past few days, so yeah, this is what happens when that occurs. And I should warn you now that updates will be FAR less frequent since I'll be returning to school the 23rd, so yeah...although your reviews inspire the living crud out of me, it's going to have to take a backseat to essays and all the like. BOOOOO. lol

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

CC - Hahaha, thaaaaanks. :-D I know I've already thanked you via email, but I figured I'd do so again. ;) I'm glad you enjoyed the "kinkaaaay" version of chapter ten, hahaha. Sadly, I think that's the best lemon I've ever written, so that might be hard to surpass. Crud muffins. lol

Rayna - Aww, don't be jealous over me...I'm a nerd. ;) Haha, and YESH, Jokachel IS super sexy, mwuahahaaa. Too bad I'm the only one who's written a lemon for them so far. -squirms- I need my HOTNESS fix!! haha Thank you so much for all your nice compliments! ;0D

Margot - I know, can you believe it? Yet MORE proof that I have no life, hahaha. Well you and me both actually, haha...I barely remember Harley Quinn, thus why Rachel's not going to be some simpering fool. ;)

Harley Quinn - Haha, I know, guess I couldn't resist using her. :-P Hopefully my explanation for what Mr. J's been up to was sufficient enough. ;)

Sabriel - Aww, well thank you so much! :) And no, don't worry, she will NOT be like Harley Quinn...she'll actually have a backbone and kick Mr. J's ass, if need be... Not that she can stand up against a knife too well. ;)

O.Rose - Aww, well thanks! I sure hope so, haha... -nervous-

Kat - Haha, well hopefully I didn't leave you hanging again...I'm getting slow in my "old age"! ;)

Jia - You're very welcome! And thank YOU for reading! ;0) Hopefully the pace I'm going isn't too slow...bleh. lol

Adriana - Wow, really? Thanks! :-D

Ceres - Aw, well thank you very much! :) And hahaha, I actually haven't thought of a name for Miranda's baby...maybe I'll have to. ;)


	3. Blood and Chaos

**A/N** - Good golly, biscuits 'n' gravy! This chapter felt like it took me FOREVER, and you guys probably agree since you're used to me being faster than this, so...er...sorry? heh Oh, and a BIG kudos to Tera Earth who was the ONLY reviewer to get the Fred and Ginger reference! :-P While trying to think up names for Harleen's fake parents, I decided to name them after Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers...lame, right? ;0) Oh, and ANOTHER big kudos to those of you who pointed out that Miranda was drinking while pregnant... Can you BELIEVE that I forgot I'd made her pregnant? Well, I mean I KNEW, but I clearly wasn't thinking. I changed it to "flavored water" to appease everybody, hehehe. :-P

**CH 3: Blood and Chaos**

It was the sound of rowdy laughter that awoke Rachel from her drug-induced sleep, her blue eyes fluttering as she slowly processed the unfamiliarity of her surroundings. From what she could discern, she was currently onboard some underground airline, for when she looked out her tiny plexi-glass window, she discovered that they were flying through a bank of fluffy white clouds.

Now glancing over toward the source of the laughter, Rachel scowled when she spotted several masked goons about two seats away from her. They were all playing some sort of card game, but why they felt the need to shout their winnings was _beyond_ her.

Suddenly feeling the need to make her presence known, Rachel cleared her throat until one of the masked clowns finally looked in her direction.

"Whaddaya want?" he growled.

"To see your boss -- I have a bone to pick with him" she crisply returned. "He had _no_ right to kidnap me whenever I _specifically_ stated that I wished to be left alone, not to mention that he shot and probably killed my doctor."

The thug began to play his air violin in accordance with her words, thus earning a series of explosive laughter from his onlookers.

Clenching her fists to the point that she drew blood, Rachel shot up from her seat before shouting, "This is _not_ funny, you assholes! Just get me your boss and I'll let you return to your stupid card game!"

The gaggle of clowns immediately fell silent, but the evident ringleader seemed none too pleased. Leaping up from his perch, he threw down his cards while growling, "I don't care if you're the Joker's girl or not, bitch, 'cause you definitely need ta be taught a lesson..._c'mere!"_

Ducking away from the thug's grasp, Rachel staggered toward the back of the plane as the goons began warily chatting amongst themselves.

Breathing heavily, Rachel moved to plea for her life when the swish of a parting curtain suddenly sounded from behind her. Judging by the suffocating silence that immediately befell the room, Rachel knew it was none other than her captor, himself.

"Trouble in paradise?" the Joker crooned.

Swallowing, the thug bowed his head like a child about to be scolded, his head hurriedly shaking back and forth as he insisted, "N-no, boss, no...I-I was jus' tryin' a' get 'er ta keep quiet, that's all."

With a grin stretching at his crimson scars, the Joker ambled forward with loud, deliberate strides. "Chuckles, have you ever contemplated the meaning of life?"

Clearly bewildered by this statement, the thug shook his head as his boss placed a hand on his shoulder. "Aw, well that's too bad" the Joker sustained, "'cause it's truly a _fas_-cin-ate-ing subject. Take you, for example...your pitiful life is just _hanging_ in the balance amidst a web of other lives that are intricately woven together. In the end, you're just a thread...a tiny, in-sig-nif-icant little thread that can easily be _cut."_ In accordance with these words, the Joker flicked out his blade and angled it carefully along Chuckles' pulse, the petrified thug trembling as he silently pleaded for his boss to spare him. Unfortunately for Chuckles, the Joker clearly cared little for his vapid pleas, the maniac's eyes seeming to smolder as he purred, "Can't you just _hear_ all those useless lives being cut? Snip... Snip... _Snip..._ Truly music to your ears, wouldn't you say?"

Smiling weakly, Chuckles moved to voice his agreement, but the Joker giddily interrupted, "Isn't it just _exhilarating_ that you never know when _you,_ yourself will be cut from the tapestry of life? You'll be yanked..._torn_ from your lit-tle happy place, only to be substituted by some newer, possibly _more_ pathetic thread to keep the tapestry going. We can't have it unraveling, after all..."

Grinning, the Joker drew the blade across Chuckles' throat, but not hard enough to slice his flesh. "In the end" he rasped, "despite all hate and prejudices, I suppose we really _do_ need one another to function. Man needs peace, and man needs _chaos,_ so each thread helps to deliver just that to this cuh-_ray_-zy, mixed-up world."

Chuckles finally appeared to relax. "Then...I-I'm important, too?"

The Joker's lips twisted into a blood-red smirk, yet his veiled eyes disallowed anyone from reading his true thoughts. _"You, C_huckles?" He giggled. "Somehow, I can see this whole world functioning _juuuust_ fine without _your_ bumbling presence."

In a flash, the Joker drew his arm back and sliced Chuckles' throat open in a sickening burst of scarlet, Rachel and the other goons recoiling as his blood splattered the seats and walls in a macabre portrait of red.

Her mouth agape, Rachel shakily touched her own throat as the Joker threw back his head in a delighted cackle, the blood raining down his chalk-white features only making him appear more ethereal and ghoulish than ever.

"Y-you killed him" she choked out. "Why would you _do_ that? He didn't deserve to die..."

The Joker finally stopped laughing, the bloodlust in his eyes making them glow against his blood-stained skin. "We _all_ deserve to die, Miss Quinzel" he feverishly insisted. Now stalking toward Rachel with a wolfish grin upon his lips, he took her chin in between his fingers before running his crimson-spattered blade along her cheek. "Death" he coolly began, "is a very be-_eaut-_i-ful thing, my dear Harley. Have you ever relished in the sensation of bathing in another man's blood? Have you ever _tasted_ it?"

Trembling, Rachel gazed up into the Joker's eyes with an incurable touch of terror, her arms remaining glued at her sides as she squeaked, "N-no, I...I have not."

"Think _carefully"_ he purred. "Don't you recall a time when you and I rid the streets of Gotham from low, spineless scum? When we'd spill their blood and just _relish_ in their cowardice? How they'd cry and scuh-_ream_ for their lives?"

Shaking, Rachel backed away from him before shouting, "No, no, it's not true, it's _not!_ I could _never_ be like you!"

"Check your back...you'll find several, uh..._scars_ from our little en-coun-ters" the Joker urged, the predatory look on his face causing Rachel to squirm. Something about his mannerisms seemed as if he were actually getting off by all the horrific talk of blood, fear, and mayhem, and this only helped to fuel the rapidly growing nausea in her gut.

"Please" Rachel finally begged, "just _please_ leave me alone..."

Twisting his lips into a pout, the Joker mockingly ridiculed, "Well poo, I sure don't remember you being so much of a kill-joy, but I suppose sleeping for three years does that to a person." Now glancing down with disinterest at Chuckles' corpse, he motioned toward it with his head before ordering, "Dispose of that insignificant _thread,_ will ya, boys? We'll just get a new one to replace his spot in the tapestry..." Turning back to Rachel, he sighed while adding, "Good help is just _so_ hard to find these days, wouldn't you agree?"

Wordlessly watching the Joker retreat back behind his blue curtain, Rachel closed her eyes and tried to will herself to awaken from the nightmare she'd been so mercilessly thrown into.

--

Picking up a tomato and analyzing it for ripeness, Miranda yawned to herself as she placed it inside a plastic bag and began searching for another one. She had to admit that grocery shopping was fairly new to her, because before she married Dusty she'd just hired a maid to do all the 'simple pleasures' of life. By this point her cooking was finally improving, but every once in a while she'd scold herself for having let go of the family help.

As Miranda reached for a particularly red tomato, she caught sight of a flash of royal purple from out of the corner of her eye. Freezing on impulse, the blonde whipped to the right with the hopes of discovering who owned such a _hideous_ ensemble, only to discover... ...absolutely nothing.

_'Great, now I'm having hallucinations'_ Miranda thought, her eyes rolling skyward as she returned back to her tedious task. Just as she did so, she felt a strong hand come down on her petite shoulder, her fist acting before her brain as she whirled around and jabbed her attacker right in the gut.

_"Oof!"_

Her eyes widening, Miranda gave a yelp of surprise before she exclaimed, "Oh, my God, Harvey, I am _so_ sorry! I-I just thought...I mean, I thought you were..."

"Going to take advantage of a crazy pregnant lady?" he finished. "Jesus Christ, Miranda, I think you took out my liver!"

"Oh, stop being such a baby!" Irritably placing her hands on her hips, she narrowed her eyes while demanding, "What are you doing out here, anyway? Did you come to make sure I didn't screw up the ingredients to your _precious_ romantic dinner?"

Harvey smirked. "Well, you _did_ offer to make it for us... In all seriousness, though, I'll admit that I just wanted to check in on you since you seemed real out of it over the phone. Everything alright?"

Forcing a smile to her rosebud lips, Miranda nodded and re-adjusted the purse on her shoulder. "Oh, yeah, I'm just fine...a little tense, that's all."

"I'll say" Harvey complained. "If you weren't such a big target, you'd be able to take down anybody in hand-to-hand combat."

Miranda scowled. "Stop making fun of my gut! I can't help it if I've been a bit paranoid as of late, because mother-to-be hormones apparently make women more keyed-up than usual!"

"You're _sure_ you're ok?"

"Yeah" she mumbled, "I'm very sure...the sooner I get out of this dump, the better off my sanity, _and_ the store's."

Staring at his sister with a twinge of uncertainty, Harvey placed a hand on her shoulder before urging, "Alright then, let's go...and this time I'll make sure to call you a 'dainty cow' instead of a heifer."

Miranda grinned. "When we get back home, you are _so_ dead."

Laughing, the two of them left to pay for the groceries, Miranda finally feeling a sense of calm for the first time since their discussion on the Joker.

--

Splashing cold water in her face, Rachel leaned over the airline sink's bathroom as she tried her damndest to shut out the Joker's horrible laughter. He wasn't currently cackling, but he didn't have to be; the cruel expression of mirth haunted and tortured her conscience to the point that she wondered if he'd been telling her the truth. _Had_ she assisted him in his demented plans of murder and chaos? And if this were the case, why did she feel so hopelessly adverse to his mannerisms?

With a sigh, Rachel glanced up into the mirror before fully concentrating on her individual features. Her eyes were a brilliant azure that lit up like twilight's first star, but they retained a certain sadness that couldn't be deciphered. Her pale, creamy flesh then formed into a pixie-like, delicately-curved nose, well-defined cheek bones, softly arched lips, and the loveliest locks of flaxen that she had ever seen. Was this _truly_ the face of a killer?

Trembling, Rachel turned away from the mirror just as a tremendous jolt squiggled throughout the plane. With a cry, she went toppling backward through the slightly open door, a wince tearing across her features when she cracked her head against the aisle floor.

Groaning, Rachel moved to sit up, but that's when she noticed the Joker's pale face grinning down at her from her uncomfortable position.

With a giggle that chilled her to the very core, he leapt a top one of the seats while exclaiming, "Gotham, we're _hoooome!"_

As the Joker's cronies began whooping and laughing, Rachel felt her soul fill with a tremendous sense of dread, for something about the area's name was beginning to jar her as _eerily_ familiar...

**A/N** - Alllriiighty then...yet another chapter up and out of the way. Is it sick and twisted that I COMPLETELY enjoyed writing that whole tapestry speech? lol I'll admit that Old Norse mythology kinda-sorta inspired that since the Wyrd Sisters (pronounced "weird", for some, dare I say it, WEIRD reason, har har) treat lives like a tapestry and then cut them when they're over. Or...something like that, haha. I seriously don't remember since I took that class (Medieval Brit Lit) a semester ago, which is SUPER sad since it wasn't THAT long ago, but yeah...whatever. I'm off to school in a week! I am sooo excited, yay!

By the way, this is the way I envision **Miranda** (just take out the spaces)- h t t p : / / sweetfaith06.deviantart. c o m /art/Moonlighting-Maddie-Hayes-94533027

And THIS is the way I envision **Harley Quinn in her new costume** (ditto)- h t t p : / / sweetfaith06.deviantart. c o m /art/Revamped-Harley-Quinn-94279729

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

The Queen of Hearts - Aww, well thanks! :-D And hahaha, yeah, I don't plan on going down the "mindless idiot" route...that's no fun. ;0D

Margot - Really? Well I hope you don't fall off the edge of your seat, hehe! Ok, so I clearly just channeled the Joker's lame sense of humor there, but...um...oops? :-P And thank you very much! I've had my creative writing teachers say that to me before (about connecting different plotlines), but I honestly never even noticed. -VERY unobservant- oO lol

Jia - Awww, well thank you SO much! -huggeth- I'm glad that you find my filler chapters entertaining, because I always feel guilty for posting such CRAP, hahaha. And what's worse than one filler chapter is TWO in a row...fortunately I haven't done that. Er...yet. ;0)

Kat - Hahaha, gah, I KNOW! I'm SUCH a moron! Thank you for pointing that out (as well as the nice compliment, hehe) -- after getting a few reviews saying that, I changed it to "flavored water". lol

CC - Pretty boys? Hahaha, me neither...bring on the Mr. J types! ;0) And thank you so much! Your comments make me feel all warm and squishy inside. :-P


	4. The Rebirth

**A/N** - Wow, my subconscious must be constantly riddled with thoughts about TDK, because I have been having THE craziest dreams for the past few days. My first one was kinda "scary", because I was surfing the net and saw a lemon for Bruce/Rachel, and I was like "Ewww, no thanks!", but for some reason I ended up clicking on it anyway. All of a sudden I was Rachel, and I was completely naked (ack!) and standing outside of Wayne Manor. Yeeeah, 'cause _that_ ain't weird... lol Well anywhos, it's raining, so I decide to sneak inside. Fortunately (or unfortunately?) for me, the doors are all open (great sense of security, Alfred!), so I sneak inside what happens to be Bruce's bedroom and he's sleeping naked on his couch. I scream (without waking him up somehow) and dive under his bed, and I see that he's got a friend unpacking in boxer shorts. According to his brief case, his name is Zit Fogleburg. Um...WHAT? Anywhos, Zit ends up discovering me, and Bruce crawls under the bed to get me, and I'm like "Omg, wtf, BACK OFF", and then he dies or something, and I'm like "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, BRUUUUCE!", and I give him a hug, and then...he turns into Mr. J. I only realize it's him, because I pull away and go "Ewww", because there's white face paint all over my cheek. XD And my clothes were back on by this point, so I wasn't cold anymore. lol

My second dream was a lot less weird, but no less deprecating for my insanity. I was waiting in line to sit in the Joker's lap (yes, you heard...er..._read_ right), because apparently he was taking place of Santa Claus in the mall. Anywhos, once I hop in his lap, I start rambling on and on about what I want (and no, you perverts I did NOT say him, bwuahaha), and then I wake up...and I'm giggling. Now THAT was weird. I've never woken up laughing before. lol

But anywhos, I apologize for taking so long with this chapter, but for some reason it was just SO hard to write! Guess I should've mentioned beforehand how TERRIBLE I am at cranking chapters out that involve either love-makin', reunions, or looong, drawn-out stories. So yeah...stuff happens. Hopefully it was worth the wait! :)

**CH 4: The Rebirth**

"Get movin'."

Scowling at the thug over her shoulder, Rachel begrudgingly allowed him to goad her up a flight of stairs as the Joker giddily led the way. They were clearly inside an abandoned apartment complex, but why the goons had chosen such a dilapidated hell-hole to reside in was _beyond_ her.

Finally stopping in front of a room with half its numbers missing from the door, the Joker dramatically gestured toward it before revealing, "This, my dear Miss Quin_zel,_ is your new home."

"Gee, thanks" Rachel grumbled. "Why can't I just live where I did before my accident?"

"Because it's been taken up by new lodgers...you don't think-uh much, _do_ you?" the Joker taunted. With a dramatic flick of the wrist, he pushed the door open while exclaiming, "Tah-daaaaaah! Pretty nice digs for a former crim-in-al, wouldn't you agree, Miss Quinzel?"

Positively speechless, Rachel entered the perfectly refurbished room and gazed around her, her mouth hanging open as she whispered, "It's...it's _beautiful!_ You've even got furniture in here...it's almost like it's never been abandoned!"

"Yeeeeah" the Joker purred, "nice walls, too...buh-_lood _red."

Suddenly freezing at his words, Rachel held herself for support as she promtply turned away from him. Just as she did so, her eyes fell upon a row of trinkets until her gaze zeroed in on a golden object in the far corner. "What's that?" she asked, her curiosity piqued.

"Oh,_ that?"_ the Joker innocently fished. "Hm, funny you should pick up on that, beautiful, 'cause that's the first key to your past." Now motioning for the thug to leave them, the Joker plodded over toward the object and lifted it up to the light.

To Rachel's breathless excitement, she discovered that it was a music box, the ornately trimmed glass shimmering as the Joker pushed back on the gold lid. Cocking her head to the side, Rachel smiled as a soft, whimsical melody began washing over her senses, her eyes closing as she sought to remember a face, a smell..._anything_ that could possibly bring her back in touch with her past.

Suddenly snapping the lid shut, the Joker grinned at her while asking, "Did you have a nice lit-tle _stroll_ down memory lane?"

"No, I...I found nothing" Rachel confessed, her teeth gnawing into her lip as she watched him place the music box back down. "Couldn't I just look at it a while longer?"

Irritated by her wide-eyed inquisitiveness, the Joker took her roughly by the shoulder and sat her down in front of the TV. The horrified look on her face caused him to grin, his serpentine tongue swabbing his lips as he continued to keep her in his firm grip.

"Y-you're hurting me" Rachel hissed, a wince tearing across her features as she struggled within his grasp. "Hey, are you _deaf?_ I said you're _hurting_ me!"

Growling, the Joker slammed her back so hard that her head cracked against the wall, his face now mere inches from her own as he snarled, "This doesn't even _compare_ to the pain you'll be feeling when _I'm_ through with you!"

Quivering, Rachel moved to give a feeble apology, but the Joker had already released her and had a seat in the beat-up chair by the lamp.

Crossing his legs, the Joker leaned back in his seat before purring, "Sooo, I guess you're won-der-ing when I'll tell you about your past, hm?"

Surprised by his sudden change of mood, Rachel warily nodded as she rubbed the tender spot on her head. "Yes" she admitted, "that _would_ be nice, considering how you've taken me to Gotham against my will."

The Joker grinned. "Ooh, do I detect some good old-fashioned _resentment_, Miss Quinzel? I suppose I don't _have_ to tell you what happened..."

Positively livid, Rachel slammed her fist against the arm of the couch amidst her frustration, her eyes ablaze as she shouted, "Look, I don't know who I am, I'm in a strange, frightening place surrounded by strange, frightening goons like _you,_ my body aches, my mind is still cloudy from those damn drugs you gave me, and I'm so scared that I could just curl up in a little ball and cry! Now with that said, would you _please_ just cut the crap and fill me in!?"

Although a tirade like this would've normally sent the Joker rushing for his knives, he found that he could feel nothing but amusement at the mixture of terror and rage on Rachel's face. With his scarred lips curling up into a wide grin, laughter bubbled within his throat until it escalated into a fevered burst of giggles.

Furious at the Joker's reaction, Rachel moved to give another long-winded speech when he suddenly reached into his blazer pocket, his laughter sending a shiver up her spine as he withdrew a crumpled piece of paper. _"Here_ we are" he purred, "just what the doc-tor ordered..."

Snatching it before he could change his mind, Rachel hurriedly unfolded the parchment with trembling fingers. Now lifting it up to the light so that she could discern the writing, she gasped as she read:

_My dearest Harleen,_

_Please don't be frightened or lose heart, because you know that your father and I will always believe in you. After your bank heist with the Joker, Batman kidnapped us and is holding us hostage until you show yourself, so I am sorry to say that this isn't a note inquiring about your health. I obviously can't say too much since he's dictating practically everything I write, but please know that your father and I love you very much._

_Love Always,_

_Mom and Dad_

Trembling, Rachel lowered the note before gazing over at the Joker, her blue eyes glimmering with revulsion as she whispered, "H-how can this be true? I thought your other note said they were killed in a gang crossfire..."

The Joker rolled his eyes. "I know what I _said_, Miss Quinzel, but I happen to say I whole lot of things. There was no need to let that fuh_-oxy _nurse know the truth about Gotham's belov-ed bat."

"Well how did you get this?" Rachel pressed. "This doesn't seem like something I'd willingly share with just anyone..."

The Joker grinned, his tongue laving his lips in an almost lascivious manner as he agreed, "Just anyone, no, but you and I...we had something spe_-cial_. You'd tell me anything since I'd _always _get the joke."

Choosing to ignore the suggestive look he was giving her, Rachel furrowed her brows before asking, "Then if all of this is really true, what did Batman do to my parents? Was I able to rescue them in time?"

The Joker giggled. "Nope-uh, not by a long-shot, beautiful. The Bat had a trap set up in some abandoned warehouse with your parents inside, but what you didn't know was that it was rigged to explode as soon as you'd enter. Long story short, the Bat won."

"Then..._that_ was my accident?"

The Joker nodded. "Yep, you guessed it, kid...and people say blondes aren't smart!" Giggling at his terrible joke, he then leaned back in his seat before sustaining, "I was a few blocks away to make sure everything went off without a hitch, so when I saw the ex-plosion, I was able to call in my men to get you out of there before it was too late-uh."

Feeling a strong sense of gratitude wash over her, Rachel stared back at him in amazement as she realized he really _must_ have a heart underneath all those scars and make-up. "Then you were the one who saved me" Rachel surmised, a smile stretching across her lips despite her desire to cover it. "I must admit that I didn't believe you capable of performing such a good deed, but perhaps I was wrong..."

Curling his lips into a disgusted scowl, the Joker rose to his feet before announcing, "Alriiiighty then, times up beautiful, no more twenty questions -- I don't do well with discussing feelings and other girly crap, so I think I'll just slip on out before you start crying, or something."

"But what about Batman?" Rachel pressed.

"Well what about him? He's a rat who can fly."

"No, no, that's not what I meant" she irritably persisted. "After all you've told me tonight, do you honestly just expect me to lie down and go to sleep? I need to see Batman and straighten things out once and for all."

The Joker smirked. "Uuh, I don't think you wanna do that..."

"Why not?"

"Well for one, you don't have your memory intact...wouldn't wanna make an ass of yourself, hmm?"

Frowning, Rachel spat, "I don't care! I can't just wait for a stupid memory to come when the man who killed my parents is still running free! Now either you help me find him, or I'll go hunt him down myself!"

The Joker giggled. "Ah, Miss Quinzel, you_ never _change, do you? When will you learn that you can't just erase everything with some _mag_-i-cal little visit? The Bat _wants _you to find him, 'cause it's human nature to desire the upperhand. Seeing you so bent out of shape will just bolster his ego, beautiful...it'll make him feel _goood_." Licking his lips, the Joker began to play with his medium-sized switch blade, his pointer fingers supporting either end as he steadily moved it back and forth. As Rachel watched on with a morbid fascination, he grinned down at her while sustaining, "In a world full of people spurred onward by the thought of winning, you'll soon discover that they will do_ an-y-thing _to keep from losing. Take the Bat, for example: he saw how successful we were becoming in our craft, so he decided to put a hitch in our dynamic duo by causing you to lose what you loved most...your _parents._ With you soon out of the way, I was easily defeated and carted off for a de-_light_-ful little vacation at Arkham Asylum." Giggling at the memory, he now trained his predatory eyes upon Rachel's silent form, the actions with his knife ceasing entirely as he revealed, "In the long run, Miss Quinzel, I truly believe that we'll find out who are friends _really_ are. With a helping push from our lit-tle friend disaster, man becomes primal..._panicked,_ and only worried about their own survival. When it's just down to you and your closest confidant, you'd better buh-lieve that your safety isn't the one they're concerned with."

By now Rachel was visibly quivering, her head shaking as she insisted, "But that can't be true, because there are those who are inherently good..."

"Humans are inherently _evil,_ Miss Quinzel, and it would seem that I'm the only one willing to embrace what I truly am." Now turning in order to make his leave, the Joker leered at her over his shoulder before purring, "Pleas-ant dreams, my Harley Quinn...I hate to just leave you after our lit-tle _chat,_ but I've got people to maim, places to destroy. Tah-taaah!"

Watching him egress the apartment with wide eyes, Rachel then glanced over toward the clock on the mantle as she realized what she must do.

--

"Hey, thank God you're finally awake...you had us all worried sick, and far more so than usual."

Collette's lips turned upward into a groggy smile. "Murray, if you're sick, you shouldn't be working...you should know that by now."

Mirroring her smile, the orderly touched her hand as he asked, "Is there anything I can get you? Water? Food? A personal masseuse?"

Chuckling despite the pain, Collette nodded once before agreeing, "Actually yes, there is one thing you can do for me if it's not too much trouble..." When Murry gave his eager assent, she urged, "Harleen Quinzel...tell me where she is. What's happened to her?"

Murray appeared to be rather flustered, for this was obviously a sore spot amongst the entire hospital. Shaking his head, he regrettably confessed, "I-I dunno, but I swear to you that we're doing everything in our power to get her back. We've released a code red kidnapping alert, but so far we've come up completely empty-handed."

"Well what about England's neighboring countries?" Collette pressed. "I was under the impression that her captor wasn't a native..."

Murray sighed. "Look, can we just drop this for now? It's not good for your vitals to be worrying about something you have no control of, so just lie back and get some rest."

_"Rest?_ Murray, I've been out for what feels like _days!_ Why on earth would I need some rest when I was practically hibernating!?"

Sighing, Murray briefly reflected on why this was exactly why he wasn't married, his hand patting her own as he agreed, "Alright fine, I'll go get someone to come in and keep you company, but in the meantime, please just try to _relax."_

As Collette watched him leave, she scowled because she had the distinct feeling that he wasn't coming back. One way or the other, she _would_ find Harleen, and that much she was sure of.

--

Slipping into a black, long-sleeved shirt and pants that she'd found in her closet, Rachel then put on an equally black set of footwear before surveying herself in the mirror.

_'Hm, well that doesn't really scream intimidating'_ she thought, a frown gracing her lips as she continued to gaze back at the small, innocent-looking blonde standing before her. _'I suppose I could use a more convincing disguise...'_

Taking the bottom of her shirt, Rachel ripped it up the front and took out a large strip that ended just beneath her breasts. Folding it over twice, she then cut out two holes for her eyes and placed the band directly over top of them, her nimble fingers tying the bandana-like mask into a knot until it stayed firmly in place.

Although this was a slight improvement, Rachel still felt like something was missing from her ensemble. As she gazed back at her reflection, the Joker's nickname for her suddenly came to mind... Harley Quinn.

She frowned.

Harley _Quinn?_ But what did that even...? Oh!_ Harlequin!_

Grinning over her discovery (not to mention the Joker's great sense of irony), Rachel opened up the mirror in order to sift through the medicine cabinet. Finding liquid black eyeliner and a tube of harlot-red lipstick, she quickly set to work on transforming her 'girl-next-door' look into something far more memorable.

After coloring in her lips with the vibrant red, Rachel took the eyeliner and drew a pattern of four small diamonds in the shape of a larger one by her right eye. Now gazing back at herself with a sense of accomplishment, Rachel couldn't help but grin in triumph. Tonight was the night that Batman would pay for his reprehensible deeds once and for all...

**A/N** - Dun dun DUNNNNNNN Hahaha, Rachel's an ee-diot! Since she only has the Joker's story, I suppose it's only natural that she'd believe him, but she's still a fool. :-P I'm guessing that chapter seven will be the true turning point of the story, because this time around I'm actually PLANNING what I'm writing. Wow! A new record for me! :-D Maybe by the next time I post I'll have some more freaky dreams to share, hehehe.

Oh! By the way, if anyone has a **FACEBOOK**, you should totally join this one hilarious group called "Why so sexy? - I'd Let the Joker Make His "Pencil" Disappear in Me Anyday". lmaoooo You'll find me there, hahaha...took a bit of convincing since I was embarrassed, but I joined. ;0D

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

The Queen of Hearts - LMAO! Hahaha, not at all, because I tend to laugh when he kills someone too...especially if there's a "magical pencil" involved. XD And thanks so much! I hope I can continue to keep Rachel a "new and improved Harley", hehe.

Jia - Hahaha, aww, well thanks! :-D And yeah, poor Chuckles...with a name like that, Mr. J was BOUND to want to put a smile on his face. XD


	5. Date With a Bat

**A/N** - WAHOOOOOO! Words cannot _express_ how happy I am now that I've FINALLY been able to start/nearly finish my TDK parody vid, because I've had the audio files sitting on my laptop just WAITING to be put to good use. I think you guys will really (er...hopefully) like the part where the Joker offers Rachel some sexual favors, hahaha. I love the quote I used. But anywhos, I've also started/nearly finished the trailer for this fic, but don't worry, it doesn't really give away any major spoilers since I have such limited footage to work with. Ha, I'm nervous what you guys will think since I'm no master, but...ick. Anywhos, I think this is the most action-packed chapter I've ever written in my life, but I think that's thanks entirely to my TDK soundtrack. Hot DAWG, I love it...very inspiring. :)

**CH 5: Date With a Bat**

"You heading in, Commissioner?"

"No, I think I'll wait a while longer" Gordon returned, his gaze never leaving the sky as his officer continued to watch him.

"Uh, you're sure? Because Batman hasn't been showing up lately..."

"Yeah, I know" Gordon softly acknowledged, "but at least we know he's out there...there was a time when he insisted he'd be turning in the cape and cowl for good."

Sipping at her coffee, Officer Charlotte Ramsay nodded once before mumbling, "Yeah, I remember you telling me that... Look, I've gotta go, but don't stay up here _too_ late, alright? I think you know by now how much of a worrier Barbara is."

Gordon grinned. "Yeah, but that's what I love about her... Go on home, Ramsay."

As Charlotte re-entered the MCU building, Gordon sighed and stuffed his hands into the pockets of his trench coat. The stars overhead glittered like broken glass scattered across pavement, but he paid it little mind since all he could think about was Gotham's masked vigilante. To realize that they'd nearly lost their protector placed a twinge of fear within Gordon's soul, for without their dark knight, crime lords and other slime balls were sure to try and reclaim their throne. Gordon wasn't entirely sure what had changed Batman's mind in the first place, but he knew he sure wasn't complaining.

As Gordon checked his watch for the time, he couldn't help but stiffen the moment he felt something sharp and cold to the touch press against his neck.

"Where's the Batman?" a soft, surprisingly sweet voice hissed. "And no funny business, either, 'cause I've got a knife to your jugular."

Careful not to move, Gordon warily demanded, "How on earth did you get up here? This is a secured building..."

"Never mind all that" Rachel snapped, "just answer my question and I'll let you go."

Noting her jittery tone and ragged breathing, Gordon allowed a smirk to grace his lips once he realized he had some leverage against his assailant. "First time, huh? You seem kinda nervous."

"W-_what?"_ Considerably taken aback by his observation, Rachel scowled before pressing the blade more securely against the commissioner's throat. "Stop playing mind games with me...all I want to know is where the Batman is so I can speak with him."

"With a _knife?"_ Scoffing, Gordon mockingly apologized, "Sorry, ma'am, but Batman's the type who prefers a polite conversation, not some juvenile stick-up."

"Not according to my past" Rachel snapped, her temper flaring as she gave the commissioner a push that sent him sprawling to his knees. "Your gigantic bat symbol in the sky suggests that you and Batman converse on a regular basis...is this true?"

Still keeping his back to her, Gordon dismissively nodded before demanding, "Yeah, what of it? If you're going to ask if I know his identity, I can full-heartedly assure you that I do not."

"But you're his friend" Rachel decided. Now holding her knife over Gordon's head, she drew her arm back while shouting, _"No_ friend of the Batman deserves to _live!"_

As she brought her arm down, Gordon rolled out of the way and retrieved his pistol from his holster, Rachel giving a cry when he shot her knife out of her hand in a burst of fiery sparks.

Diving for the fallen weapon, Rachel cursed when she felt Gordon grab her by the ankle and pull her toward him. Limbs flailing, the former attorney shrieked when he yanked her arms roughly behind her back, his knee digging into her spine as he slapped a pair of hand cuffs tightly about her wrists.

Breathing heavily, Gordon wiped at his mouth before announcing, "Lady, I'm taking you into custody...anything you say can and _will_ be used against you in a court of law."

Processing all of this information with disbelieving ears, Rachel struggled about on the concrete roof with the hopes of escaping, but this only further succeeded in scratching up her cheek. When she peevishly allowed Gordon to help her back on her feet, she hunched over her shoulders and bitterly followed him back into the building.

--

"Name?"

"Harley Quinn."

Gazing skeptically back at Rachel over his glasses, Gordon sighed before muttering, "Alright, let's try this again. This time when I say name, I want you to answer truthfully, alright?" When Rachel nodded her assent, Gordon folded his hands and asked, _"Name?"_

_"Har_ley _Quinn."_

Frustrated, Gordon slammed his fist down onto the table before running his hand over his face. "Look" he irritably began, "I've already gone through the databases, and there is _no one_ with the name Harley Quinn. Now either you get serious with me, or I'll be forced to keep you here in the slammer overnight."

Rachel frowned. "Wait, you don't have me in your databases? That can't be possible since I work with the Joker..."

_"What?"_ Looking over the sweet, innocent face in front of him with severe doubt, Gordon gave a grunt before returning, "Listen, ma'am, I know there are some psychotic fan girls out there who would _love_ to be the Joker's partner, but..."

"I _am_ his partner!" Rachel irefully interrupted. "Perhaps you're new to the field, because the Joker and I have been ridding the streets of scum for years... Did you at least hear the story about my accident? I have a feeling that it was in the paper for a few days, if not weeks."

Staring back at Rachel in disbelief, Gordon immediately decided that the woman was mad. Of all the years that the Joker had terrorized Gotham, he'd always gone solo. The thought of him having taken a misguided little blonde under his wing was _preposterous!_

Sighing, Gordon raised his hands in an almost placating gesture, but before he could try and convince Rachel that she was quite wrong, a loud series of gunfire sounded from down the hallway.

Astounded, Gordon rose from his chair with a look of panic across his rugged features. Now turning to Rachel with a warning glint in his steely eyes, he pointed a finger at her and growled "You stay here!", his Italian leather shoes slapping against the tile flooring as he bolted out the door.

Stunned by his sudden egression, Rachel rose to her feet just as the gunfire and agonized shouts began to grow louder. Subconsciously touching her throat, the former attorney eased her way toward the door before peering out the tiny pane glass window, her eyes widening when she saw man after man tumble to the floor and writhe amidst their own pools of blood.

"Oh, God..."

Placing a hand over her mouth due to her nausea, Rachel gave a cry when the Joker's face suddenly pressed against the glass.

"Well, hellooooo, beautiful!" he exclaimed, his hand now motioning her away as he urged, "Uuh, couldja step back a bit, please? I kinda wanna blow this thing up..."

Immediately getting his meaning, Rachel backed away from the door just as the Joker placed some type of explosive on the tightly secured bolt, her body jumping in surprise as the door caved in amidst a mini explosion of sparks and debris.

Cackling, the Joker spun in through the now demolished entryway, his head cocking to the side as he remarked, "Well gee, I'll admit I didn't know you had it in ya, kid...getting arrested on your first night back on the job? I'm pretty impressed."

"H-how did you know where to find me?"

The Joker grinned. "C'mon, do ya really think I'm _that_ dumb? I knew you'd go looking for the Bat right after out little _chat-tuh_, so I followed you here. And now that I have, I've gotta thank ya for such a good time, baby, 'cause it's been one _hell_ of an evening!"

Blinking, Rachel moved to further question him when he suddenly lunged for her wrist, a cry of surprise escaping her throat as he wrenched her after him through the doorway.

"Hey, there they are! _Freeze!"_

Cackling, the Joker began whooping amidst his laughter as Gordon and his men opened fire, Rachel screaming as a bullet hit the light over their heads and shattered it down upon them in a shower of glass.

Completely unphased by the startling occurrence, the Joker urged Rachel onward until they were rounding a bend and entering a new hallway. Quickly whipping her head around so that she was glancing over her shoulder, Rachel gasped when she noticed Ramsay aiming directly for the Joker's head.

"No, _don't!"_

Before the Joker could even react, Rachel threw her arms about his waist and wrenched him down to the floor, a grunt escaping his lips just as the deadly bullet smashed into the wall overhead.

Glaring disdainfully at Rachel over his shoulder, the Joker shouted, "Be a tad gentler next time, will ya!? I'm precious cargo!"

Far too frightened to reprimand him for his rudeness, Rachel took the Joker by the arm and pulled him back up to his feet, his slick shoes sliding along the tile as they continued their seemingly futile getaway.

"Units, I repeat, I need all units! Block off all possible means of escape!" Gordon shouted, his hand shakily pocketing his walkie-talkie as he continued to race after his team. By now their help was sure to be on the first floor, but he somehow felt deep within his heart that they weren't going to be of much assistance.

Holding up his revolver, Gordon grinned in triumph when he and his team rounded the bend, for he realized that Rachel and the Joker had finally reached a dead-end. Also seeming to notice this, Rachel turned to her partner with a look of fear in her eyes, but the Joker merely grinned back at her in response. With a loud giggle, he withdrew his pistol and shot the window out in a blast of scintillating shards. Wrapping his arm around Rachel's waist, the Joker then gave a whoop of a laugh before urging her stunned figure forward and leaping with her through the gaping hole.

"NO!!"

Reaching the window far too late, Gordon seized a fistful of his hair before giving an ireful fusillade of curses, his eyes peevishly following after the couple as they ran hand-in-hand toward Rachel's motorcycle, both miraculously unscathed because of the awning that had caught their fall.

Looking up and spotting Gordon in the window they'd just fallen from, Rachel trembled as she hopped onto the motorcycle, latched her arms securely about the Joker's waist, and closed her eyes. She felt him stiffen briefly at the close proximity of their bodies, but he soon relaxed within her grasp and slammed his foot down on the gas pedal.

Keeping her eyes firmly closed, Rachel tightened her grip about the Joker's waist as they steadily increased in speed, the wind violently playing tag with her hair as the motor roared like the beast she so gratefully clung to.

Just when Rachel was finally beginning to grow a little comfortable with her partner, a large, looming shape of silken black rushed overhead and slammed directly into the Joker's midsection.

Screaming, Rachel shielded her face as the motorcycle went careening over onto its side, her body flying straight from the vehicle before landing painfully onto her back. Blinking the blinding stars from her eyes, Rachel shakily pushed herself up by her elbows in order to investigate what had happened. There, barely ten feet away from her was the Joker, a masked vigilante repeatedly slamming him against the pavement as he continued to demand answers.

Moving to assist her partner, Rachel smothered a cry of pain once she discovered that her back was disconcertingly stiff. It wasn't broken, but the fall had definitely jarred her body enough to have hurt her spine. With a malicious sneer over toward the grappling men, Rachel coolly spat, "So is this another lesson of justice from you, Batman? Why don't you leave the Joker alone and fight the one you've _truly_ wronged? The one you've unnecessarily punished?"

Startled by the sudden vocalization, Bruce glanced over to the side and beheld the soft, ovular face of a woman he'd honestly never seen in his life. The tremendous anger behind her blue eyes, however, clearly said otherwise, a wince tearing across her features as she shakily rose to her feet and swayed about.

Still swaying due to her injuries, Rachel disdainfully shouted, "Fight me! Stop being such a goddamn coward and accept your punishment..._fight_ me!"

Confused by her anger and nonsensical words, Bruce allowed the Joker to fall out of his grasp as he focused all of his attention on the ireful blonde. "What do you want from me?" he growled out, his voice harsh and raspy.

"What do I _want?"_ Laughing to the point that she appeared insane, Rachel shook her head before remarking, "My God, you're _unbelievable!_ You killed my parents to end my partnership with the Joker, so the least you could do is stop lying and own up to the fact!"

"What are you talking about? I don't even _know_ you!"

Trying to smother his giggling, the Joker took Bruce's current disposition to his advantage and tossed Rachel his pistol, her reflexes going into play as she dove for the weapon and raised it up so that it was aimed directly at Bruce's heart.

As she did so, her eyes suddenly locked with his, Bruce's blood running cold as a flash of recognition blitzed out across his stony irises. Those eyes...it _couldn't_ be...

_BANG!_

Stunned by the sudden blow, Bruce gave a pained grunt as he toppled backwards and landed on his side, his breathing growing labored as the sensation that he'd been punched in the chest only intensified.

As Rachel warily approached him, her deep blue eyes narrowed considerably amidst her ingrained ire. Helping the Joker back up to his feet, she then righted the motorcycle and returned to her former position, her partner giving a whoop of a laugh before revving up the engine and tearing off across the asphalt.

Groaning, Bruce slowly sat up and rubbed at his sore chest, a sense of dreaded sadness overtaking him as he undeniably found himself thinking of Rachel.

**A/N** - Whew, so how was that? Good, bad, laaame? lol I'm only asking since I feel like I've lost a good portion of my readers, but that's completely understandable...I write too much. :-P And SORRY WERTZY, I know you wanted Harvey in this chapter, but I couldn't fit him in... I PROMISE he'll be in the next chapter, though, because the following couple chapters are very important. Nice little turning points for our love-uh-ly characters. :)

By the way, I HATE trying to write out Mr. J's enunciations, because all I can think of to put after his hard "T" sounds is "tuh", and it often doesn't read right afterwards. Ugh, oh well... I still love him. :)

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

Jia - Aww, well thank you very much! :) Hmmm, you suggest a great idea, but I'm not sure I could pull it off, hahaha.


	6. Making Choices

**A/N** - You know what'd be sooooooo random, but hilarious? I was thinking the other day that it'd be hysterical if this sudden obsession with the Joker spawned a series of TDK-themed weddings, and the groom would dress up as Mistah J, and the bride would be Rachel. lmao I think that'd be SO funny...but kinda hot, if clowns light your fire. :-P Definitely put up that "DO NOT DISTURB" sign on your door, hahaha. And I can't wait til Halloween for a change, because I'm really interested in seeing how many Jokers will be walking around on campus. I've been feeling the need to dress up these past few years (why I like dressing up now I'll never know, because I HATED it as a little girl), but I have no idea who or what I'd be. I wanted to be Leticia Faye from Dark Shadows last year (she was the chick on my avatar, but it's now Jokachel :-D), but I don't know... How many of you are going to be running around as Harley Quinn or Rachel Dawes just so you can be like "Hey! YOU! Kidnap me, please! Play knifey with me!"? Hahaha, ok, I'll shut up now...OH! And the link to my first ever TDK vid is at the end of the chapter. :) Hope you like it!

**CH 6: Making Choices**

When Rachel woke up the next morning, she felt as if her entire body had been hit by a Mac track. Although the aches and pains were minor, she still found that the stiffness in her limbs prevented her from moving as nimbly as she usually did.

Cursing when a particularly sore joint popped, Rachel miserably trodded into the living room before freezing on impulse, her brows drawing together once she spotted the Joker greedily drinking out of her milk carton.

Finally seeming to sense her presence, he grinned a milky grin before mocking, "Morning, _cupcake_...sleep well?"

"What the hell are you doing in my apartment?" Rachel furiously demanded. "You can't just come in here and start rifling through my things!"

"Uuh, actually I can...I gave it to ya, re-mem-berrr?" he lazily drawled. Now shutting the refrigerator door, he moved over to her before flopping down into a neighboring chair, his finger raising toward her as he remarked, "If you were paying attention yesterday evening, you would've noticed that I don't abide by rules...I make my _own._ After all, there are so many _laws_ and strict-uh _rules, _but what do these government Nazis really do for us, hmm?" When Rachel didn't answer right away, he explained matter-of-factly, "They do jack shit, beautiful, 'cause you'd better believe that they're not really looking out for you. In this game of life, everyone is in charge of bettering their _own_ interests, _not_ everyone else's, so why not just beat them to the punch and start living life the way you were meant to? For _yourself._ There are no rules, there _are_ no lim-itsss, and there most _cer_-tain-ly aren't any masked vigilantes in spandex pretending to care about bettering the world."

Although his words were meant to inspire, Rachel couldn't help but hug herself as she processed his message. "I-I don't want to believe that..."

"What, still hung up on the 'all people are inherently good' thing?" Rolling his eyes, the Joker leaned back in his seat before shaking his head, his gloved hands interlocking as he chided, "Harley, Harley, Harley, when will you ever learn? Surely your run-in with the Bat proved that everyone's masquerading behind a mask, but some, like _Batsy,_ are far better at hiding their true selves than others."

"Is that why you wear all that make-up, then?" Rachel blurted. Frantically back-pedaling, she stammered, "I-I mean, I've been wondering why you feel the need to wear all that goop when you could just use a mask..."

"And are you _always_ this curious in the morning, Miss Quinzel, or is this just a new thing for you?" the Joker snapped, a sneer tearing across his scarred lips as he slid his knife out of his pocket. "Any _other_ questions you feel the need to trouble me with?"

Swallowing, Rachel choked out, "Uh, y-yes, actually...why wasn't my name in any of the MCU databases? Commissioner Gordon didn't act as if he knew me..."

The Joker grinned. "Oh, is _that_ all, my little _Har_ley _Quinn?_ Although we were partners in crime, I felt the need to...pro-_tect_ you."

"Protect me?"

"Well yeah, naturally" the Joker returned, an almost mischievous glint coming to his eyes as he licked his lips. "I needed to cover all my bases, because if we _both_ were caught by the illustrious _co-_missioner and his team, all of our operations would've been completely pointless. No" he argued, wagging his finger, "I _needed_ to make sure that one of us would always be around to play our lit-tle games. What would be the fun of us _both_ going out in blazes of glory?"

"But Batman...how did he find out about me if no one else did?" Rachel pressed. "And if he _did_ know about me, why did he act as if he'd never seen me before?"

The Joker giggled. "Boy, you really _are_ full of questions this morning, aren't you?" Running the tip of his blade along the arm of the chair, he crossed his legs before sustaining, "The Bat didn't recognize you because you've always worn a dis-_guise,_ Miss Quinzel. You'd wear make-up...like _me!_...and a fuh-oxy little suit that did your figure _quite_ a bit of justice."

"A disguise?" Her eyes widening, Rachel demanded, "And where is this outfit now? Perhaps it could trigger a memory..."

Smirking, the Joker gibed, "Well I buh-lieve it's at the dry cleaners...they're giving criminals a twenty-five percent discount because of all our brrr-_il-_liant work, ya know."

Rachel frowned. "My God, are you _ever_ serious? Although you love to be Mr. Funny Man, I really _do_ mean it when I say I think the catsuit could help trigger something for me, so do you have it or not?"

"Oh, I have it" the Joker assured her, "but I doubt it'll trigger a memory since I had to get a new one made for you after your little ac-ci-dent. Apparently spandex isn't flame resistant...who knew?"

Rachel grunted, a distinct sinking feeling filling her gut as she miserably sat down in the seat across from him. "If you can't give me proof" she warily began, "can you at least tell me what kind of games we used to play?"

The Joker grinned back at her malevolently. _"Now_ we're talkin'..."

--

"Heey, there's the sugar in my coffee!" Harvey tipsily gibed, a grin suffusing his features when his fiancee finally entered the dining hall. Spotting Miranda coming in close behind, he eagerly added, "Oh! And there's the _cream!"_

"And what am I, chopped liver?" Bruce joked. Now glancing down at the list he'd been given, he smiled before revealing, "Welp, that looks like just about everyone...should we start eating?"

"What do you _mean,_ should we start? I've been helping myself this entire time, especially with the liquor" Harvey returned, grinning at the look on Bruce's face as he assured him, "Nah, don't worry, I didn't. Ashleen would kill me if she found out I didn't wait for her, 'cause this _is_ our dress rehearsal dinner, after all."

Bruce smiled, but he was noticeably distracted. Although he wanted to be there for his friends on their special occasion, his thoughts couldn't help but drift off toward the blonde he'd met yesterday evening. Despite her fiery hostility, there had been a certain sweetness about her face...a certain _humanity_ in her eyes.

Re-adjusting the cuffs of his dress shirt, Bruce smiled as Harvey's fiancee gaily approached them. "Hello, Ashleen" he warmly greeted. "I trust that you're ready to get hitched tomorrow?"

The redhead immediately stopped smiling, her hazel eyes narrowing as she snapped, "That term is _far_ too 'hill billy' for my taste, Mr. Wayne...couldn't you be more proper and ask if I'm ready to get _married?"_

Ignoring the annoyed look Bruce was sending Ashleen, Harvey slung an arm across her shoulders before slurring, "Awww, c'mon, honey, he means well...he was just joking, y'know."

"Indeed? Well I didn't find it very funny" Ashleen remarked, her gaze scrutinizing Bruce as if he were an insect under a microscope. Shrugging her way out of Harvey's drunken grasp, she added, "Oh well, at least he makes a nice best man...anyone less fortunate-looking wouldn't have suited me at all, becausee I like to maintain the appearance that I always converse with only the most attractive people of Gotham."

Miranda and her husband, Dusty were listening to all of this in disdain, the blonde's brows furrowing together as she hissed, "Do you _hear_ that twit? I can't believe I'll be forced to accept her as part of my family in less than twenty-four hours...I'm telling you, Dusty, I think that after Rachel died, Harvey basically gave up all of his standards."

Dusty rolled his eyes. "Well either that, or he has a sick fetish for snobby reporters...who died and made her queen, anyway? She's even mistreating Bruce, for God's sake, and the last thing I heard, only people with a death wish do _that."_

"Well if she _does_ have a death wish, I'll be more than happy to give it to her" Miranda grumbled, her eyes straying wistfully over toward the booze that the servants were now handing out. "Good _God,_ what I wouldn't give to have a little bit of wine...it'd definitely take the edge off of Ashleen's grating voice."

"What, and your voice is like an _angel's?"_ Dusty teased.

When Miranda moved to hit him, Harvey suddenly came over to the slightly disconcerted pair, a sinful sparkle coming to his eye as he asked, "Heeey, Mandy, wanna show everybody how to break it down Dent style? I can get the DJ to play "Boogie Shoes"..."

Miranda balked. "Oh my God, are you _drunk?_ You _know_ I don't dance in front of an audience, no matter _how_ much I love KC and the Sunshine Band!"

"Awww, c'moooon..."

"Yep" Dusty decided, "he's definitely smashed, which is why I propose that you dance so I can enjoy you both making complete asses of yourself."

Scowling, Miranda opened her mouth to give a cold retort when Harvey suddenly jumped up on a chair, a grin suffusing his features as he turned towards the DJ and shouted, "BOOGIE SHOES, PLEASE!!"

Completely bewildered, Miranda blushed when the brass introduction to the disco tune began to play, her head shaking wildly back and forth when Harvey motioned for her to join him on the dance floor.

"Ooh, no, I _told_ you I don't dance...I'm pregnant, for God's sake!" she warned, only to give a cry when Harvey lunged forward and pulled her out onto the nicely lacquered flooring.

Doing a step-ball-change, Harvey spun around before dizzily going into the splits, their audience giving a delighted cry when he popped back up and performed a surprisingly perfect handstand. Everyone, that is, except Ashleen...

Upon noticing this, Miranda grinned wickedly before deciding that she would make her future sister-in-law's dinner just a _little_ more miserable, her eyes sparkling with vengeance as she began grape-vining into a cheated cartwheel.

"Mandy, you're wearing a _dress!"_ Dusty reminded her, only to laugh at the horrified look on her face.

"Do you honestly expect your wife to know the difference between a dinner rehearsal and a _strip tease act?"_ Ashleen grumbled, her arms folding as she glared at the merriment going on before them. "He should've asked_ me_ to dance, not his feather-brained sister."

"Well unlike you, Mandy actually knows how to have _fun"_ Dusty irritably shot back.

Before Ashleen could give a cold-blooded retort, Bruce came in between the two of them while apologizing, "Hey, I'm really sorry, but I've got to get going...big meeting tomorrow morning, and I don't want to end up sleeping in and arriving late. Please give my regards to Harvey."

"Oh, but you'll be here for the wedding, right?"

Bruce nodded. "Oh yes, of course, you know I wouldn't miss it...goodnight, you two." Turning and egressing the packed room with a sigh, he inwardly scolded himself for being such a coward. It seemed that everything in that room led him to think of Rachel -- the dancing, the merriment...God, even _Boogie Shoes_ -- so it was no true surprise when he found himself filled with the suffocating urge to leave. The only curious thing was this: why was he feeling so low after three whole years, and _why_ did he suddenly feel as if his wounds had been freshly re-opened?

Sighing, Bruce decided that he'd most likely never know the true answer, his hands jamming into his pockets as he headed despondently for his vehicle.

--

"Why Harvey Dent?" Rachel asked, her eyes never leaving the TV as the oddly familiar man continued to flash across the screen. "I don't see how messing with this guy could possibly benefit our games..."

The Joker grinned. "Dent is Gotham's white knight, Miss Quinzel, and for whatever reason, these people look up to him like a god. When you take a powerful figure like God out of an equation, people begin to panic...they lose _hope,_ and then, one by one, they all start to realize that their lives are completely meaningless."

Rachel flinched. "E-even us?"

The Joker eyed her curiously, only to break out into a fit of giggles. "What does it matter, beautiful? Dent is the key to all peace in Gotham, so without their lit-tle white knight on the chess board, all hell will break loose. They look up to him to keep order in place...to pre-vent _chaos,_ so with a helping little push of disaster, we can help the masses understand that they're not invincible."

"Yeah, well what is?" Rachel pressed. "When you think about it, _nothing's_ unstoppable."

"Uh-uh, not true" the Joker argued, his finger wagging back and forth as he shook his head. "Hate happens to be an unstoppable and _pow-er-ful_ emotion, so if I can awaken that black seed within Dent's heart, I can easily revert Gotham's white knight to the darkness."

Rachel frowned. "Well what about love? If what you say about hate is true, then it's counterpart should be just as strong."

_"Love?"_ The Joker scoffed and shook his head. "Love is an addiction, Miss Quinzel, a _fever..._it has no true substance like hatred, because hatred is a pure, unadulterated emotion. There _is_ no addiction, nor any ri-_dic-_u-lous little attachments, because you're able to cut all ties with the world and just live for yourself. The only thing left for you to decide, Miss Quinzel, is what side _you_ lie on."

Biting her lip, Rachel closed her eyes as it suddenly occurred to her what she must do. Although she didn't quite agree with what the Joker said, he was her only hope in finding her true identity, and because of this she knew she needed to trust him. With a reluctant nod of the head, she finally agreed, "Alright, I-I'll do it...I'll help you."

Flicking his tongue across his lips like a serpent, the Joker grinned before purring, _"Goood_...let's get you suited up."

**A/N** - Now before you say that a pregnant lady can't perform cartwheels, just hear me out...I wrote that she did a "cheated cartwheel", which is one of those fake ones where you put your hands on the ground and just kinda hop, hahaha. And yeah, sorry for the filler chapter, but I promise the next one is when all the "action" takes place. I'm looking forward to writing it, but I doubt it'll be up super soon since I'm distracted. Today was moving in day for college (WAHOO!), so my roomie and I are kinda chilling out. :) On the plus side, my trailer for this fic is nearly finished, so YAY!

Jia - Aww, well thank you very much! :) I'm so glad I gave you a moment you've been waiting for, haha...hopefully this chapter didn't detract from that. ;0)

LINK to my Dark Knight Parody vid (**_please rate and comment! -take the spaces out of the link-)_** - h t t p : / / www . /watch?vCHXX6tVmKjM


	7. Something Borrowed, Someone Blue

**A/N** - Wow, I am SOOOO sorry for dropping off the face of the earth like this, but...yeah. College has got me workin', workin', workin', but at least I've got a three day weekend now. :-D I'll explain the title of this chapter at the end of the chapter, as well as tell you about my new TDK vids and drawing. :) Anywhos, I also had several more Joker dreams since then, but I can't remember any of them. XD I know they were bizarre, though... lol

**CH 7: Something Borrowed, Someone Blue**

The next morning was the moment that all of Gotham had been waiting for. Harvey Dent was finally set to wed the voluptuous Ashleen Rivers, and the city's finest had dropped all other obligations to make sure they could attend. The GCPD were currently lining the streets to prevent any unnecessary ruckus, and on the inside of the old, ornately refurbished church were rows upon rows of pastel-colored flowers (each had been hand-picked and strewn amidst Ashleen's watchful supervision, of course).

All that was needed now was the lady of the hour, herself, the entire building falling into a reverent silence when the veiled vision of white made her grand appearance. A pause was audibly noted before the organist began playing the processional, Harvey smiling his heart-breaker smile as he watched his soon to be wife walking -- no, _floating_ -- towards him.

When Ashleen passed Dusty and Miranda, the blonde couldn't help but roll her lovely eyes. She'd had half the mind to wear white just to spite the bride, but her husband had thankfully intervened and made her see reason. Taking his hand in hers, Miranda smiled brightly up at Dusty as she subconsciously rubbed her swollen belly, her thoughts suddenly turning warm as she realized that everything was going to be alright. Bitchy sister-in-law or not, she was going to have a beautiful baby girl soon, and as long as Dusty never left her side, she would finally have what she'd always dreamed of.

The moment Ashleen reached the altar, a loud, frightfully piercing scream split through the air as a series of gun shots rang throughout the narthex. Clutching at Dusty's arm, Miranda whirled around just in time to see the Joker kick his way through the double doors, Rachel and five of his other masked goons following close behind.

"Oh, my God" she whispered, her face growing deathly pale, "it's _him..."_

Comfortingly placing his hand over hers, Dusty narrowed his eyes as the Joker cruelly stared each guest down, his serpentine tongue gliding across his lips as he pointed his firearm straight ahead of him.

"Harvey, Harvey, Harvey" the Joker chided, "why didn't you invite me to this oh-so-buh-_less-_ed occasion, hm? I thought we were _far_ better friends than that."

Harvey's jaw visibly tightened. Pushing Ashleen protectively behind him, he growled, "You've got a _whole_ lot of nerve showing your ugly face here, Joker -- give me one good reason why I shouldn't have security put a bullet through your thick skull!"

"One good reason, hm?" Giggling, the Joker mockingly held his arms up in surrender before asking, "Well, they're all either dead or working for me...that good enough for ya?"

His eyes narrowing, Harvey grimaced when four of the GCPD entered the vicinity and flanked the Joker's sides, their guns each simultaneously drawing as a hushed gasp arose within the crowd.

As the Joker took several slow and deliberate steps down the aisle, Rachel couldn't help but allow her focus to fall upon the bewildered groom before them. There was something so sweet and so _familiar_ about his face, and yet she couldn't quite put her finger on why that was.

"Where is Mir-an-duh Dent?"

Startled out of her reverie, Rachel uneasily watched on as the Joker scanned his stunned audience with his shark-like eyes, a grin stretching his scarred lips as he purred, "Oooh, _waaaait..._she married that Dusty Cupboard guy, so I stand corrected. Where...is...Mir-an-duh...Dent..._Cupboard?"_

Flinching, Miranda began to step forward, but Dusty frantically intervened. "No, you can't" he hissed. "If you go, that madman will _kill_ you!"

"I have to" she whispered forcefully back. "If I don't go with him, he might hurt Harvey..."

As if the Joker were reading her mind, he aimed his firearm directly between the DA's eyes, a cold cackle escaping his lips as he snarled, "I won't ask again... Where. Is. Miranda. _Hubbard!?"_

Biting her lip, Rachel felt her hands beginning to shake as she steadied her pistol, her eyes flicking nervously from the Joker to the crowd as she felt bile rise at the back of her throat. She couldn't quite ascertain why her partner's request was affecting her so greatly, but something about seeing the panicked look on Harvey's face deeply pained her.

As she was contemplating this, a proud, beautiful blonde woman suddenly stepped forward, her violet eyes narrowing as she snapped, "Alright, that's enough...I'm here, so leave my brother alone."

Harvey winced. "Mandy, _no..."_

Grinning, the Joker slowly withdrew his firearm before sauntering toward her, his eyes scruntinizing her well-dressed form as he circled her like a predator on the prowl. "You look-uh..._different"_ he remarked, a sneer tugging at his lips as he drew uncomfortably close to her face.

Surprisingly unphased, Miranda squared her shoulders and proudly raised her chin, her gaze remaining straight ahead as she snottily returned, "Brilliant deduction, Clown Boy. In case you didn't notice the fact that I look like I've swallowed a beach ball, I'm eight months pregnant."

As the Joker threw his head back in a delighted cackle, Miranda instantly wished that she'd just kept her mouth shut. Perhaps the maternal hormones had given her far more courage than she usually had, but whatever it was, she knew it was sure to get her killed if she didn't stop.

Wincing when the Joker seized her by the chin, Miranda felt her breath catch in her throat as he flicked his knife against her lips.

"I see that the Dent stubborness runs through your veins" he purred, a grotesque grin stretching his features as he ran the blade along her chin. "Un-for-tun-ate-ly for _you,_ I'm about to, uh...perform a human ex-per-i-ment."

Far too frightened to ask what the Joker meant, Miranda fearfully watched on as he turned to Harvey and revealed, "I'll be, uh...taking your sister now, if you don't mind. But don't worry" he urged, grinning broadly, "I'll fill you in on her con-dition on the news at noon-uh."

Clenching his fists, Harvey moved to storm toward the pair, but the Joker giddily withdrew a detonator before chiding, "Ah, ah, _aah,_ I wouldn't do that if I were you, Mr. DA. Every pew has a nice lit-tle _bomb_ trapped underneath, so unless you wanna be responsible for everyone's, uh...untimely de-_mise,_ I'd suggest you let me do my job."

Harvey ceased his movements in defeat, his eyes meeting with Dusty's vengeful gaze as the Joker began to drag Miranda's struggling form down the aisle.

As Rachel followed reluctantly behind, her eyes met with Harvey's one last time before she miserably turned and fastened the double doors.

--

When Bruce finally arrived at the church, he gave a start upon noting all the police cars and sobbing wedding guests. Abandoning his fancy car, the millionaire's eyes narrowed as he spotted a very distressed Dusty and Harvey by the front doors. Ashleen was in tears, but for what reason, he suddenly found that he didn't wish to know.

"Harvey?" he called, immediately gaining the DA's attention, "Harvey, I'm so sorry I'm late...what's going on here?"

Pale and red-eyed, Harvey miserably choked out, "He's got Miranda, Bruce. That sick son of a bitch has my sister..."

_"Who_ has your sister, Harvey?"

"The Joker."

Flinching in astonishment, Bruce gritted his teeth as this news sent him into a fit of rage. Wasn't it enough that the Joker had taken away Harvey's Rachel -- hell, _his_ Rachel -- and all the happiness that the DA had ever known? If anything happened to Miranda, Bruce earnestly believed that Harvey would never be able to fully recover his true self. Bowing his head, he uneasily asked, "What's being done to find her?"

"Not a damn thing" Harvey snarled. "I mean, sure, Gordon and his men are scoping out the city, but they're not doing a good enough job. The Joker said he'd broadcast a message in about half an hour, so until then I'm afraid we'll know nothing."

Bruce scowled upon hearing this news, his eyes now cutting over to Ashlen as she sobbed, "Isn't it just _awful,_ Mr. Wayne? That stupid clown ruined my _wedding!"_

Choosing to ignore this selfish remark, Bruce turned back to Harvey before urging, "If there's ever anything you need -- _anything_ at all -- please don't hesitate to ask."

Harvey gave him a tired smile as thanks, but it never quite reached his eyes.

--

_"The following footage has been sent to GCN about a half hour ago by the elusive Joker -- we warn you now that the content is extremely disturbing, so please view this story with caution."_

Tensing, Harvey slowly turned up the volume to his TV as Dusty sat anxiously at his side, both men scooting towards the edge of their seats as the live feed switched over to an amateur recording. With a crackle, the snowy picture zoomed in to reveal a poorly made-up face, the Joker's grotesque grin filling up the entire screen as an explosion of laughter escaped his lips. "Hel-_looo,_ la-dies and gen-tle-men, and thank you for tuning in for my most recent debut." He grinned. "Or should I say...Mir-an-duh _Hubbard's_ debut?"

The camera shook with the Joker's laughter as he turned and focused on Miranda's peeved face, the gag in her mouth bouncing about as she tried her best to give him a piece of her mind.

Giggling, the Joker placed a hand to his ear before cooing, "What was that? You think I'm a _handsome_ devil? Oooh, you _naughty_ little vixen, you're _married!"_

Snarling into the cloth gagging her mouth, Miranda wriggled about in her restraints as her captor approached her, her face shunting from his touch as he brought a gloved hand to her chin.

"Aww, shh-shh, we need you to smile for the camera, Mrs. Hubbard...everyone wants to see that be-_eau-_ti-ful smile" the Joker purred, his fingers removing the gag before forcing her lips up into a brummagem grin. Giggling at the abundant hatred in her eyes, he urged, "Now that you're free to talk, why don't you tell the love-uh-ly viewers your name, hm?"

_"Burn in Hell!"_

Bursting into a fit of giggles, the Joker remarked, "Well gee, that's such a lovely name...why don't you give us your _other_ one?"

When her captor flicked out his blade, Miranda felt the malice die upon her lips as she bowed her head in defeat. "I'm...I'm Miranda Hubbard" she whispered.

To her surprise, the Joker snapped, "No, no, no, not _that_ other name..._that_ other name." Gesturing to her stomach for the much needed clarification, he grinned at the horror that danced across the blonde's violet eyes as she finally comprehended his meaning.

Glancing down at her protruding middle, Miranda felt tears burning along her lashes as she testily returned, "I-I don't think I'm at liberty to tell you..."

The Joker gave her a mocking pout. "Oh, but I think you _are_, my lit-tle beauty quh-_ueen._"

"No, I'm _not."_

_"Yes,_ you _are!"_ the Joker thundered, his hand curling about her windpipe with a crushing force that left her clawing at the invasive appendage.

Gasping for breath, Miranda pitifully managed to choke out, "Rachel...h-her name is..._Rachel..."_

With a look of scornful recognition, the Joker released her throat and squatted down on his haunches. "Aww, well isn't that suh-_weet?_ You named your lit-tle baby after your _dear_ old fuh-riend-uh. I'm sure big brother Dent is _sooo_ proud."

Harvey flinched as these words reached his ears, his hands tightening into fists as his fury began to build. It was bad enough to publicly humiliate his sister, but now that the Joker had turned the memory of his only love into a mockery, he couldn't help but feel his ire sky-rocket to a monumentous height.

When Dusty gasped, Harvey immediately turned his attention back to the television, his eyes narrowing as the Joker sustained, "...this is true, wouldn't you a-_gree,_ Mr. Hubbard? Your wife is very..._spir-i-ted,_ which is why I've decided to strap her inside a room full of _equally_ fiery explosives. But don't worry, Mr. Hubbard, your wife just might be saved _if_ your dear ol' brother-in-law makes the decision in her favorrr." Spinning the camera in a blur of color to Miranda's tear-stained face, the Joker purred, "A few miles away is Gotham Elementary...a _love_-uh-ly school filled with gifted and talented lit-tle children full of innocence..._naivite._ The building happens to be riddled with several ex-_plo-_sives just _waiting_ to go off, but by one o'clock the bombs detonate and school will be out a tad _early."_ Now turning the camera back to his scarred face, the Joker sustained, "Not to worry, Dent, not to worry...these _dar_-ling lit-tle angels will be spared, but _only_ if you make the ultimate sacrifice. Who's it going to be, Dent? Your sweet lit-tle sister, or the innocent children who've just _barely_ begun to live-uh?"

Feeling an overwhelming pang of nausea overtake him, Harvey placed a hand over his mouth as the screen turned snowy and faded out to black. "Jesus" he whispered.

Sending the DA a panicked look, Dusty fearfully demanded, "What the hell are we going to do, Harvey?"

"...I don't know."

--

Since the Joker had work to do, Rachel was left in charge of the stubborn prisoner. Chewing her lip, she scrutinized the blonde who seemed so intent on gazing at her shoes, her blue eyes softening as she immediately felt as if she could relate to her pain. Perhaps it was her woman's intuition, but Rachel truly felt as if she had some type of strange connection with Miranda Hubbard.

Scrutinizing the blonde's wavy, shoulder-length hair, tearful violet eyes, and flashy peach-colored gown, Rachel couldn't help but approach her with a newfound interest. "Excuse me" she warily began, "I'm sorry to bother you since I know you'd rather be left alone, but I couldn't help but notice a slight familiarity about you and your brother. Do either of you happen to know me?"

Lifting her gaze so that she could give Rachel a disdainful glare, Mirand shook her head before snapping, "No, can't say that I do, but I'm quite grateful for that. Those who work for the Joker are nothing but scum on the bottoms of my shoes!"

Rachel flinched. "Look, I'm _really_ sorry that my partner ended up choosing you for his plan, but..."

"Why are you even talking to me?" Miranda demanded. "Aren't you supposed to be a villain? Just cut the pretense and smack me around, already! I'm sure your stupid partner wants information..."

Miranda's words were like a sobering blow to the head, Rachel's eyes glittering with sorrow as she pitifully whispered, "I truthfully don't know how I feel, Mrs. Hubbard, and that's exactly why I'm so torn. I want to help my partner since he's been surprisingly kind to me, but then there's you...something deep inside is telling me that it's wrong to just let the Joker get away with this, but I feel powerless to stop him."

"But you're not" Miranda insisted. Sensing that she could get out of her current predicament, she urgently sustained, "You've got a cell phone with you, right? Just call up the GCPD and get me out of here!"

Rachel's blue eyes widened in understanding. "You're right" she finally agreed, "I need to stop worrying about the Joker's feelings and just go with my gut. If there's anything I've learned lately, it's that when it comes to instincts, they're typically the right way to go."

As Rachel flipped open her cell phone and dialed 911, she gave a start when the sensation of a cold blade slid across her chin.

"So tell me about those..._instincts"_ the Joker purred, his hand fisting her hair and tugging it as he placed the knife beneath her throat. "What are they telling you to do now, _hmm?"_

Rachel found that she couldn't answer his query, her mouth dry as sand as Miranda's terrified shouts became nothing more than a distant hum.

**A/N** - DUN DUN DUNNN Sadly, that was a lot of fun to write...I love tragic situations. XD But yeah, this was called "Something Borrowed, Someone Blue" because the Joker "borrowed" Miranda, and Harvey (or arguably Dusty) was left "blue". Yay me for being "deep". :-P I've nearly finished my second TDK parody vid (thank you to everyone for making the first such a hit!), and I've got two Jokachel vids up if you're interested. :) I also drew a picture of them playing strip poker, so if you're interested in seeing either the vids or the picture, you can go to my profile and find the links. Enjoy!

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

Harley Quinn - Hopefully this was fast enough for ya! SO sorry about the delay... :-S

Jia - Aww, well I don't mind at all! :) I love talking to you guys, 'cause you are awesoooome. XD And I know, haha, Bruce has it bad for lil Ms. Rachel, but then so does Harvey, Mr. J, and...and...oh, right. There isn't another guy. XD Might as well be, hehe!


	8. She Came and Left with the Wind

**A/N** - Wow, talk about nice classes this semester...I have TWO whole classes where I don't even have to pay attention, so I was able to work on this and my one-shots the entire time. :-D I also had more lovely Joker dreams, and I made a JOKACHEL COMMUNITY on livejournal called JokerRachelFans, so I _highly_ encourage you to join! I posted some splices of Mistah J and Rachel gettin' their groove on (nothing explicit), so you can see those there. :) P.S., I think my linguistics professor is a pimp...he has the one long pinky nail, and it's like wtf? lol Anywhos, sorry for leaving you guys hanging with yet ANOTHER cliffhanger, but I'm a butt-face like that. XD Hope you enjoy!

**CH 8: She Came and Left with the Wind**

Slamming Rachel against the adjacent wall, the Joker's eyes alighted with a molten fury as he pressed the blade in between her lips, her own eyes mirroring his gaze as she felt the knife cut into the corner of her mouth. Biting back tears, Rachel trembled as the familiar, tinny taste of blood began to pervade her senses, her hands gripping at his shoulders as she squeezed her eyes shut and silently willed him away.

Tugging at a lock of her blonde hair, the Joker snarled, "Where are your instincts _now,_ hm? What are they telling you to do to me? Save the day and put a bul-let in my buh-_rain?"_

"N-no" Rachel choked out, her voice hoarse.

The Joker gave her a mocking look. _"No?_ Why Harley, you disappoint me..." Suddenly removing the blade from her mouth and turning it so the handle was facing her, he grinned while cooing, "You wanna take it, don't you? You want to _revel_ in the sen-sation of my buh-lood _oozing_ down over your fingers?"

"No" Rachel sobbed, "no, I _don't!"_

"Well why not?" he purred. "You'd be doing Gotham a favor, not to mention you'd be helping your puh-_recious_ Harvey Dent-uh."

Gaping up at the Joker in surprise, Rachel felt an odd sensation overtake her at his words. Why had he said that, and why did her heart palpitate at the very thought of Harvey being _hers?_

Biting her lip, Rachel swallowed as the Joker wiped the blood away from her mouth with his finger, his lips pulling back into a sneer as he placed the gloved digit into his mouth and began to suck away her essence.

Feeling a disturbing sense of eroticism from his actions, Rachel closed her eyes and pressed herself more closely against the wall, a squeak escaping her lips when he wedged a knee in between her thighs and wrapped his hand about her throat.

"What am I going to do with you, _Harrr_ley?" he purred, his scars now rubbing against her cheek as he gave a groan. "Beautiful, _beautiful_ Harley..."

Shivering and powerless to stop him, Rachel gave a groan of her own when the Joker lapped at the wound on her mouth, his fingers fisting her hair as he continued to hold his knife to her chin.

"Please stop" Rachel begged, completely breathless. "Please, I don't want this..."

Feeling a well of fury stir within him at her words, the Joker tightened his grip about Rachel's throat as he snarled, "Oh, my poor, _poor_ Harley-Har-Har...do you think _I_ wanted it whenever my father came at me with his knife? Do you think I _wanted_ to be viewed as a fuh-_reak?"_

Confused and frightened by his sudden change of mood, Rachel's heartrate began to quicken as the Joker gave a growl and sent her sprawling to the floor, tears burning along her lashes as she curled up into a ball and shielded herself from his vicious blows.

"Get _up!"_ he hollered, his irises glistening with a pain and agony that Rachel had never before seen in his eyes. It frightened her, but at the same time it caused her bleeding heart to go out to him more than she'd ever willingly admit.

Slowly rising to her feet, Rachel wiped at her cheeks while mumbling a hushed apology, the Joker promptly stalking past her in order to bring a terrified Miranda Hubbard to sit upon a chair.

"It's time" he grumbled, his hands visibly shaking as he pulled a cell phone out from his coat pocket. "Call up dear ol' Harvey-boy and see what he's decided."

Giving him an incredulous look, Miranda moved to remind him that she was tied up when the Joker suddenly giggled, his palm slapping his forehead as he remarked, "Ah, right, right, _right..._don't worry, _I'll_ do it." Dialing the number, he then placed the phone by the blonde's ear and waited, a sick sense of pleasure filling his soul at the sight of her abundant tears.

After a brief pause, Miranda choked out, "Harvey? Hi, it's me...i-it's Miranda..."

_"Mandy?_ Oh, thank God, are you ok? Has he hurt you? Do you need...?"

"No, no, I'm fine, Harvey" she miserably assured him, "please just tell me how you're doing..."

Harvey notably paused, his voice quivering with emotion as he whispered, "Even now you're thinking of everyone but yourself... _God,_ Mandy, it's ok to be scared."

Miranda gave a tearful smile. "Oh Harvey, I _am_ scared... I'm scared for you and Dusty...I'm scared that once I'm gone he'll go after you, too."

"Oh, gimme a break" the Joker groused. "Just get him to tell you his answer, already!"

Cringing at his tone, Miranda visibly trembled before closing her eyes, her breath growing shaky as she sustained, "Now Harvey, I know you don't want to hear this, but...but it's time for you to tell me your decision."

"No" Harvey argued, "no, I can't tell you, Mandy...go ahead and put the Joker on, please."

Miranda bit her lip. "Harvey, it's _ok_ if you choose the children -- in fact, I _want_ you to."

"Mandy, for the love of _God,_ just let me talk to the Joker!"

"Harvey, _stop_ it!" Miranda shouted, tears streaming down her cheeks as she miserably shook her head. "You're just prolonging the inevitable, and I want you to know that I won't hate you for not choosing me...in fact, you'll be my biggest hero since you'll be sacrificing a part of yourself for the sake of our city. I _love_ you, big brother, and these past few years have been nothing short of great for me. I never thought we'd be given a second chance to grow up together, and now..." She gave a tearful smile. "...Now you can tell your children how your bitchy sister would give you wet willies while you drove to work."

Harvey laughed, but it was noticeably strained. There was a long pause, then a pitiful "I'm _so_ sorry", the sound of the DA's sniffling causing Miranda's heart to break as the Joker abruptly yanked the phone away and brought it to his hear. "You done yet, Dent?" he taunted, a delighted gleam coming to his eye when he heard Harvey given an outraged roar. "Whoa, whoa, _whoa,_ watch the language, _Harrr_vey...wouldn't want Miranda's lit-tle baby to hear such _dread_-ful words, hm?"

"You son of a bitch, if I _ever_ find you alone, so help me God..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, I know, you'll kill me, but that's _so_ boring" the Joker disinterestedly returned. "Couldn't you spice it up a bit by saying _how_ you're going to kill me? Poison, perhaps? A nice bludgeoning to the head? Or, even better, a reinactment of _The Texas Chainsaw Massacre_?"

There was a pause, then the sound of Harvey's ragged breathing, his tone tired and filled with sheer enmity as he hollered, "I've chosen the children, _alright?_ What more could you possibly want from me!? I chose a bunch of kids I've never met over my own _sister_ -- a woman I happen to love _very_ much -- and her unborn child! How cold and unfeeling can you be? How can you murder them in cold blood just for the sake of my _suffering!?"_

The Joker giggled. "If you think long and _hard-uh_, Harrvey Dent, I think you'll find that you've just answered your own quh-uestion. Seeing the emotions on a grieving individual is unique -- tre-men-dous-ly _fascinating_ -- and being the one to _cause_ said grief is almost orgasmic. Having such control over just _one_ life is like playing God, and that's when I truh-uly feel like I can relate to the Big Man upstairs. He has power and I _want_ power...He giveth life, and I take it away. So you see, _Harrr_vey, the thin line between good versus evil really _is_ non-existant...convoluted..._blurrrred._ When you go home at night, you'll feel a sense of emptiness knowing that you'll never get _all_ the bad guys in Gotham, but me?" The Joker giggled. _"Me,_ I go home and just laugh til I cry, 'cause there are puh-_len_-ty of people out there like you who believe they can make a difference. If you'd just look in the mirror, you'd re-a-lize that the one monster you truly need to stop is _yourself."_

Harvey took in a sharp breath. "You're crazy...what have you done with my sister!?"

The Joker sucked his teeth, his tongue clicking as he snapped, "No, I'm not. No...I'm..._not_-uh."

"Yes, you _are!_ Who _else_ finds it amusing to warp minds and murder children!?" Harvey demanded. "Don't you normally like to give the location so your damn game can be furthered!?"

The Joker snorted. "Uhh, normally you'd be right, but since you're able to, uh...e-_stab_-lish my patterns, I'd say that that approach is now _boring._ I'd hate to _bore _you, after all, so why don't we spice things up a bit and let you _guess_ where Mir-an-duh is?"

"You monster! I swear to God, I'll put a bounty on your head, and then I'll..."

Promptly hanging up, the Joker turned to Miranda before remarking, "Well _that_ went rather well, wouldn't you agree?" Giggling at the ireful look on her face, he motioned to Rachel's silent form and forcefully urged, "C'mere."

Paling, Rachel stiffened when he beckoned to her yet again, her eyes narrowing as she approached him with a deep sense of abhorrence.

"Aww, why so serious, _Har_ley?" the Joker crooned, his gloved hand wrapping about her neck as he pulled her face close to his. "Is there something buh-_rewing_ inside that beautiful mind of yours?"

Taking a shaky breath, Rachel managed to meet with his derisive gaze as she choked out, "This is wrong...I don't see why we need to hurt this woman and her loved ones when it's not affecting Gotham as a whole."

The Joker rolled his eyes. "My God, woman, are you really _that_ dense? Dent is Gotham's white knight, and if he falls from grace, this oh-so-_charm_-ing city will follow close behind-uh."

"And Miranda is key to Harvey's downfall?"

The Joker grinned. _"Noooow_ you're getting it, beautiful... Whoever said that you can't teach a buh-londe new tricks, hm?"

Scowling, Rachel shunted from his touch and folded her arms, her eyes still blazing as she grumbled, "I _still_ don't think it's right..."

"Aww, well isn't that _touching?_ You always _were_ a buh-leeding heart, Harley."

"I'm serious!" Rachel shouted. "I've gone along with all of your plans thus far, but this is one plan I cannot accept! Mrs. Hubbard is _pregnant,_ Joker...how can you be so cruel?"

The Joker snorted. _"How,_ you ask? As you should already know by now, Harrrley, I don't think about things, I just _do."_

"Maybe so, but just because you're alone in this world doesn't mean that you have to drag everyone down with you!" As soon as Rachel said these words, she immediately regretted them, her eyes widening as she watched the Joker turn pink from the neck up.

_'Great'_ she thought, _'I've hit a nerve...'_

Before Rachel could even think to apologize, the Joker began laughing like a raving lunatic, tears prickling along his kohl lashes as he doubled over and slapped his knee.

More horrified by this behavior than the alternative, Rachel slowly backed away from him while demanding, "W-what the hell is wrong with you? There's nothing funny about what I just said!"

"Oooh, but that's where you're wruh-_ong,_ Harley" the Joker crooned, his dark eyes now losing their mirth as he took a foreboding step forward. "Without humor, there is no laughter, without laughter there is no _hap_-pi-ness, and without happiness, you might as well be six feet underground-uh. There is _always_ something funny about a situation, no matter how morbid or i-ron-ic said humor may seem." Grinning, he added, "Take _Harr_vey, for example...he's spent his entire ca-reer bringing about justice and saving lives, but when his own flesh and buh-lood is in danger, he can neither de-liver justice _or_ safety. Now _that_ I find funny!"

As the Joker burst into a fit of giggles, Rachel clenched her fists at her sides as her ire continued to build. This wasn't right, it _wasn't!_

Before she could strike him like she clearly desired, the Joker retrieved his detonator and wriggled his eyebrows. "It's time-uh" he purred. "Take out your cell phone and call up the MCU."

"W-what?"

"Just _do_ it!"

Startled by his gruff tone, Rachel fumbled for her phone before dialing the desired number, her hand trembling as she heard the weary voice of Commissioner Gordon over the other end of the line.

"H-hi" she stammered, "I'm, uh...I'm calling to, uh, to, uh..."

"Give the location" the Joker supplied, thus causing Rachel to nod and return to her task at hand.

"Um, I'm calling to give the location" she anxiously sustained, her tongue wetting her lips as Gordon gave a rebuke of surprise. "I know sir, I know" she acknowledged, "but I can assure you that this isn't a crock. Miranda Hubbard is currently stationed inside a warehouse on 252nd Street."

"What? But that's impossible!" Gordon argued. "That's the remodeled warehouse where Rachel Dawes was murdered three years ago...why would the Joker choose to be so predictable?"

An odd sensation overcame Rachel as she heard this news, yet she couldn't quite ascertain why that was. "I-I don't know, sir, but I'm standing here with Miranda right now" she assured him. "Please just send help over right away...you only have until 1:00 to save her life!"

Cursing, Gordon immediately hung up and left Rachel hanging on the other end, her eyes narrowing considerably when the Joker began to applaud.

"Buh-_ril-_liant performance, my dear...I almost thought you cared!" he mocked, a toothy grin crossing his lips when Rachel glared back at him as if she'd been accosted.

"I _do_ care" she snarled, "and for once I hope you get what's coming to you."

To her utmost surprise, he giggled before returning, "Well so do I, Miss Quin-zel, so do I..."

--

Rubber tires screeched against concrete as Gordon's patrol car came on the scene, the driver slamming down on the breaks before skidding to a halt in front of the warehouse. Retrieving his walkie-talkie, Gordon frantically hollered, "I need units ten and twelve to evacuate the victim, I _repeat,_ I need units ten and twelve to evacuate the victim! Once the school is officially decamped, I need all units to report to 252nd Street ASAP!"

As Gordon's teams began to respond to his order, he glanced up toward the windows and saw Miranda frantically shaking her head 'no', her body teetering back and forth as she continued to struggle amidst her bindings. Confused, Gordon opened the car door and shielded his eyes so he could see her face more clearly, her screams of protest being muffled by the glass as hot, molten tears streamed down her cheeks.

His eyes suddenly flickering with recognition, Gordon fumbled for his walkie-talkie while shouting, "No, no, don't go in there, it's rigged to-"

With a deafening roar, a wave of voracious flames interrupted the commissioner's words as the building exploded in a fiery burst of scarlet, his cries of bewilderment being stifled by the earth as he found himself being thrust straight upon its grassy bosom. Coughing, Gordon weakly curled up into a ball as he gazed upon the smoldering warehouse, his heart breaking the moment he saw a familiar car come upon the chaotic scene. When the driver's door opened, a wretched scream tore throughout the air, the commissioner squeezing his eyes closed amidst his failure as Harvey dropped down to his knees. With another wail, Harvey began beating his fists against the earth as he released an anguished cry, tears cutting down his cheeks in burning tracks as he gazed upon the collapsing building as if he were a child being torn from his mother's bosom.

"Harvey" Gordon hoarsely choked out, "Harvey, I am _so_ sorry..."

"You didn't save her" he moaned, "that woman gave you the location, but you didn't fucking _save_ her!"

Gordon winced. "Harvey, we tried everything we could..."

"No" the DA feverishly argued, "you clearly did a piss-poor job, because if you actually _had_ tried your best, my sister would be safe and in her husband's arms where she belongs!"

Shakily rising to his feet, Gordon moved to comfort Harvey, but the grieving man had already returned to his car and slammed down on the gas. Seeing the site where his dearest loved ones had both perished was currently far too much...

--

Stifling a yawn, Charlotte Ramsay leaned back at her desk as she continued to play solitaire, her nerves too shot from the earlier events of the day to do anything remotely productive. Just when she realized that she was on the verge of winning, an impatient voice asked her, "May I see Commissioner Gordon, please?"

Without even bothering to look up, Charlotte disinterestedly returned, "Sorry, but the commissioner's really busy and specifically requested that he didn't want any visitors."

"Oh, but I think he'll see me" the British woman persisted, a plain smile tugging at her lips as she sustained, "I've got some rather interesting news to share regarding the late Rachel Dawes."

**A/N** - Yaaay, another cliffhanger! I love those! :-D Er...but not when YOU guys write them, hahaha. XD -evil- I made some more Jokachel vids and another parody, so when you have the time, I'd be very appreciative if you could check them out. :) And join my Jokachel group, gosh darn it! XD Oh, and the title of this chapter was kinda-sorta obviously made to represent how Miranda left Gotham as quickly as she came..._WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!_ X( lol

P.S. I'm sad I killed Miranda off...I actually liked writing for her. Boo-hoo. lol

IF I'M RIGHT IN MY THINKING (when am I right? Ho! Ho! Ho!) there will be a _LOOOOVE SCENE_ in the following chapter or the one after, so if that sorta stuff offends you, RUN AWAAAAAY!

imidol09 - Well, here I am, writing again! :-D Thank you so much for reading!

The Queen of Hearts - LOL!! Did you get that turkey sub you wanted? :-D Because I just answered your questions with this chapter, so now you must answer mine, hahaha. Well, I didn't answer ALL your questions in this chapter, but you'll find out the rest come chapter 9, I believe. ;0) And no, the strip poker won't be in this story, it'll be in my group of one-shots "Blood and Lust". :) I've actually co-written it with a friend already, so now it just needs editing.

Jia - LMAO Oh God, I think like the Joker? Hahaha, that might be a VERY bad thing, now that I think about it... XD At first I was really flattered, and then I was like... o-O DUN DUN DUNNNNN I'm destined to be INSAAAAANE! Hahaha But seriously, thanks so much for reading! I'm really glad you enjoyed it! :)


	9. Beneath the Mask

**A/N** - Holy CRAP, this was hard! I just couldn't get my "groove" on with all the stupid reading and writing papers I had to do, so hopefully it's adequate! I also think it's the longest chapter I've ever written (maybe?) so yay me! :-D

WARNING: Violence and semi-graphic sexual content -- if either of those things offend you, PLEASE do NOT read any further. For those of you who don't give a flying fudge monkey, please read on! :)

**CH 9: Beneath the Mask**

When Harvey awoke the next morning, he felt as if all the life had been drained from his weary body. Shuffling into the living room like a zombie, he wasn't particularly surprised to find Dusty sitting motionlessly on the couch, his eyes bloodshot and swollen as he continued to bathe amidst the TV's illuminating glow.

Upon driving home after the accident, Harvey became concerned for Dusty and offered him a place to stay for the night. He figured his brother-in-law wouldn't want to be left alone, but the truth of the matter was that _he_ didn't want to be alone, either. Ashleen had gone out of town to visit some in-laws for the week, so Harvey had been left to wallow amidst his sorrows in complete solitude.

"Isn't she beautiful?"

Startled back to reality, it was then that Harvey realized that Dusty had been watching his and Miranda's wedding reception, the DA's throat tightening as his sister's glowing face lit up the screen like a beacon of radiant sunshine.

Mechanically having a seat alongside Dusty, Harvey trembled as he watched Miranda squeal as she ran from the camera, her laughter ringing like bells as her new husband grabbed her by the hand and pulled her back toward the camera.

_"Tell everyone why you married such a wonderful man"_ he urged, laughing along with her as she gave him a shove.

Turning toward the camera and pretending as if she were in deep thought, Miranda warmly decided, _"Well I don't really know, but I've always had somewhat of a sweet tooth, so I'm guessing it's because I wanted a giant cake. It's definitely not because of your dance skills, because you stepped on my toes three times during our first dance as husband and wife!"_

Harvey heard himself laugh as he filmed the playful couple, his heart feeling a dull ache as Miranda turned back toward the camera and gave him a bright smile. _"Speaking of dances, you'd better get ready, big brother, 'cause we're about ready to have ours now. I hope you're a little better about watching my feet than Dusty..."_

As Harvey heard this, he recalled how he'd been quite eager to give his sister the perfect wedding, so he'd agreed to take their late father's place by sharing the father-daughter dance.

The camera shook with Harvey's laughter as his hand entered the picture in order to tweak her nose. _"Yeah, yeah, I may be a klutz, but you're heavy on your feet."_

Miranda playfully swatted at his hand. _"Are you calling me fat?"_

_"If the waistband fits."_

_"Harvey!"_ Giggling, his sister took him by the wrist and urged him onto the dance floor, the DJ grinning as he announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, it's now time for the father...er, brother-sister dance!"

Beaming, Miranda linked her arms around Harvey's neck in the customary fashion, but that's when "Tango Maureen" began blasting over the speakers and causing their audience to gasp in delight. Harvey had been rather apprehensive about choreographing a duel-like tango with his sister, but now as he watched them dance across the screen, he found that he didn't regret making Miranda happy. She'd always been a fan of Rent, so she'd pleaded with him to act out a scene from the production for their dance; fortunately for their audience, they'd decided to lipsync all of the lyrics.

When Miranda opened her mouth and began 'singing', Harvey suddenly found that he couldn't take it anymore. Seeing his sister happy and glowing with pleasure was one thing, but seeing her happy when he knew he'd never see her beautiful smile again pained him deeply.

Shakily rising from the couch, Harvey bowed his head before mumbling, "Miranda's viewing starts in a few hours, so you should probably start getting ready pretty soon. If you need it, you can use the bathroom down the hall."

When Dusty blankly nodded in return, Harvey bit his lip and dejectedly stalked back toward his room. What a Godawful day to have to wear black...

--

"And why did you feel the need to inform me about a dead woman, Dr. Dandridge?" Gordon demanded, his sharp eyes cutting toward the woman before him as she began fishing around in her purse.

Ceasing her actions when she found what she needed, Collette couldn't help but smirk as she raised her gaze to his with a sense of smug satisfaction. "Why, my good sir, I've come to you because she isn't dead" she returned, her hand retracting a slip of paper as she leaned back in her seat. "The day of Miss Dawes' accident, I received an anonymous phone call stating that a Rachel Dawes would be brought under my care in a matter of eight or so hours since she was being transported by plane. When she finally arrived, my orderlies found her completely abandoned on the front step of our hospital. The poor little bint was burnt beyond recognition, so we immediately set to work on giving her skin graphs and hair plugs. Here are her medical papers." Handing Gordon the documented records, Collette studied his disbelieving countenance before sustaining, "I knew her as Rachel Dawes for about three years, but I never even dreamed to question her origin since her anonymous donor was paying us quite handsomely. I know this must seem bloomin' horrid to you, good sir, but I have never been one to bite the hand that feeds."

Gordon frowned. "You said you knew her as Rachel Dawes for three years...what did you mean by that?"

"I mean that after that point I was instructed to call her Harleen Quinzel" Collette returned, her fingers steepling before her as she crossed her legs. "I couldn't bloody well understand it, but her donor claimed that Rachel Dawes had been her alias for some sort of means of protection. Although I was incredulous over this sudden chain of events, I informed Rachel of her 'true' identity as instructed, and, to my dismay, she couldn't recollect a single thing about her former life. When I returned after running some tests, some looney bampot had the poor thing in his arms, so I shouted at him to release her. Unfortunately for us both, I failed to notice the gun, and he ended up rendering me unconscious and hospitalized for quite some time. As I'm sure you can already guess, my assailant was none other than Gotham's balmy terrorist, the Joker."

Gordon balked. "Oh, my God... And you said her so-called name was what, again?"

"Harleen Quinzel."

His brows furrowing, the commissioner motioned to Collette before urging, "Come with me...we've got a situation you should probably be told about."

--

Trembling, Rachel continued to sit on her couch watching the morning news, her arms wrapping around herself for warmth as the story of Miranda's death flashed garishly across the scene.

_'That bastard'_ she thought. _'The Joker let me call Gordon to give everyone a sense of hope, but he knew that Miranda would die along... The son of a bitch rigged the door to explode, and now she's dead! Oh God, she's dead, and I helped lead her to the gallows!'_

Biting her lip, Rachel felt tears blurring her vision in hot torrents, but she made no move to wipe her eyes for fear of witnessing more heartache. Turning the TV off with a flick of her wrist, she moved to lie down across the cushions, but that's when she heard it...

Craning her head, Rachel scowled once she realized that the water to her bathroom was running fullforce. That prick was taking a shower in _her_ apartment with _her_ towels, and after all he'd done, he thought he could just get away with it?

_'I'll show him'_ Rachel inwardly seethed, her limbs shaking as she stormed down the hallway.

To claim that she was angry at that moment was an understatement, for she was downright _furious._ The Joker had known that she would play into his plan all along, but now that she knew the full truth, she was completely determined to let him know that their partnership was officially over.

"Joker!" Banging on the bathroom door with all her might, Rachel leaned in with the hopes of hearing his most likely sarcastic retort, but instead she received an infuriating bout of silence. _"Joker!"_ she tried again, only louder this time, "stop fooling around and get out of that damned shower -- we need to talk!"

When a cheerful humming greeted her in response, Rachel lividly ripped open the unlocked door and went storming into the bathroom with her fists clenched. The steam from the water acted as a type of smoke screen, her eyes squinting through the moist clouds as she grabbed the shower curtain and yanked it aside.

The suddenness of Rachel's actions caused the figure behind the curtain aegis to jump, his chest heaving as he trained his harrowed gaze upon the woman before him.

Gaping up at him in surprise, Rachel felt her jaw drop as her blue eyes fell upon the enraged stranger, his dirty blonde hair clinging damply to his cheeks as his bottom lip began to quiver. He was considerably young -- not much older than her by a far -- and the way he currently hunched his shoulders struck her as being eerily familiar.

Rachel was overcome by the insatiable urge to ask who this man was, but that's when her searching gaze fell upon his haunting eyes. The chocolate sienna orbs were animalistic, yet at the same time they were filled with a deep sense of agony that she couldn't quite place. Although they currently weren't ringed with twin spots of black, Rachel knew those eyes anywhere. It was the Joker..._her_ Joker.

"Speechlessss, are we?" he growled, a manevolent grin stretching his surprisingly pale scars as he observed her. "What do you think of me now, hmm? Are you a-_fraid?_ Do I...dis-_gust_ you?"

Mouth quivering, Rachel moved to answer him when he suddenly seized her by the wrist and pulled her under the showerhead, a cry escaping her lips when he viciously slammed her up against the wall and gripped at her throat. Curling his fingers tightly about her windpipe, the Joker brought his face close to hers before snarling, "Is this the face of a man you could love-uh, or is it the visage of a _mon-sterrr?"_

Tears of frustration rolled down Rachel's cheeks like molten glass, but she found that she could only shake her head as she gazed back at him in pity. "Why would I fear you now when I've never feared you before? Your soul is what makes you a monster, Joker, not your scars."

Gazing back at her with a critical eye, the clown prince of crime looked as if he were about to speak when he suddenly burst into a fit of giggles, his eyes crinkling along with his mirth as he mocked, "And what school of phi-los-o-phy did you get _that_ lousy quote from, hmm? The same puh-lace where they tell everyone that a lit-tle bit of kindness goes a long way?" Flicking his tongue across his lips, the Joker grinned before sustaining, "Sorry beautiful, but if you were hoping to change me with your oh-so-touching lit-tle speech, I'm afraid to inform you that I'm never going to change so long as I'm living. I, uh..._died_ the day I got these scars, so I know I'll always be trapped in limbo until my time's fin-al-ly up-uh." Noting the pained look in Rachel's eyes, he gave her a cold smile before cooing, "Aww, well what's the matter, _Har_ley? My story too_ raw_ for you to handle?"

"No" Rachel lowly returned, "It's just that I...I never knew you hated your own life so much." Biting her lip, she couldn't help but feel an overwhelming rush of pity for the clown prince stir within her breast, her throat tightening as she felt as if she could cry for his anguish. At first she had been tremendously angry with the Joker, but that was before she got a glimpse at the warped and twisted reasoning behind the mask. Being a woman who adored life (albeit rather hectic at the moment), her heart always went out to those who felt that they no longer had a purpose. And the Joker...

Rachel bit her lip.

_God,_ he was actually an attractive young man, so what had caused him to spiral out of control so violently? To seek death and destruction as his only source of solace?

Before Rachel could even think to stop herself, she reached out a hand and traced her fingers along one of the Joker's puffy scars, her gaze softening when she noticed him flinch in surprise.

"Don't _do_ that-uh" he gruffly warned, but she ignored him and slid her thumb across his lips before curving up along the other scar.

"They don't frighten me" she firmly reminded him, the look in her eyes hard and penetrating as she sustained, "I may hate you right now, but you need a friend, and I...if you'll let me, I'd like to be that friend."

The Joker released a whoop of a laugh. "Well gee, why didn't _I_ think of that before? If I'd have just found a fuh-_riend,_ none of this would've ever happened!" Curling his fingers about her throat to the point of pain, he bared his yellow teeth before snarling, "I don't _need_ your pit-y, and I'll _never_ need someone to co-rrect the way I am, so I'd sug-gest that you, uh..._end_ whatever plans you have buh-rewing inside that mind of yoursss."

Gaping up at him in wide-eyed surprise, Rachel gave a yelp when he tightened his grip and wedged a knee in between her legs, a chilling grin splitting his lips when he lecherously observed the damp nightgown clinging to her frame.

Licking at the water droplets that had accumulated along her chin, the Joker chuckled as he purred, "I _do,_ howeverrr, miss those lit-tle run-in's we used to have...the ones where I'd, uh..._pin_ you to the wall and have my way with you."

Feeling her pulse quicken in accordance with his words, Rachel whimpered when he nuzzled the crook of her neck and bit at her pulse, his tongue snaking along her flesh as he heatedly reminded her, "Three years is a _looong_ time to wait, Harley...if you _really_ want to be a friend-uh, you'll let me _touch_ you."

Bewildered by his sudden change of behavior, Rachel gasped when she felt the Joker press his pulsating desire against her middle, his scars brushing against her cheek as she deliriously closed her eyes. The sensation of his unpainted skin against her own made her shiver, her body squirming as she felt his hands rove across her inviting breasts in a delicate caress. As he touched her, she couldn't help but marvel at said hands, for within those appendages laid such monstrous power and strength that they could slay whomever he so chose. Each finger was an intricately designed instrument of death, yet Rachel was somehow unafraid of him and the possibility of his actually killing her. She knew fully well that if he were going to harm her he would've already done so, and the very prospect of his sparing her life over everyone else was quite thrilling to Rachel.

"Why don't you fight me?" the Joker suddenly asked. The tone in his voice almost sounded disappointed, but for some reason this didn't change Rachel's current string of feelings.

Taking a deep breath, she softly returned, "I'm tired of fighting you because I know I'll never win...you're a hopeless case, and I've learned to just accept that."

The Joker reached for her neck yet again, but this time his hold on her throat was almost tender, the warm sienna of his eyes wavering like a summer breeze as he brought his gaze up to meet with hers. "You are a very _foo_-lish girrl, Harley...where's the spark, hmm? Or have you fi-nal-ly just resorted to being my lit-tle sex toy? Either way, I win."

A burst of fury spread across Rachel's eyes like a wildfire in accordance with his words, her fist acting before her brain as she sent a surprisingly powerful uppercut across his jaw that caused him to stagger back.

Giving a whoop of a laugh, the Joker rubbed his sore chin as he grinned back at her in excitement, his eyes darkening with lust as he eagerly purred, "Mmm, _now_ we're talkin'...c'mere."

Crying out, Rachel moved to leap out of the shower, but the Joker seized her by the wrist and pulled her body flush against him in response, his scarred mouth meeting savagely with hers as his nails dug into her scalp like knives. The drugging sensation of the warm water mixed with the Joker's firm lips made Rachel groan, her eyes closing in defeat as she allowed him to envelope her within his arms and viciously slam her up against the wall. Keeping her pinned in place with his hips, the Joker scratched his nails down her back before plundering her mouth with his tongue, a low growl rumbling in his chest when he felt her own tongue sweep gently across his lips.

Breathlessly parting his mouth from hers, the Joker grinned devilishly back at Rachel before tearing the buttons to her nightgown asunder, the flimsy fabric parting in order to reveal the smooth curves that'd haunted him for the past three years.

Hungrily lowering his mouth to one hardened nipple, he flicked his moist tongue over the bud while eagerly caressing the other.

Gasping at the incredible sensation at hand, Rachel closed her eyes as she roughly fisted his dirty blonde locks, her head lolling to the side as her bosom began heaving along with her growing arousal. With each tug at her soft breast, there was a responding tug from deep in between her thighs, her liquid desire pooling into her panties as she felt the Joker's hands meditatively drift down to caress the pink lace of the waistband.

When Rachel moved to assist him in the removal of her undergarments, the Joker firmly slapped her hand away and pressed her back up against the wall, his face burying into the crook of her neck as he suddenly gave a sharp thrust against her throbbing nub.

With an impassioned cry, Rachel gripped at his shoulders before squeezing her eyes tightly closed, her teeth gritting as the sadistic maniac thrust against her once again.

"Do I...a-_rouse_ you?" he asked, his tongue flicking across her ear as he punctuated each word with a firm thrust. When Rachel gave a feeble moan in response, he giggled before thrusting harder and faster against her clothed sex, his fingers gripping at her thighs as he forced them apart in order to better accomodate his administrations.

Feeling as if she could cry from the mind-numbing pleasure, Rachel bit her lip to stifle her breathy moans as the heat in between her legs began to spread, her back arching as she suddenly realized that she might come just from his erotic teasing, alone.

Slipping a hand past the waistband of Rachel's panties, the Joker grinned as he ran his fingers along her nub and eagerly retracted the digits before holding them up to the light. "Aaah, so you _are_ a-roused" he purred, his tongue snaking out in order to taste her essence as Rachel watched on with quivering lips.

Licking his fingers until they were clean, the Joker grinned a shark-like grin as he suddenly forced the attorney's panties down to her knees, his voice low and husky as he explained, "Just one taste isn't e-_nough_-uh."

Whimpering, Rachel closed her eyes as the Joker placed rough, artless kisses from her breasts down to her navel, only to then lick his way toward the soft flesh of her inner thighs. When he roughly forced her knees apart, Rachel gave a small squeak of surprise at the sudden action, her teeth biting into her lower lip when she felt him give her entrance a slow, deliberate lick.

"Joker" she whispered, "please, I..." Before she could complete her sentence, he pressed his tongue deep inside her moist haven and eagerly swirled it around her plush walls, a cry escaping her lips as she subconsciously began to thrust her hips in time to the delectable rhythm of his tongue.

Just when Rachel thought she would finally be granted her sweet release, the Joker suddenly withdrew and slammed her against the wall so that her head cracked against the tiling, his lips meeting with hers in a brutal kiss that forced her to taste her own exotic flavor. Moaning when he sucked on her tongue, she moved to touch his scarred chest when he suddenly grabbed her by the rump and hefted her up into his arms, her eyes widening in surprise before he vigorously impaled her with his throbbing shaft.

Whimpering at the sensation of her body adjusting to the Joker's girth, Rachel bit her lip as he began to roughly hammer his hips against hers with little regard for her personal well-being. Gripping at the soft curves of her bottom, the Joker angled his thrusts so that he penetrated her deeper and faster, his eyes rolling back in his head as he gritted his teeth amidst his pleasure. Feeling her wrapped so snugly around his firm arousal just felt _so_ good...

With a hiss of pleasure, Rachel wound her legs about the Joker's hips to better accomodate his frenzied pumping, her breasts bouncing amidst their brutal dance as she pulled him in for yet another fierce kiss. All of her prior anger and frustration channeled into that one kiss as she met with each of his thrusts, her teeth gnashing painfully against his bottom lip until she drew blood.

Not surprisingly, the Joker fully enjoyed this little act of violence, a predatorial growl rumbling in his chest as he bit her back and lapped at their intermingled blood. When he felt her body tense and grip at his member like a warm vice, he grunted and sensed his release coming on at full speed. Leaning in toward her ear, he urged in a strained whisper, "Call me Jack", Rachel's eyes widening in astonishment as his sudden declaration of identity fully dawned on her.

With three more quick and hard thrusts, the Joker emptied his seed deep inside his conquest in a burst of liquid fire, a gutteral cry escaping his lips as Rachel blissfully shouted his proper name.

When the Joker shakily withdrew from Rachel's warm body, he discovered that she had tears in her gentle blue eyes. With a deep-set scowl on his face, he turned off the water and irritably stepped out of the shower, his voice surprisingly emotionless as he instructed her on where he'd left the towels. Giving her one last indifferent glance, the Joker grabbed a towel of his own before turning and leaving the room without another word.

Positively stunned by this unexpected behavior, Rachel's legs suddenly gave out beneath her and she went sliding down the tiled wall until she landed on her rump. With her damp hair sticking against the surface of the gaudy tile, Rachel hugged her naked form for support and cried. She cried for her loss of dignity, she cried for the abundant revulsion she currently had for herself, but most of all, she cried because the Joker had _almost_ let her inside his unbreakable shell.

--

Miserably looping his black tie about his neck, Harvey kept his eyes trained solely on his task at hand as he slowly walked down the hall. "Dusty?" he called, "Hey buddy, you almost ready?"

When he didn't answer right away, Harvey frowned and curiously approached the bathroom door. From what he could discern, the light was most definitely on inside, so he raised his fist and rapped impatiently against the oak finish. "Hey, Dusty?" he tried yet again, "C'mon, we've really got to get going...our friends and family are waiting."

When Dusty still didn't respond, Harvey was suddenly overcome by an overwhelming sense of nausea. The hairs prickling on the back of his neck, he shakily fumbled for the door knob -- which was surprisingly unlocked -- and forced his way in past the entrance.

Upon Harvey's first once-over of the room, everything appeared to be neat, orderly, and in place. When his gaze swept over toward the bath tub, however, he swore under his breath when he noticed the bloody arm draped over the side of the tub. "Dusty!" the DA shouted, his limbs shaking as he frantically rushed over to his lifeless friend. Slapping the brunette on the cheek, a sense of panic pierced Harvey's heart like a harpoon when he spotted the razor. "Oh Jesus, Dusty" he cursed, his entire body shaking as he tried to move his brother-in-law into a sitting position. "Oh God, can you hear me?"

"M-Miranda?" Dusty choked, a dreamy smile crossing his features as he looked up at the DA through foggy eyes. "I knew you'd be here...I've always had a distinct suspicion that you liked seeing me naked."

Wincing, Harvey argued, "No Dusty, Mandy's gone...i-it's me, Harvey. I'm going to go call for help, so I need you to..."

"Oooh, hey, Harv" Dusty groggily interjected. "I came to ask you a big favor, so I'm really hoping you'll say yes."

"Dusty, I..."

"No, no, hear me out" he forcefully urged. "As you already know, Miranda and I have been dating for a while now, so I wanted to do things right and ask you for her hand. Will ya say yes, Harv?" When his brother-in-law failed to answer, Dusty weakly searched for him with his eyes, but found that he couldn't see him due to his irreversible delirium. Languidly fluttering his lashes, he hoarsely assured the DA, "I'll take real good care of her, I promise...I'm crazy about that girl."

Harvey swallowed a lump in his throat as he watched Dusty deteriorate before his very eyes, his blonde head bowing as he sorrowfully returned, "I-I know you will..."

"Then I have your blessing?"

Nodding, Harvey felt his fractured heart break when Dusty breathed his last breath, a strangled cry escaping the DA's throat as he pulled at his hair and began to sob hysterically. As he rose and began to violently tear the bathroom apart, he found that it wasn't faceless appliances that he was destroying, but the Joker...

**A/N** - Done! THANK GOD! Hopefully it didn't disappoint! For those of you who were wondering what 'balmy', 'bampot', and 'bloomin'' mean, I included the definitions below since I used an actual British dictionary of slang. Somebody had mentioned to me how Collette didn't sound British, so I tried to adapt some of their sayings into her speech patterns. I was surprised to see that we (Americans) got some of our slang from the British, like 'biatch', 'butt munch', and 'bling-bling'! lol

balmy - insane

bampot - A foolish and objectionable person

bloomin' - very

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

Alex - Awww, thank you so much! And hey, drugs are BAD for you! Even fic drugs! :-P And hm, I love that song, but I can't remember all the lyrics...I'll have to go back and give it a good listen. :)

Sam - Wow, you really think so? Thank you so, SO much!

A/N - Haha, hopefully this was fast enough for you, although I doubt it since it wasn't fast enough to MY liking. :-S

Jia - Hahaha, no, I'm pretty sure you're not the only one...it was kind of sad, because Miranda's death seemed to be totally eclipsed by the prospect of a love scene, because the majority of my reviewers were like "zomg, clown on attorney action FTW!" lol

JOIN TWITTER AND FOLLOW ME ON THERE! WE CAN BE NERDS TOGETHER!! I created a Kendra Luehr page, a Miranda Dent page (cuz OC's are fun!), and a Rachel Dawes page when I found that the chick who was already on there was kinda lackluster. No offense to her or anything, but she had zero personality...guess she's staying in-character then, right? hehe You can tell the difference between us when you're searching by reading the bio; I'm the one who professes a love for Ben and Jerry's ice cream. :-D PLEASE follow me, especially for the character pages, cuz nobody's talked to me in-character yet, and that's no fun to have fan pages without any interaction. :( There are other TDK pages on there too, but the one who actually responds to fans the most is Dr. Crane. He rules. :)

I also made my first non-Jokachel vid on youtube called "Love Song for a Monster", which is basically about Harvey realizing Rachel's really gone. It was fun, and the song's gorgeous, so it gives me chills every time I hear it, especially since I know the underlying message. Welp, please check me out on both Twitter and youtube! Oh, and review please. ;0P That's the only way I get inspiration, after all. lol I've also made a trailer for the previous chapter "She Came and Left with the Wind". It's called "An Unhealthy Attachment - Harvey's Downfall", and you can find it on my youtube page. :)


	10. Fighting the Demons

**A/N** - I just realized that this is THE first time I've ever attempted to write inside the Joker's head, AKA writing a scene featuring JUST the Joker, so I really hope I do him justice! -nervous- It's like dissecting him all over again...I was actually writing this chapter in my head while brushing my teeth. I swear, inspiration comes at the _strangest_ times. lol But yeah, long story short, the beginning is a dark look into the Joker's past and the reasoning behind a couple of his quirks. Hope ya dig. ;0)

**CH 10: Fighting the Demons **

_'She actually touched them...she said the scars didn't frighten her.'_

The Joker glared back at his reflection and tightened his fist about his tube of face paint, his hands shaking as he hastily unscrewed the cap and squirted the white substance onto his palm. It felt cold to the touch when it landed upon his skin, but to him that was perfect since it matched the cold unfeelingness of his heart.

_'She said the scars weren't what made you a monster...that your soul was what made you the beast you've become.'_

Curling his upper lip into a snarl, the Joker almost defiantly smeared the make-up onto his face with the hopes of drowning out the voice. With each gradual replacement of his flesh with chalk-white, he found that a great sense of relief submersed him with its false sense of security. The irony was that he'd always hated people who hid behind masks and refused to acknowledge the monsters they truly were -- people like his father -- but the moment his true identity had been stolen from him, he'd had no other choice but to create a new name for himself. The grinning creature that greeted him in the mirror each morning wasn't Jack Napier, but something far more frightening, more twisted, and completely bestial...an animal that lived off chaos and a joke that only the criminally insane would understand.

As the Joker smeared his red face paint over one of his scars, he gave a jolt of surprise when he found that the cold, bumpy skin actually hurt. It _hurt,_ and the searing, blinding pain left him half-expecting to find himself recovering in the hospital from his father's attack...that his lips were still stitched shut in an itchy, black-threaded smile.

_'From what I gathered from the police report, his father was a drinker... Damn shame too, 'cause he's just a little kid.'_

_'Do you think the wounds will scar, or that he'll heal completely?'_

_A sigh, deep and laborious drafted up toward the heavens. 'Tough to say right now, so I guess it's an 'only time will tell' situation.'_

Trembling, the Joker gazed back at his half made-up face and began to breathe heavily, his tongue somehow able to taste the cotton and gauze they'd put in his mouth to stop the bleeding. When he'd tried to open his lips to call for his mother, the stitches had strained, bled, and forced him to spend the remainder of his hospitalization in silence. Lying there with the itching, burning pain had been worse than death itself, but when the orderlies had revealed that his mother had passed away, he'd suddenly welcomed the pain. It proved that he was still there...that he was still _alive._ As a young boy, he'd read somewhere that laughter was the best medicine for all ailments, so everytime he was faced with a distressful bit of news during his hospitalization, he'd laugh. Sometimes he'd laugh til he cried, but he had no idea that his actions deeply disturbed his doctors.

_'I think he's gradually drawing into himself...if he doesn't get help now, we may not be able to save him from his own mind.'_

_'Perhaps we can start him on some sort of anti-depressants...seeing as to how he has no legal guardians, the decision is completely ours to make.'_

"Shut _up_-uh" the Joker whispered, his eyes glazing over as he stared back at his reflection in utter contempt. When the voices failed to stop taunting him, he gripped at his greasy hair and screamed at the top of his lungs. "Shut _up!"_ he hollered once again, his voice raw with pain, "Leave me a-_lone!"_

_'Why would I fear you now when I've never feared you before? Your soul is what makes you a monster, Joker, not your scars.'_

With a gutteral roar, the tormented clown prince reeled back before striking the mirror with his fist, the glass shattering into a thousand silver pieces before clattering into the sink in several reflective splinters. Chest heaving, the Joker groaned when he realized that there were now thousands of hollow clowns gazing back at him, his anguish overruling his physical pain as he hurriedly pushed the glass shards into the trash. As he did so, he cut himself across the palm in a thin gash of scarlet, but to him this only brought up his old mantra. _'I'm alive'_ he thought, _'Alive, alive, alive.'_

Taking his wounded hand, the Joker smeared the blood across his lips and scars to complete his facial mask, his eyes hollow and devoid of rational thought as he reached into the medicine cabinet and pulled out a roll of gauze. Wrapping it around his busted knuckles and bleeding palm, he sucked his teeth before glancing over at the cracked clock on the wall. _'Time to blow something up'_ he decided, immediately feeling better at the thought of someone being horribly disfigured by a blast. It'd make them a freak...a freak like _him._ Chuckling darkly, the Joker re-adjusted his green vest before tromping out into the hallway, a grin splitting his lips as he suddenly realized that he wasn't a monster at all...he was just ahead of the curve.

--

"Oh, bloody hell..."

"I figured you wouldn't be pleased" Gordon remarked, his expression remaining stoic as he placed his hands into his pants' pockets. "Those are pictures taken from the MCU security cameras; the Joker came in and broke her out before I could finish interrogating her."

Frowning, Collette re-adjusted her spectacles as she glanced down at Rachel and the clown prince of crime, her head shaking as she inquired, "Do you know what sort of relationship they have? In these images, Miss Dawes appears as if she'd trust him with her own bloody life."

"I can't be sure" Gordon admitted, "but she kept insisting that she was his partner in crime...a Miss Harley Quinn, to be exact."

Collette rolled her eyes. "Well with a name like _that,_ it just further proves that the name Harleen Quinzel is a fake. How long do you suppose it took that masked bugger to figure that one out?"

"Is that a rhetorical question?"

Collette laughed, but it was devoid of all mirth. "Yes love, it was a rhetorical question, but in all seriousness, what do you propose we do about all this? We can't bloody well come out with it in a news report, because that'll have Gotham all in a tizzy."

"Not only that, but Miss Dawes may try to run" Gordon agreed. "The Joker's one sly fox, so if he were to somehow convince her that it was a trap, she'd damn well believe him. He's had her eating out of his palm _this_ long, after all."

"True, true..." Pursing her lips, Collette folded her arms as she glanced down at the floor and scuffed her heels against the tile, her green eyes glittering amidst her thoughts as she suddenly turned to Gordon with a grin. "Love" she cheerily began, "I _think_ I might have an idea..."

--

The skies of Gotham were unusually gray that evening, Rachel clutching at her purse as she hesitantly scaled the steps to St. Bartholomew's. Making sure that the scarf about her head was securely in place, she re-adjusted her sun glasses so she could see over the rims as she clip-clopped against the paved steps. She couldn't quite ascertain why she felt the need to be there, but the guilt-ridden portion of her soul longed for absolution. The remorse was eating at her conscience like an infectious disease, and she knew the only way to truly escape the guilt was to stare her sin straight in the face.

Taking a deep breath, Rachel crossed the threshold and entered the ornately refurbished church, her footsteps growing lighter for fear of being caught as she took a seat in the back pew. Positioned directly before the altar was Miranda's casket, the preacher holding up his hands as he murmured a prayer that sounded remarkably like music.

Craning her neck so she could get a good view of the people around her, Rachel furrowed her brows when she realized that both Harvey and Miranda's husband weren't present. Their mother, Mrs. Angela Dent-Livingston, was sobbing in the front pew alongside her current beau, but aside from the sea of friends and curious civilians, there were no other family members present. Concerned with this realization, Rachel tried to determine why Harvey and Dusty could be missing -- a press conference, perhaps? -- but nothing seemed important enough to drag Miranda's closest loved ones away from her funeral.

Placing his palms together, the preacher closed his eyes before speaking in a commanding voice, "O death, where is thy victory? O death, where is thy sting? Now the sting of death is sin: and the power of sin is the law..."

Suddenly feeling sick to her stomach, Rachel placed a hand over her mouth as she fully absorbed the words of the Biblical passage, her lips quivering as she realized that _she_ was that sting of death. _She _was sin, and it was _she_ who the preacher was ridiculing with his righteous prayers. Trembling from head to foot, it was then that Rachel noticed that her body was overcome by a familiar tingling sensation. At first it started in her finger tips, but then it gradually spread throughout her shivering frame until she felt hopelessly lightheaded.

_'Oh, God'_ she thought, _'I think I'm going to be sick...'_

Covering her mouth with her gloved hand, Rachel hurriedly abandoned her pew and went racing out into the narthex, her shaking form barely reaching the front steps before she turned and retched into the bushes by the bottom stoop. Spitting the tangy bile out of her quivering mouth, Rachel queasily leaned over the step in order to catch her breath.

How could she have let this happen? She'd helped cause so much pain, so much _suffering,_ and now she felt powerless to apprehend the one man who could put an end to the nightmare.

_'I'll talk to him'_ Rachel decided, her wan features grim with determination. _'By this point I have no other choice...'_

_--_

Flames lapped at the apartment complex on 23rd Street like orange tongues, the fevered wail of a siren blaring forlornly in the distance as a lone figure stood amidst the illuminating glow. Gazing up at the blaze with a somnolent look upon his painted face, the Joker didn't so much as giggle as frantic shrieks for help continued to resonate from deep inside the building. What was _wrong_ with him? Why didn't he feel that old, delicious sensation of glee that came strictly with chaos?

Gnawing into the pad of his lower lip, the Joker released a frustrated growl as he felt his hand wrap around something small, smooth, and round inside his pocket. Lifting it up to the light, he gave a derisive snort when he realized it was Rachel Dawes' old pearl, the one thing that constantly reminded him of his only weakness.

On the day of Rachel's alleged accident, the Joker had giddily come to the scene of the crime ready to find his problem finally taken care of. Expecting to uncover Rachel's smoldering corpse, he became slightly disappointed when he discovered a tarnished pearl amidst the rubble, instead. It had glinted in the firelight like a tiger's eye, the soft luster reminding him of the attorney's silken beauty and beckoning to him like a derisive siren's call. The Joker didn't know _why_ he took the damned pearl -- it was really quite stupid when one thought about it -- but he'd felt compelled to place it alongside his knives and lint for safe-keeping. The pearl represented how he'd finally overcome his unhealthy obsession, and with this triumph he wanted a constant reminder to prove that he was stronger than human emotions. Hell, he didn't _have_ true feelings, not even when he was left with the thrill of blood oozing in between his fingers. His emotions were hollow, artificial, and completely devoid of all humanity. The Joker supposed that this was why he hated Rachel Dawes so much, because she'd caused a part of him to awaken that had been lying dormant for so long. The portion of him that'd thawed out was undoubtedly a small chamber of his heart, but fortunately for the clown prince of crime, she'd remained comatose long enough for him to build up a wall of immunity to her revolting vitality and warmth. And yet, if this were actually true, why did he still have the pearl?

Gazing down at the momento in disgust, the Joker curled his lip before leaning back and slinging the jewelry into the flames with all his might. In accordance with this action, an eerie smile painted its way across his vermilion lips, his head tossing back in a delighted cackle as he felt tears of mirth prickling along his lashes. At long last, he was finally able to see the joke in his predicament.

--

Feet crunching through silt and rubble, Harvey emotionlessly trodded across the death site of his beloved Rachel and sister Miranda, his blue eyes bleary as he suddenly stopped and gazed up at the boundless heavens.

"This is where you died" he whispered, his gaze now traveling across the cosmos with a newfound appreciation. "Which star are you, Mandy? The one with the most flair, fire and beauty? Or are you plain and out of sight so you can rest in peace?"

Reaching inside his blazer pocket and running his fingers along cold steel, a wan smile traced his lips as he felt a dull chuckle bubble within his throat. "You're all up there without me" he whispered, his voice now burning with slight resentment. "I once thought I could live solely for my city, but that was before I lost everything to chance. Now that I've discovered how meaningless my life truly is, I've realized that Gotham doesn't need me...not the way that I need you."

Withdrawing his pistol from his blazer, Harvey slowly raised his firearm and pressed the cold metal of the barrel against his temple. Taking a deep breath in through his nostrils, he directed his gaze up toward the heavens and blew a gentle kiss to his loved ones. "May we meet again" he whispered, his finger squeezing back on the trigger until he was rewarded by the deafening release of lead, sulfur, and smoke.

**A/N** - Dun dun dunnnnn, another cliffhangerrr. :-P Unfortunately, I've got a LOT of work to do this week, as well as the next (and most likely the one after that, eheh), so I have NO idea when I'll be able to update again. Hopefully soon, but no promises! And I also hope this wasn't a complete load of crap, 'cause it was kinda blah after I read over it. Oh well, hopefully you liked it anyway!

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

Your Neighbor - Ha, darn tootin', I know where you live! :-P Glad you liked it, but geez, all in one day? I think my eyes would've fallen out... lol

Jia - Aww, well thank you so much! I'm glad you think it was "hot", because I definitely wasn't into that scene at all, haha. I was just like "Insert part A in part B, blah blah blaaah", so I'm glad it turned out alright, hehe. And thanks! I'm glad it was worth the wait, 'cause I know you guys definitely DID wait! ;0P

Sabriel - Yep, 'fraid so. :( I actually really liked writing for Miranda, so I'm glad you seem kinda sad she's gone, because when I mentioned that Mr. J and Rachel were going to do the nasty, she was kind of forgotten. lol

Oh! So you know how they've got those **Batman TDK Fruit Roll-up thingies**? Well, my roomie and I saw them at Wal-mart, and she was like "Oh! I want some of those, 'cause then I can take the Joker in my mouth!" BWUAHAHAHAAAA, finally, somebody more perverted than ME! xD -coughs- Ok, sorry, just wanted to share that. :-D


	11. Angel Eyes

**A/N** - Wooow, I had one heck of a TRIPPY dream a few days ago (yes, I was taking a nap in between classes)...I was talking to Mistah J before he turned into the Joker (I got to 'watch' his transformation, so that was pretty cool), and I had a baby (WHAT!?), and I was like "Why the fudge does my daughter have _facial hair?" _And yeah, for some reason I was getting a lot of flirtatious attention from men because of the baby...guess babies have the same effect on men as dogs do for women? Um, NOT. :-P Thus why this was a dream! And...I can't remember any more. lol

**CH 11: Angel Eyes**

The barium lights were blindingly bright when Harvey opened his eyes, his mouth opening in a silent scream as a dull ache began to throb within his temples. He could tell he'd recently been drugged, for his mind was hazy and unstable as he glanced around him at the medicinal equipment. Tensing his fist as he watched his IV drip from a tube leading to his arm, he grimaced when he realized that he felt..._odd._ Perhaps he'd died, after all?

"Mr. Dent?"

Looking up with a start, Harvey stiffened when a swarthy man in a white lab coat entered the sterilely pristine room, his voice feeling scratchy and hoarse as he choked out, "Wh-who are you? Why am I here?"

Appearing to be momentarily puzzled by this query, the doctor delicately inquired, "You mean you have no honest recollection as to what just transpired?"

Harvey flinched at the memory of the bullet embedding its way into his skull, his hand immediately flying up in order to feel several strips of gauze. "What happened?" he demanded. "Why am I still alive, doctor...?"

"Freeman" the man softly supplied. "I'm Dr. Freeman, and you were found by two necking teenagers. They apparently thought it'd be romantic to go downtown, but when they reached the site of your accident, they found you lying in a pool of blood." Scratching his balding head due to nervous habit, Dr. Freeman anxiously sustained, "Needless to say, they called for help just in time, Mr. Dent. You'd lost a significant amount of blood, and there were several gaping orifices that could've promoted infection."

Harvey frowned. "Gaping orifices? What are you talking about? God, can't you doctors ever just drop your technical mumbo jumbo and say what you _really_ mean?"

"Mr. Dent, I..."

_"Answer_ me, Goddammit!"

Cringing, Dr. Freeman sighed before removing his glasses and massaging the bridge of his nose, his voice rather timid as he wearily returned, "To put it bluntly, sir, there are several holes in the left side of your visage. Apparently the bullet fractured upon impact and broke through multiple portions of your cheek, jowl, and nose. With a bit of facial reconstruction, I'm sure we can rebuild the missing portions of your face."

"No" Harvey argued, his eyes narrowing, "no surgery."

_"What?"_ Appearing to be considerably taken aback, Dr. Freeman urgently insisted, "But sir, if you're worried about the staff's competence, I can full-heartedly assure you that..."

"I _said_ no surgery!"

Stunned by Harvey's passionate objection, the bewildered doctor rose before uneasily agreeing, "W-well alright, Mr. Dent, I'll see what I can do...would you at least like a higher dosage of pain killers?"

Harvey grimaced. "No medicine can cure the pain in my heart, so just go ahead and take me off the morphine. I deserve this pain."

Horrified by his patient's almost sadistic decision, Dr. Freeman nervously adjusted his tie before confessing, "My boss will be _very_ displeased if he's found out that I'm allowing you to mistreat yourself, Mr. Dent, so if you'll just allow me to..."

"Get out!" Harvey snarled, his blue eyes alight with molten fury. When the physician failed to move from his stool, the DA struck the bed with his fist before furiously reiterating, "I _said_ get _out!"_

Wincing, Dr. Freeman staggered up to his feet before mumbling a quick apology, Harvey lowering his gaze to his lap as he listened to his doctor's quick, measured footfalls leaving the room.

Once he knew he was gone, Harvey glanced up at the tiled ceiling and smiled bitterly. _'So'_ he thought, _'I guess I'm finally as two-faced as they claim...'_

Laughing humorlessly at this realization, the DA sank back against his pillow and resigned himself to an unfitful sleep.

--

When Rachel finally returned to her apartment, the black velvets of twilight were gradually unfurling their dark fingers across the horizon. The moon was round and full like a giant quarter, its brilliance illuminating the city and leaving behind an almost calming glow. If Rachel wasn't so riddled with concern at that moment, she might've actually felt at peace for the first time in weeks. She was well aware that she needed to speak with the Joker about a few 'delicate' matters, but the thought of facing him after all they'd been through made her sick to her stomach.

Flicking on the light to her living room, Rachel gave a start when she saw the clown prince of crime sitting in the chair before her, his eyes never leaving the cards he continuously flipped and placed into consecutive rows. Something about seeing the Joker playing solitaire struck a chord in Rachel, her heart palpitating painfully within her breast as she wondered what it must be like to embrace a life of loneliness.

Promptly shaking this rather disheartening thought from her head, Rachel narrowed her eyes and approached the Joker with even, purposeful strides. To her utmost exasperation, he ignored her as he clicked his tongue and swayed from side to side, his eyebrows knitting together as he gazed down at his cards in disgust. "Not good, _not_ good" he muttered, his hand using the butt of his blade to scratch his head, "not good at-_tall_-uh."

Clearing her throat, Rachel irritably placed her hands on her hips and glared down at him while waiting for an acknowledgement. She was sure he knew she was there, so she wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of being the first to break.

After yet another long, awkward pause of silence, the Joker gave a weary sigh before remarking, "Y'know, it's _very_ rude to stare...I have an in-cred-i-bly del-i-cate self-esteem."

"Cut the crap!" Rachel snarled, no longer able to remain silent. "You and I need to talk, so I suggest you finally get serious."

"Oooh, a _talk,_ eh?" Wiggling his eyebrows, the Joker giddily observed, "Well the last time we, uh..._talked,_ we ended up taking a nice lit-tle showerrrr. I'm sorry to disappoint, beautiful, but I'm not ex-act-ly in the mood for bathing right now."

Cheeks red with indignation, Rachel slapped the cards from his hands before having a seat across from him. Never removing her electric gaze from his equally dangerous orbs, she gritted her teeth before snapping, "Look, Joker, I meant what I said...we really _do_ need to talk, because whether you believe me or not, I actually had something very important to tell you that night."

Quirking a brow, the Joker tried to come up with a good joke, but couldn't quite get the words to flow. Pouting due to having the perfect moment for a gag ruined, he demanded with a rather dangerous bite to his tone, "Well what do you _want_-uh? A new suit, perrrhaps? I no-ticed that you got a rip in your, uh..._thigh_ area."

Rachel snorted. "No, I don't need a new suit, and I never will...I'm leaving you, Joker."

_"Leaving_ me?" Bursting into a fit of giggles, he gasped out amidst his laughter, "We're not even _dating,_ honey bunch, but if you really wanna see other people, I guess I'm ok with that."

Rachel frowned deeply. "That's _not_ what I meant, and you know it! After the recent developments of the past few weeks, I've learned that I can't live like this anymore. I can't live, _period_ if I'm going to have to keep helping you murder innocent civilians." Bowing her head, she added lowly, "I'm really sorry, but I...I can't be your partner, anymore."

"Mmm, I seeee...how in-ter-est-ing" the Joker purred, his index fingers steepling together as he leaned back in his seat. "Anything _else_ you'd like to get off that oh-so-curvaceous chest of yours?"

"What?" Balking, Rachel choked, "Y-you mean, I...I can go free?"

The Joker scowled. "Now where on earth did you ever get _that_ impression, beautiful? No" he argued, _"no..._I'm afraid you revoked that pri-vil-ledge the moment you began distancing yourself from the team. I can't have you, uh...running about and squealing on me, now can I?"

"But Joker, I..."

"You tried to betray me" he coolly reminded her. "What's to keep you from doing so again, hmm?"

Biting her lip, Rachel bowed her head in defeat while agreeing, "Look, you're completely right about that, but I only betrayed you because of my conflicting emotions. I can't harm the innocent no matter _how_ much I've come to value your friendship."

The Joker made a face. "Ugh, puh-lease tell me this isn't going to turn into some _girl's_ story on love and de-vo-tion."

"See? There you go!" Rachel irritably accused. "Every time I try to reach out to you, you turn away by making some stupid joke! I want to _help _you, Jack...I want to be the one to help you get past your suffering."

Reaching her hand out to lay it gently across his, Rachel gave a cry when the Joker seized her by the wrist and wrenched her abruptly to her feet.

_"Don't_ call me that" he warned, his dark gaze aflame as he curled his fingers about her windpipe. "You can't just leave things well enough alone, _can_ you? Did you ever think that maybe I _like_ being a fuh-reak?" Narrowing his eyes, he added lowly, "Now get out before I'm forced to do something I re-gret-uh."

"B-but Joker, I..."

"Get _out!"_

Frightened by the rage dancing across his normally collected features, Rachel broke free of his vice-like grip and staggered for the door, tears of frustration burning along her lashes as she heard him knock over a lamp amidst his fury.

When Rachel was finally gone, the Joker slammed his blade deep into the coffee table and tugged at his hair, his teeth gritting tightly as he fumed over Rachel's frustrating mannerisms. He couldn't quite explain it, but at that moment he genuinely wanted to kill her. He wanted to bathe in her blood and relish in her destruction, defeat, and his inevitable triumph. He longed to hear her screams for mercy as he'd cut her to pieces; he couldn't take the compassion she constantly showed him, nor could he understand why he'd allowed it to go on for as long as it had. Perhaps the Joker had actually _liked_ the notion of somebody caring for his well-being, but now that he and Rachel had passed the point of no return, he felt nothing but repugnance for her big, hopeful blue eyes, sweet disposition, and her enormously empathetic heart. Rachel Dawes, he finally decided, was nothing more than a relentless thorn in his side. He needed to dispose of her, and _fast._

--

Abysmal black clouds blocked the moon and shrouded Gotham within its bleak veil, its inhabitants toting around umbrellas and galoshes in preparation for the impending storm.

Rachel found that she could concentrate on nothing but the Joker as she ran, hot, molten tears streaming down her cheeks as she struggled to keep moving. The air burned in her lungs as she gasped for breath, but she forced her limbs to struggle onward for fear of being pursued and caught by _him._ He'd seemed murderous and completely capable of carrying out his threat, so it was with great relish that she found herself heeding his sober warning. As she ran, the sky parted overhead and rained its liquid essence down upon her racing form, her tears mingling with the chilled droplets as the rain thundered heavily against the pavement.

Completely unbeknownst to her, a familiar figure was standing despondently beneath an awning when she quickly ran past. Eyes widening, the slender man abandoned all prior thoughts and began stumbling after her, his hand cupping over his mouthed as he hollered, "Hey! Hey, _wait!"_

Startled by the sudden acknowledgement, Rachel whipped her head around in order to find a tall, gangly man pursuing her at top speed, panic erupting deep within her breast as she forced her enervated form to go faster.

"Please" the man breathlessly entreated, _"please_ wait...I just need to talk to you!"

Promptly ignoring his desperate plea, Rachel rounded a bend and sprinted down a secluded alleyway. Her sneakers splashed through puddles and grime as she ran, but she paid it little mind due to her concentrating solely on her escape. Just when she thought she saw a way out, her toes nicked against the blacktop and she sprawled down toward the sharp pavement. Crying out, Rachel caught herself with her now cut and bruised hands, her palms bleeding lightly as she heard the man's urgent footfalls rapidly approaching her from behind.

Before Rachel could even think to rise to safety, the stranger took her by the elbow and yanked her up against his solid form. As she began squirming about, he soothingly shushed her, his hand lightly running through the length of her hair as he whispered, "Sshh, please just try and relax, Miss Quinzel...I really need to talk to you."

Startled that he knew her name, Rachel whirled around and laid her gaze upon playboy billionaire Bruce Wayne, her mouth falling agape as she spluttered, "W_-what? _I'm sorry, but I don't know you..."

"Well _I _know _you" _he persisted. "I know you probably think I'm crazy, but I've got a hunch about you and the Joker... ...Angel Eyes."

Gasping at the familiarity of the pet name, Rachel barely had time to catch her breath as she woozily fainted into Bruce's awaiting arms, the vigilante's gaze softening as he cradled her still form against his chest.

**A/N** - OMG! So you know how I've made Rachel have a love for Ben & Jerry's? Well, when I was googling pics of Maggie Gyllenhaal for my Jokachel splices, I found a pic of her eating Ben & Jerry's, and I found that to be terribly ironic...and just a TEENSY bit cool. :-P Yay, Rachel DOES love ice cream! lol

And now it's time for me to be a jerk; I feel like people have kinda-sorta stopped reading this, so I'll _ONLY continued when I've reached 300 reviews._ :-P MWUAHAHAHA!! I'm a jerk, like I said! It's just hard to get into the groove when you're writing for hardly anyone, ya know? It's all your fault for spoiling me with my last story! hehe

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOUS

Katie - Wow, thank you so much! That makes me feel really good to know that you cared enough about my OCs to nearly cry! -hugs- And I dunno, IS Mistah J giving in? ;0P We shall see! Thanks so much for reading!

Jia - Goodness, guh-racious, thank you! Well, if you didn't think it was a load of crap like I did, I guess I'll take it, hahaha. And nooo, I didn't kill off Harvey! This is just my interpretation of Two Face. ;0P And here ya go! A little reunion scene for Brucey and Rachel will be in the works as soon as I start it.


	12. What Lies Beneath

**A/N** - Omg, it feels SOOO good to be done with this stupid chapter! I don't know WHAT'S wrong with me, but for the past week or so, I just haven't been able to write anything worth a darn. Hopefully that's not reflected in this chapter! And yeah, be sure to look at my _end author's note_ because I've got some 'splainin' to do since I'm sure most of you will find fault in my ending. Trust me, I know what I'm doing. ;0)

**CH 12: What Lies Beneath**

As Bruce sat diligently at Rachel's bedside, he allowed his worn, calloused hand to caress her cheek as he gazed down upon her sweet face with unabashed affection. Even with the facial reconstruction he could see her true form peeking through, his thumb brushing along the curve of her lips before arching down toward the familiar jut of her chin. God, he knew he'd seen her somewhere before...a man could _never_ forget a pair of starry eyes like Rachel Dawes'.

Needless to say, after Gordon had called him with the news of her alleged survival, Bruce had been in a complete state of shock for nearly six hours, especially since Rachel _-- his_ Rachel -- was supposedly working side-by-side with the notorious Joker, himself. How could she have forgotten her past and, more importantly, her _morals? _Rachel was a woman of virtue, so the thought of her actually assisting a madman like the Joker deeply troubled him. But then...

Bruce frowned. Rachel's mind had been poisoned with some garbage about him having harmed her parents, so perhaps the Joker was merely using her as a pawn to get to him?

_'Well if that's true, it's damn well working'_ Bruce bitterly thought, his eyes narrowing as he balled his hand into a fist. As far as he was concerned, the next time he and the Joker crossed paths, there would be hell to pay.

In accordance with these thoughts, a small moan came from Rachel's rosebud lips, Bruce looking down with a start in order to see her blue eyes resting warily upon him. "W-where am I?" she rasped.

Careful not to embrace her as he so desired, Bruce placed his hand over hers before gently interlocking their fingers, his tone hushed as he assured her, "You're safe now, Harley...you're at Wayne Manor under the best possible care."

Rachel snorted. "What, you mean _yours?"_ Retracting her hand from his fingers as if they were poisonous tentacles, she scowled before haughtily remarking, "I could file a lawsuit about you kiddnapping me, you know. I don't take well to waking up in strangers' beds."

"But I'm not a stranger" Bruce insisted, his eyes reflecting his pain as he wondered if he should get what he wanted to say out in the open. Since Rachel had been supposedly brainwashed into believing the Joker's stories, he was fully aware that he needed to treat the matter with a certain delicateness. Reaching for her hand yet again, he barely noticed her shunt from his touch as he gazed forlornly into her eyes. They were so troubled...so _confused._

"Harley" he smoothly began, "do you remember your doctor from St. Thomas'?"

"Dr. Dandridge? Why yes, I do...I assume she was killed when the Joker rescued me" Rachel admitted.

Trying not to snort at her 'rescue' remark, Bruce leaned forward with his hands folded in his lap, his tongue clicking against his teeth as he confessed, "Well that's not entirely true, Miss Quinzel. Dr. Dandridge is very much alive."

Rachel's eyes widened. "Sh-she _is?"_

"Yes" Bruce solemnly revealed, "and she's actually here right now, waiting for you to wake up. She flew all the way over from London when she found out your true identity."

"What are you talking about?" Rachel demanded, her eyes narrowing. "I already _know_ my true identity, and nothing you or some half-wit doctor say can prove otherwise!"

"Oh really, love?"

Looking up with a start, Rachel blanched when she saw her former doctor enter the room, a clinical smile upon Collette's lips as she re-adjusted her glasses.

"Mr. Wayne is right" she earnestly sustained. "You have been tricked by a mass-murderer into believing that you, too are a crook running from the law. According to several speculative articles, the Joker is nothing more than a troubled individual who preys on fear and insecurity. Despite his high intellect, he views everything as one big game and you, my dear Miss Dawes, are by far no exception."

Rachel balked. "W-what did you just call me?"

"Miss Dawes" Collette reiterated, a hand running through her short, auburn bob as she gave her a hopeful look. "Do you recognize the name?"

Rachel slowly shook her head, yet her curious features were clearly stained with doubt.

Glancing impatiently over at Collette, Bruce suddenly spoke up, "Think harder, Miss Dawes...your true identity lies behind that name." When he was greeted by Rachel's bewildered gaze, he urgently sustained, "Don't you remember us playing together as children, Rach? I gave you a floral pendant, and you threw it in the pond when you found out I had a crush on you...apparently I still had cooties."

Although the story was meant to make Rachel smile, her lips didn't so much as twitch. "I don't know what you're talking about" she dully declared, her eyes narrowing as she returned her gaze to Collette. "Dr. Dandridge, although I highly appreciate your coming out here, I regret to inform you that I have no memories of a 'Miss Dawes', nor do I want to. My name is Harleen Quinzel, and the Joker has been nothing but kind to me during our partnership."

"Then you're in love with him?" Collette inquired, her lips twisting as she carefully observed Rachel's startled reaction. "The Joker is a very charismatic and clever man, Miss Dawes; it's no secret that he tends to get whatever he wants."

Cheeks burning with indignation, Rachel snapped, "No, I am _not_ in love with him, but I fail to see how that's any of your business! He just needs a _friend,_ Dr. Dandridge, and I'm the only one who can help him."

Bruce's expression soured at her words, but he appeared grateful when Collette spoke up, instead. "Miss Dawes, I think you know that's not true" she condescendingly began. "The Joker doesn't depend on his surroundings, which, I'm sorry to say, _include_ his acquaintences. One moment he's an impish, fun-loving clown, and then the next he's a psychopathic murderer. Because of this, I'm led to believe that he doesn't have a genuine personality. Depending on his mood, he actually seems to recreate himself and re-establish his purpose." Now brushing back her loose bangs, she solemnly added, "I don't think he believes that he truly _has_ a purpose, Miss Dawes. This is why he continuously seeks out Batman, death, and destruction...they all help to prove that he's really alive."

Rachel gazed down at the comforter on Bruce's bed in silence, her nails absently grazing the fine silk as she allowed Collette's words to fully sink in. Could the Joker _truly_ be using her, and if so, why? _Why_ would he give her a new identity just so she could be his partnter? Frowning, Rachel hugged herself for support and leaned back against her pillow, her voice soft and full of defeat as she asked, "Well why me, then? Why did the Joker choose _me,_ a former burn victim, above all the other residents of Gotham?"

"Well that's what we were hoping you could tell us" Bruce confessed. "The guy was obsessed with you up until your alleged death, so I was wondering why he'd come to England just to give you a new alias."

The look of jealousy on his face might've been cute, if it weren't for the fact that Rachel was far too bemused to acknowledge him. Looking to Collette for answers, she earnestly revealed, "Well, he _did_ say something about being a man of his word...I can't remember his exact explanation, but he mentioned how he needed to keep his promise."

Bruce snorted. "And since when does that creep keep his word? He's a psychopath, not some saint bent on fulfilling a promise to some woman."

"You speak as if you know him" Rachel coolly observed. "I can assure you that you do _not,_ Mr. Wayne, and from what I've gathered, he's far more of a man than you'll _ever_ be."

Clenching his jaw, Bruce moved to give a biting remark when Collette graciously intervened, her eyes training curiously upon her patient as she asked, "And what exactly has the Joker done to make you feel this way?"

Rachel's cheeks reddened. "How many times do I have to tell you that our relationship is none of your business? If I were in search of a marriage counselor you'd be perfect, but since I'm neither in need of a counselor _or_ a doctor, I'd be very much appreciative if you two would just let me go."

"I'm afraid that won't be possible."

_"What!?_ You can't keep me here!" Moving in order to get out of Bruce's bed, Rachel gave a cry when Collette seized her by the shoulders and forcefully pushed her back under the covers.

"I'm sorry, Miss Dawes, but you've proven to us that you can't be trusted" Collette sternly began. "If you'd just accept the fact that you're _not_ Harley Quinn, we'd know that you were on the road to recovery." Now turning to Bruce, she urged, "Fetch my syringe...it's in the medicine bag by your feet."

Panicking, Rachel shrieked, "B-but I have no memory of being a 'Miss Dawes'...how can you do this to me if I genuinely _don't know_ who that woman was!?" Seeing the syringe in Bruce's hand, she began to thrash about more violently, tears blinding her vision as she sobbed, "Oh God, please just let me go! _Please!_ I swear to you that I'm not lying about all of this...I really _am_ Harleen Quinzel!"

With a sigh, Collette took the syringe from Bruce as he moved to help steady Rachel's flailing limbs, the doctor's voice sickeningly sweet as she insisted, "Trust me, love, this is for your _own_ good."

The sharp, stinging sensation of the needle piercing her flesh made Rachel scream, her body arching as she once more tried to escape from the merciless hands holding her down. After the syrum had entered her bloodstream, she began to feel incredibly faint, both Bruce and Collette's faces doubling and blending together as she watched on in fear.

Promptly turning his back to the heartwrenching spectacle, Bruce closed his eyes as he miserably asked, "And you're _sure_ we're doing the right thing, doctor?"

Collette appeared to be genuinely taken aback. "Well of _course_ I'm sure, love; I should know above anyone else who Rachel Dawes was, and now that we've finally found her again, I'm not _about_ to give up on saving her life!"

Bruce nodded solemnly. "Although I believe you, it all just seems _so_ unethical..."

"But she's sleeping now" Collette insisted. Taking him by the arm, she urged, "Come along, love...while she's in her drug-induced slumber, we can try and figure out how to make her hate that bugger, the Joker."

Although Bruce clearly wished to stay with Rachel, he accepted Collette's offer and began to follow her toward his office. With one last glance at Rachel's sleeping form, he mouthed a pained 'I'm sorry' before guiltily continuing on his way.

--

When Rachel awoke, she discovered that it was well into the evening. If it weren't for the fact that she was in Bruce's bed, she would've chalked her recent memories up as an incredibly bizarre nightmare, but the strange room and the burning itch on her arm were _more_ than enough to prove otherwise.

Amazed that Bruce and Collette hadn't taken the time to secure her to the bed, Rachel eagerly kicked off the covers and went staggering onto the floor. Cursing her shaking limbs, the former DA grabbed her clothes (which were still drying from the rain) and began to tiptoe toward the large entryway leading to God-knows-where.

Just as she thought she'd made it to the staircase undetected, a tall, dark figure suddenly entered the vicinity with what appeared to be a tray.

"Miss Dawes?" the figure inquired, but not unkindly, "What are you doing out of bed? Master Wayne would bloody well murder me if he knew you were up and about catching your death of cold."

Slightly disarmed by the man's kind disposition, Rachel struggled to see amidst the shadows as she curiously asked, "Wh-who _are_ you? I don't believe we've met..."

There was the sound of a weary, disappointed sigh as the man shifted ever-so-slightly, yet his voice turned bright again as he obediently returned, "Alfred Pennyworth, Madame...family friend and devoted butler. I've known you and Master Wayne ever since you both were little children."

Eyes softening, Rachel meekly bowed her head as she confessed, "I don't remember you, Mr. Pennyworth, but somehow...somehow I wish I _did."_ Slowly approaching him, she pressed, "Are Bruce and Collette really telling me the truth? Am I _really_ some woman named Rachel Dawes?"

"I'm afraid I'm not the one who can tell you that, Madame" Alfred sadly returned. Now pointing toward her heart, he softly explained, "Only _you_ can discover who you really are, so if you try and unlock the secrets of your heart, you may one day discover your true identity."

Amazed by his insight, Rachel bowed her head before placing her hand over her so-called heart, her eyes closing as she weakly inquired, "I suppose you're going to sound the alarm and let Bruce know I'm running away?"

"Why no, on the contrary."

Looking up with a start, Rachel could hardly prevent herself from smiling as she demanded, "Well why not? What have I done to deserve such kindness?"

"It's because you're like the daughter I never had" Alfred softly returned, "and to see you happy would in turn make _me_ happy, so I want you to do whatever you feel is right for _you."_ Now turning in the opposite direction, he pointed ahead before explaining, "If you go down those stairs, they'll lead you into the foyer, which is right in front of the double doors leading outside. If you hurry, I can go distract Master Wayne and his guest."

Feeling her eyes tearing up with emotion, Rachel gratefully threw her arms about Alfred's neck before gushing her thanks, the older man feeling tears coming to his eyes in turn as he returned the embrace.

"Quickly now, go on, love" he urged, to which Rachel nodded and immediately obeyed.

As he watched her leave, Alfred sighed before setting the tray onto a nearby table, his heart heavy as he wondered if he truly _was _doing the right thing.

--

By the time Rachel returned to her apartment, her eyes were bloodshot and her make-up was smudged in dark circles beneath her eyes. Her conversation with Alfred had forced her to think about the past few weeks, and she was beginning to truly fear that Bruce and Collette were right. But then again, the Joker always seemed to be there for her during her bleakest hours, so surely that proved _something?_

Wiping at her tear-stained cheeks, Rachel hung her coat up on the rack before entering her bedroom, a shrill shriek escaping her lips the moment a tall, dark figure egressed from the shadows.

"Well gee, I know I'm hid-e-ous-ly deformed and all, but couldja at least tone down the screams?" a soothingly familiar voice mocked, Rachel sighing in relief once her partner stepped into the soft, lambent glow of the moon.

"Joker" she uneasily began, "I-I was actually hoping I'd see you..."

"Oh?" Giving her a sickly grin, the clown prince clasped his hands before asking, "What did you, uh...wish to see me about? Another _chat_, perhaps? The kind with no talking and reckless a-ban-don-ment?"

Rachel felt her cheeks grow hot with his insinuation, but she nonetheless managed to stand tall as she asked, "Why have people been calling me Rachel Dawes? I was kidnapped yesterday evening by some stranger, and my caretakers keep insisting that it's actually _you_ who's the enemy."

Bursting into a fit of delighted giggles, the Joker clapped his hands before eagerly asking, "And did you buh-lieve them?"

"Why no, of course not" Rachel firmly insisted. "Why would I believe them over you, the man who saved my life?"

With a whoop of a laugh, the Joker giddily shook his head before chiding, "Ah, Harley...poor, poor, _foolish_ Harley. You never _were_ one to think with your buh-rain opposed to your heart, now were you?"

Rachel balked. "W-well what do you mean? Are you trying to say that...that they were _right?"_

Sneering at the horrified look on her face, the Joker backed her up against the wall before taking her firmly by the throat, his face now mere inches from hers as he purred, "I don't know _why_ I wanted to call you Harley when your true name is just _so_ or-_gas_-mic. It's like the sound of bone crunching against pavement...the bludgeoning of a skull beneath the butt off a gun. _Raaaaay_chel...by God, do you _hear_ it? All that death and de-struc-tion in one simple name...b-eaut-i-ful, isn't it?"

Shivering, Rachel tried to fend him off, but found that she lacked the gumption as she listened to his story. Bottom lip quivering, she managed to meekly choke out, "W-why did you do this to me? _Why_ am I so important to you?"

The Joker snorted. "Well whoever said you were _important_ to me? I've told you time and time again that I'm fulfilling a promise and nothing more."

"Well a promise for _what?_ Surely you had a reason!" Rachel persisted.

The Joker scowled, but his grip about her throat loosened considerably. "I was going to, uh..._kill_ you" he confessed, "but before you 'died' I told myself that if you survived, we were meant to do this forever."

Rachel balked. "Do _what_ forever? Murder innocent civilians and cause mindless mayhem?"

"Well no, but when you put it that way, it doesn't sound like such a bad idea" the Joker remarked, a grin splitting his lips as he watched Rachel's features darken. "Ya see, you've changed things for me, Miss Dawes, and there's no turning back. I wanted to use you to drive Gotham's white knight off the deep end, and now that he's hospitalized, I'm sure that it's only a mat-ter of time before he snaps com-plete-ly."

Rachel's eyes widened. "But if Harvey didn't snap before I 'died', why would he go crazy now?"

"Because lit-tle Mir-and-uh was his pride and joy, and we squashed her into o-bliv-ion." Grinning at the way Rachel winced at his words, the Joker giggled before tapping her cheek with his gloved fingers. "Ahh, is that com-_passion_ I detect in that charming lit-tle face of yoursss? Really now, Rachel, we need to work on that. If you're going to be my partner, you've got to learn to let go and just _do."_

"But I don't want to work with you anymore" Rachel coolly reminded him. "Although I'm forever indebted to you, you've just proven that you used me as a pawn in your miserable game. You didn't ask me to tag along out of friendship, but for cruel, underhanded purposes. I can't do that, Joker, especially since I believe I was a good person in my former life."

"Sickeningly good" the Joker acknowledged, a grin crossing his lips as he ran his fingers along her chin. "You were ab-so-lute-ly in-corrupt-able, Miss Dawes, and that's what I liked about you. Ya see, there's nothing worth savoring about your day job if you don't face challenges, so that's exactly what I did. I, uh..._chose_ you, I guess you could say, and forced you to play my lit-tle games."

"So when you say that we're meant to do this forever, you're referring to our games?" Rachel asked, her eyes softening as her mind swam with questions. "Are you sure that it's nothing more than that? I-I mean, did we ever...? Um..."

Giving a whoop of a laugh, the Joker gave her a lascivious grin before purring, "Did we ever do _what,_ dollface? Each _other?"_ Bursting into yet another fit of giggles, he dragged his hot tongue along her cheek and nipped at her ear, his swelling arousal grinding against her hips as he growled, "Why yes, we _did,_ beautiful...ev-er-y chance that we got, for that matter."

"No, that's not what I meant" Rachel hissed, her teeth biting into her bottom lip to stifle the soft, breathy moans that longed to escape her throat. "I wanted to know if we...um...ugh, _stop_ that!" Lifting a threatening knee in front of the Joker's groin, she narrowed her eyes before sustaining, "I wanted to know if we were romantically involved."

The Joker gave a whoop of a laugh. "Well why do you ask, dollface? Are you, uh...star-ting to de-velop _feelings_ for meee?"

Feeling her cheeks grow hot, Rachel scowled before snapping, "You're the last man on earth I'd fall for, Joker...I fight against everything you stand for!"

"Mm, sure ya do, honey bunch, but op-po-sites attract, re-mem-ber?" the Joker purred, a black smile unfurling within his soul when he noted the way Rachel's breathing steadily increased. Running his gloved hand along her thigh, he leaned forward before licking her quivering lips, a chuckle escaping his throat as he crashed his mouth forcefully against her own. Predictable as she was, Rachel began to hesitantly respond to his administrations, her tongue gliding over his as she placed her hands against the firmness of his chest and slowly eased them upward.

Wait, what was she _doing?_

Stiffening when Rachel reached for his face, the Joker growled in displeasure as she delicately caressed each of his facial scars, his growls soon turning into strangled whimpers when she brought her lips to his left laceration.

Gently worrying it in between her lips and teeth, Rachel flicked her tongue across the scar before peppering it with nauseatingly sweet kisses. Never in the Joker's life had a woman touched him in such an intimate manner, and he despised the fact that it actually felt _good._ Toes curling when Rachel repeated her administrations to the other scar, he cursed as his heart began to throb with his all too familiar mantra: _Alive Alive Alive._

_'No'_ he furiously thought, _'this isn't how it's supposed to be...'_

Taking her right hand and roughly removing it from his face, the Joker slammed her arm against the wall and reached inside his waistcoat with trembling fingers.

Genuinely surprised by his actions, Rachel watched on with questioning blue eyes until she saw the glimmer of a knife. Oh, God...

"Joker, what are you...?"

Before Rachel could even bring her thought to completion, the Joker took the blade and mercilessly thrust it directly through the thin, delicate flesh and muscle of her right wrist. Screaming from both the shock and agonizing pain, Rachel felt tears forming along her lashes as blood bubbled to the surface of her wound, the excruciating ache throbbing at the point of attack as she watched the Joker turn to make his leave.

"No, don't go" she sobbed, "oh God, _please_ don't go!"

The clown prince gave her an indifferent look, yet there was something else that flickered within the ubiquitous depths of his soul. Pivoting fully around in order to depart from the aggravating woman's presence, he didn't so much as flinch when Rachel called out him for help, her sobs echoing off the walls as she slumped down to the floor in helpless defeat.

**A/N** - Ok, _FACT_ - crucifixions were actually performed through the WRIST, not the hand (the bone structure in the hands are too weak to support a human's body weight), so if you think Rachel would bleed out because of her wound, you're right AND wrong. Let's just say that Mistah J hit her in a "non-vital" part of her wrist. lol

And wow, thank you SO SO SO much for reviewing more so than usual...made me feel loved and appreciated. :) But wow, I STILL took forever and a year, so I apologize for that...just imagine how I long I would've taken if you _hadn't_ reviewed! lol

INDIVIDUAL THANK YOU'S

Rachel - Aww, well thank you so much! :) That's very sweet of you to say!

Sarah - Awww, I am SO sorry for taking forever and a year; hopefully this chapter made up for it! I'm also sorry that your other story that you like to read hasn't updated; I know how that feels. :(

Jia - Ha, you always make me smile. :) You're too kind, for cereal! Well, hopefully this chapter wasn't a let-down for ya, 'cause I feel it kinda sucked. :-S Oops? lol

Savanna - Aww, haha, well you've gotta stop reading SOMETIME or else your eyes will fall out. -lame humor- LoL

snowboardevil - Aww, don't worry, I'd never stop...I owe you guys to at least FINISH, even if the story falls completely apart. Hopefully this was worth it!

I PREDICT THAT THERE WILL BE ABOUT 3 OR 4 MORE CHAPTERS LEFT, SO I HOPE YOU'LL ENJOY! I LOVE YOU GUYS!


	13. Alive

**A/N** - Whew, I FINALLY finished this stupid chapter! And let me tell you, it was veeery difficult because of all the flippin' ANGST! lol Please read my final author's note since I've got a few questions and news for ya. :)

**CH 13: Alive**

When the doorbell chimed hollowly at the front of the manor, Alfred found himself rather unnerved since he had far more important things to attend to than _guests._ The foyer needed swept, the invitations for Master Wayne's dinner party needed to be written, and he _still _hadn't polished the silver from the Duke of York that had been given last winter.

Despite it being well after midnight, Alfred couldn't sleep since he feared Master Wayne would be needing his assistance again. Not long after Rachel's "mysterious" escape, Bruce had taken ill with a high fever, so Alfred had firmly insisted that there would be no masquerading in bat suits that night. Bruce had naturally put up a rousing fight, but once he realized how sick and woozy he _truly_ was, he'd allowed Alfred to send him up to his room to get some sleep.

Re-adjusting his tie, Alfred put on his best 'welcome-but-I-don't-really-want-to-see-you' face before opening the double doors, his pale blue eyes alighting in concern once he saw the figure in the doorway.

"Miss Dawes?" he choked out.

"Alfred" she weakly returned, her knees giving out as she fell into his awaiting arms.

Shifting the poor girl so that he could carry her, Alfredy rushed with her toward the stairs before demanding, "My God, what's happened to you, child? There's blood all over the place!"

_"He_ happened" she returned softly, her features almost appearing lifeless as she pitifully clung to her savior. "I wanted to help him, Alfred, but he ran away from me... He ran away from _us."_

Astonished by this confession, Alfred grunted as he scaled the massive staircase two at a time. "Then you've managed to stir something within that maniac's black soul?"

"It's very doubtful, but a girl can only hope" Rachel mumbled. "I just want him to trust me enough to let me inside his shell...is that so much to ask?"

Choosing not to answer her query, Alfred carried the former attorney into his bedroom (Lord knows he wouldn't be getting any sleep, anyway) and sat her down at the foot of the bed. Now lifting her injured wrist so he could closely examine it, he removed the blood-stained gauze and winced at Rachel's crude stitch job. "No, no, this won't do at all" he decided, his brows furrowing as he got up in search of his first aid kit. He kept it on the dresser since Master Wayne was so frequently getting hurt, so he hurriedly snatched the medium-sized box and brought it over to Rachel's trembling form.

"You're shaking" Alfred observed, his tone colored with concern.

"I'm afraid" she confessed, her eyes shining like sea glass as she held out her arm. "I'm afraid for _him..._he seemed so furious when he left."

Taking her offered appendage, Alfred screwed his lips when it suddenly dawned on him that Rachel never called the Joker by name. Perhaps it pained her to associate him with his horrid pseudonym?

Wiping Rachel's wound with an alcohol-soaked cotton ball, he gently shushed his patient when she gave a pained cry.

Biting back tears at the excruciating burn, Rachel shuddered when she spotted the glint of a needle within the dull lighting from overhead.

Noting her fearful expression, Alfred sympathetically squeezed her hand before assuring her, "Don't worry, love, it won't be so bad...I'm just going to re-stitch certain areas since your prior job was amateurish at best."

Rachel managed a lopsided smirk despite her fatigue. "Well wow, I never thought you could be such a jerk..."

"I get it from Master Wayne" Alfred returned, the two laughing as he threaded the needle and prepared to insert it through her flesh.

--

_'Why would I believe them over you, the man who saved my life?'_

Fingers clenching about the steering wheel to one of his goons' old Honda, the Joker glowered at the glistening streets as the windshield wipers slid the rain back and forth in a continuous dance.

_'You're the last man I'd fall for, Joker...I fight against everything you stand for!'_

With his knife scratching against the surface of his pin-striped pants, the Joker's lips curled into a snarl as he imagined taking said knife and thrusting it through Rachel's chest. It wouldn't slide in like butter or silk, either -- no, it would _crunch_ through flesh, muscle and bone, then cause blood to spill from her delicious lips into his eagerly awaiting mouth. God, he could actually _taste_ it, the imaginary plasma welling within his mouth like liquid copper.

Rachel, he decided, needed to go. He was sick and tired of dealing with her womanly emotions, her constant battle with right versus wrong, and the way she _always_ thought she could fix him. The very notion brought a dark smile to his face, for if Rachel actually thought that she could turn his life around, it proved that it was _she_ who was the crazy one.

Pressing his foot down on the accelerator, the Joker clicked his tongue as he realized that Rachel needed to be disposed of that very night. He couldn't take her presence a moment longer, nor could he deal with the frightening sensations that were beginning to awaken within his breast.

Biting down on his lip so he could relish in the taste of his own blood, the Joker grinned a bloody grin before bursting into a hysterical fit of giggles, for he knew that that very evening would be the end to his madness. With a plan of how to lure Rachel fermenting within his mind, he took a sharp turn and disappeared into the shadows of the night.

--

Staring dully up at the TV screen to his hospital room, Harvey sank back in his pillow and scowled at the images flashing before him. More death, mayhem, and heartache for Gotham that day...what a surprise.

_'It's my fault'_ Harvey realized, his good eye closing in defeat as he angrily clenched his fist. _'My selfishness caused the scum of this city to win, and now...now it's too late.'_

In accordance with these thoughts, an eerily familiar laugh crackled from the TV that caused Harvey to look up with a start. The garishly made-up face of the Joker grinned back at him, the clown prince giving yet another guffaw as he giddily began, "Gooood evening, la-dies and gen-tle-germs! It's me, your neighborhood comedian, ready to give you yet a-noth-er laugh riot." Lips pursing as if in thought, he put on a high-pitched, child-like voice before eagerly asking, "Mrs. Quinzel, can_ Harrrrley_ come out and play today? I've been really, uh_...lonesome_ with this lit-tle detonator here, and I just thought I'd be a _good friend _and let you join in on the fun. Oh! But here's the kicker..." Looking from left to right as if protecting a secret, the Joker cupped his mouth before whispering toward the camera, "If you don't come and play, I'll just try out my new toy without you...on that love-uh-ly hospital for terminally ill children. If anyone comes to Shale Avenue besides Harley, and I mean _any_one, those lit-tle kiddies won't be singing nursery rhymes much longer." Giving a whoop of a laugh at his sick joke, the Joker giddily jumped up and down before asking, "So whaddaya say, toots? Ready for one last _date?_ If you stand me up, I promise that, uh..._you_ will be the one crying."

As the picture faded out to snowy static, Harvey beat his mattress with his clenched fist. Suddenly remembering his earlier thoughts, he realized, _'No...maybe it's _not_ too late. Maybe I can redeem myself to this city by destroying that madman...'_

With this notion driving as his main incentive, Harvey threw back his sheets and went in search of his necessary supplies.

--

Turning the TV off with a shudder, Rachel instantly regretted her decision to tune into the news before bed. Alfred had been kind enough to give her his room, but now that he was nowhere to be found, she felt that she needed his guidance more than ever. It was more than likely a trap of some sort, but Rachel knew that she would never forgive herself if anything happened to those children.

Touching her hip to make sure that her gun was still in place, Rachel gathered up her things before sneaking out into the darkness.

--

Walking down the cold, glittering pavement of Shale Avenue with his large, heavy boots, Harvey placed a clip inside his Glock and smiled grimly at the thought of finally ending his nightmare. A nurse had been kind enough to send for his things, and in return she'd surprisingly only asked that her favorite DA return as soon as possible. Harvey knew he couldn't let people like Nurse Fleming and the rest of Gotham down, but more importantly, he was going to meet the Joker to avenge Miranda...to avenge _Rachel._

The moon hung eerily overhead and illuminated Harvey's path as he walked, his grip tightening about his revolver when he spotted a lone figure looming ahead in the distance.

As the purple-clad phantasm turned around, his lips twisted into a freakish grin that almost seemed to make his eyes turn feral beneath the moonlight.

_"Harrrvey_ Dent-uh" the Joker greeted, a giggle escaping his lips as he turned about with an absurdly childish skip. "My, my, my, what happened to your _face,_ hmm? Get in a fight with a _cheese grater?"_

Abruptly aiming his Glock with the hopes of silencing the Joker's words, Harvey narrowed his eyes while snarling, "I'm here on account of ending your tyranny, Joker, so either we do things my way or the _hard_ way."

"Well, I never _was_ one to go for the easy way out" the Joker admitted with a mocking grin. "If everyone did _that,_ things would be just so..._boring."_

Harvey scowled. "And is that why you killed my sister? Why you killed _Rachel?_ Because any other way would've just been too goddamned _boring!?"_ Firing a warning shot at the Joker's foot, the DA felt his muscles tense when the clown gave an eager whoop.

"Mmm, c'mon, c'mon, I wantcha ta do it, I _wantcha_ ta do it! Use that de-_lic-_ious anger of yours and _fire_ away!" the Joker taunted, his laughter ringing shrilly within the night air as he began hopping back and forth.

"Don't tempt me" Harvey warned, his hand beginning to shake along with the fury building within his breast. As his distrusting gaze followed the Joker's erratic movements, he clicked back the hammer to his Glock and aimed straight at the Joker's heart.

Tickled by the sudden turn of events, the clown prince motioned toward Harvey's pocket before asking, "You, uh...have that lit-tle _coin_ in there, Harvey-cakes? I've got a scheduled meeting with my partner, puh-ret-ty soon, so I'd kinda like to get this show on the road."

"What are you proposing?" Harvey asked, his voice colored with interest.

The Joker rolled his eyes, yet he secretly wasn't bothered by the chance to further antagonize the DA. Licking his lips, the clown prince began to shift from one foot to the other as if deep in thought, a grin stretching his mouth as he purred, "You, uh, re-mem-ber your lit-tle obsession with _chance,_ hmm?" Without granting Harvey the chance to speak, the Joker withdrew his own pistol before clicking back on the hammer. The metallic noise caused the DA to jump, which in turn made the Joker giggle as he slapped his thigh in excitement. "Re-_lax,_ Harvey-boy! I don't buh-lieve in cheating, es-pec-ial-ly if we're going to be _honorable_ and abide by your rules of chance-uh."

Slowly searching his pocket for his lucky coin, Harvey frowned before demanding, "And what exactly are the terms? Heads I shoot, tails _you_ shoot?"

The Joker rolled his eyes. "Oh, Harvey, Harvey, Harvey, that is _so_ buh-_or_-ing. I figured that we could, uh, have a lit-tle game of chance that's like a borderline duel."

"A _duel?"_

"Yeah, ya _deaf?"_ Sniggering at the look on Harvey's face, the Joker giddily sustained, "If it's head, we just start shooting blindly and do whatever the hell we want -- hiding being _per_-fect-ly acceptable, of course -- but if it's _tails,_ we do the good ol'-fashioned ten paces crap. Sound _faaaair?"_

Although Harvey's features clearly still reflected caution, he nodded before unearthing his coin and holding it up for the Joker to see. "Alright" he agreed, "let's get this over with so justice can finally be served."

"Mmm, now _that's_ more like it" the Joker purred, his eyes swimming with eager anticipation as the DA took a deep breath, bowed his head, and flipped the coin. It whistled through the air until Harvey smacked it against his forearm, a grim smile upon his lips as he coolly announced, "Tails...a duel, it is."

"Mm, oh boy, oh boy, oh _boy"_ the Joker enthusiastically returned, his lips twisting into a blood-thirsty sneer as he approached Harvey with light, airy steps. "I, uh...as-_sume_ you know how to duuuel?"

"The whole pistols at dawn thing? Yeah, I've seen a movie or two" Harvey dryly remarked, his own steps heavy and determined as he met his adversary halfway.

Grinning, the Joker turned so that his back was now facing Harvey's, his voice disturbingly animated as he agreed, "Ah, well that just makes things all the easier, hmm? Heck, I'll even letcha count!"

"You're _so_ generous" Harvey snarled, his adrenaline pumping due to being so close to the man he wished to kill. Taking a deep and cleansing breath, the DA heard the Joker crack his neck as he, in turn loosened up, his voice eerily calm as he announced, "Ten paces...don't turn around until I tell you to do so."

"Right-e-o, Harvey-kins" the Joker mockingly acknowledged, an irritating tune whistling past his lips as he twirled his pistol.

Ignoring the urge to shoot him right then and there, Harvey kept his gaze directly before him as he took a shaky step forward. "One...two...three...four..."

"C'mon, c'mon, c'_mon"_ the Joker impatiently interrupted, "I've got a, uh..._date,_ re-mem-berrr? I don't want Harley and her hormones to arrive before we finish!"

"Fine, but _you're_ the one slowing us down!" Harvey peevishly interjected, his limbs shaking with electric fury as he lividly sustained, "Five...six...seven...eight..."

As the countdown continued, Rachel finally found herself at the cross-section for Shale Avenue, her eyes blinking in surprise once she spotted two dark figures looming ahead in the distance. Both had their pistol of choice in hand, the steady, even voice of Gotham's white knight ringing clear as a bell toward Rachel's awaiting ears.

She suddenly gasped, for she was now very aware of the present danger. Oh God, they weren't _really_ going to...?

_"No!"_ she shouted, only to shriek when they both turned around and fired at will.

The twin shots reverberated throughout Rachel's body as if she were trapped in a drum, her hands flying to her heart as Harvey fell down to the pavement like a sack of bricks. The Joker gave a whoop of a laugh in response, yet it was noticeably strained as his own knees buckled out beneath him.

_"Jack!"_ Rachel shouted, her heart pounding in her chest as the cold, prickling sensation of dread trickled throughout her veins. Reaching his prostrate form in record time, she found that he was still giggling, a stream of blood dribbling down his chin as he gave a gut-busting cough.

"Oh, God" Rachel sobbed, her eyes welling up with tears, "oh God, Jack, can you hear me? Does it hurt?"

Training his glassy, shark-like eyes upon her, the Joker grinned before lolling his head to the side and giggling yet again. When she touched his chest he suddenly flinched, his irises glazing over as he began to violently convulse again the asphalt.

"Jack?" Rachel questioned, a streak of panic blitzing across her face, _"Jack!"_

Shuddering and choking on his own blood, the Joker gripped her by the wrist before curling in on himself, his voice growing small and almost child-like as he pleaded, "Don't leave me, Mama...oh, _please _don't die!"

Feeling her heart clench in her chest, Rachel cupped the Joker's cheeks before sobbing, "Jack, snap out of it! It's not your mother, it's me...it's _Rachel!"_

Whimpering like a caged dog, the Joker steadied her hands against his scars and nuzzled into her awaiting palms. His child-like plea for comfort and security made Rachel shudder with confusion, her fingers lightly running along his scars before tracing across his quivering, slightly chapped lips. By now the Joker's eyes were cloudy and unfocused, his skin pale, ashen, and cold to the touch due to loss of blood.

When he gave a sharp intake of breath, Rachel clutched at his hands and tearfully kissed them. "Stay with me" she urged, "come on, I _know_ you can fight this...you're the Joker, for God's sake! It should take a whole lot more than a silly bullet to get you down!"

When the Joker continued to stare blankly ahead amidst his delirium, Rachel quivered before seizing him by the shoulders and giving him a frantic shake full of desperation. "Snap out of it, you asshole! Why are you always so goddamned selfish!?" she screamed, her voice now high-pitched amidst her hysteria. "This is just _so_ typical of you to try and leave me when I need you most! Don't you know I love you? You're infuriating and I hate you more than anything on earth, but God help me, I care for you! I _do!"_

Bursting into tears, Rachel slumped down over the Joker's prostrate form and clung to him like a drowning sailor to a buoy. It felt as if a gun had gone off inside her along with her confession, for the realization that she genuinely loved her partner felt like a slap to the face. How could she possibly love someone so cold? So _unfeeling_? And yet, he was none of these things. To Rachel, the Joker was a world of mystery, intrigue, and twisted beauty, forever luring her into his web like a spider to a poor, foolish butterfly.

Taking the clown prince's cold hand in hers, Rachel caressed it with her thumb and pressed her face against the shallow rising and falling of his chest. His ragged breath was almost painful to listen to, but as her tears absorbed into the cloth of his custom-made shirt, she suddenly felt him place a shaking hand upon her head. The action was so uncharacteristic of him that it made Rachel jump, yet she soon relaxed into his embrace and willingly snuggled up against him.

In accordance with this response, the dark heavens parted and a crystalline veil showered down upon them, the beaded droplets pelting their bodies in a merciless assault that left Rachel covering the Joker with the hopes of keeping him warm.

"Don't leave me" she begged, her hand tightly clutching his, "oh, _please_ don't leave me..."

The Joker didn't answer her desperate plea, his shivering form wilting within her embrace before growing eerily still. Her breath hitching in her throat, Rachel jolted up in order to search his eyes for a hint of life, but when she found none she screamed in agony.

At that very moment, the sound of police sirens interrupted her jumbled thoughts, her eyes and ears completely unresponsive to the slamming car doors until she felt a hand come down on her shoulder.

"Rachel" Gordon apprehensively began, "we're going to have to ask you to come with us."

"No" she whispered, her gaze never straying from the Joker, "I can't leave him."

Gordon bowed his head. "Rachel, he's gone..."

_"NO!"_ she screamed, viciously swatting at the commissioner's invasive appendages as he reached for her. Giving a strangled wail when he finally managed to pull her away from the Joker's body, Rachel reached out desperately to her fallen lover as Gordon continued to drag her toward the awaiting police car.

The last thing Rachel saw before Gordon loaded her into the vehicle was two officers lifting the Joker off the ground, her screams for them to leave him alone falling on deaf ears as they pulled out of the cross-section and into the main street.

--

"Rachel, _please_ just answer me. I know you're in a state of shock right now, but we really need to find out why the Joker and Harvey Dent were dueling" Gordon wearily insisted, a sigh escaping his lips when Rachel stubbornly shook her head.

"No" she argued, "I'm not answering any of your questions until you let me see him."

"But Rachel, he's being held down the hall for Dr. Cobolt to..."

_"Let _me_ see_ him!"

Stunned by the violent fury behind her otherwise docile gaze, Gordon's eyes couldn't help but soften. "Alright" he gently agreed, "I'll give you ten minutes alone with him, but _no_ more than that. Dr. Cobolt wants to study him before the morticians do, so he won't be particularly pleased if he finds out that you've been messing with the body."

Rachel winced at his blunt words. "His name is _Jack,_ Commissioner, and I'm not going to mess with him. He lived every day in complete solitude, so now all I ask is that you let me give him the companionship he lacked in life."

Gordon's features colored with empathy for the young woman before him, so he rose from his seat, took her by the elbow, and solemnly began leading her down the hallway toward the containment room.

"Ten minutes" Gordon warned, but Rachel barely heard him as he turned and left her to her own devices.

Slowly stepping toward the body laid out across the metal table, Rachel took in a quivering breath when she noticed that all of the Joker's make-up had been removed. She knew he didn't like being vulnerable because of his scars, so this simple realization made her cry since she couldn't cover him back up with his war paint. It was back at her apartment with the rest of her belongings, and she wouldn't have enough time to go and get it before Gordon came back.

Now so close to the table that she could touch him, Rachel took the time to study every detail of the Joker's body since in life he never would've allowed this. Running her fingers along the surprisingly soft fabric of his purple pants, Rachel couldn't help but smile when she noticed the diamond-print socks peeking out of his equally custom-made shoes. They were almost elfin since they curved slightly at the toes, but Rachel found that she loved them -- silly ugliness and all -- because they were both an irrevocable part of him.

Now straying her hands up toward the Joker's peculiar green vest and blue honey comb shirt, she winced when her fingers ran along the tear from the bullet that had taken his life. With tears streaming down her cheeks in hot torrents, Rachel found that the Joker looked like a tragic watercolor through her veil of sorrow.

Wiping her eyes with the back of her sleeve, she then took the Joker's cold, pale hand in hers and placed it over her heart. She'd never noticed until that moment how soft and perfect his hands were, but the thought that he'd never again hold her in his arms chilled her soul.

"Oh, Jack" she mournfully whispered, her hot, molten tears dripping down onto his face, "why did you have to leave me?"

When the Joker naturally failed to respond, Rachel wiped the tears from his ice-cold cheeks and kissed his forehead, her lips trailing down over the bridge of his nose before pressing gently against his scarred mouth. Even in death he was well out of her reach, and the thought that she'd never fully gotten to understand him deeply pained her.

Crawling up onto the sterile table so that she could lie beside him, Rachel tearfully wrapped an arm around him before resting her head against his chest. When she couldn't hear or feel the heart that had always exuded so much strength, she closed her eyes and finally gave in to the sorrow that longed to overtake her soul.

**A/N** - ONE MORE CHAPTER LEEEEEEEEEEEEEFT!!!! Oh, and please don't kill me. :P lol I'd been planning this all along, because a relationship such as Jokachel's can only end tragically in my eyes, which is why I'll be trying a new one pretty soon with a completely different angle. And if you thought the whole Joker-morphing-into-his-child-self before his death was weird, I've heard it can happen when someone's undergoing serious bodily trauma. But anywhos, my **new fic** will most likely be called** "Jack's Descent"**, and the first couple chapters will deal with Jack and Rachel's lives before he spirals out of control. So far I'm having a lot of fun with it since they're all goofy and playful, so it's basically more of the style I follow with my original stuff.

QUESTION - Where should I post my stuff? I noticed that there was a TDK section up now (why don't they just mash all the Batman movies together? Guh), but this one still seems to be more popular. Also, I haven't noticed any exceptionally arresting stories over there (no offense to anyone, or anything...I haven't checked it in a while, so maybe that's changed), but do you think I should eventually move these stories over there? I feel like they should since they belong there, but on the other hand, I'm afraid people eventually won't be able to find them because they're in the wrong section. lol

And YES, there _WILL_ be one more chapter...I know it doesn't seem like I can write more, but trust me, I can. ;0) Hope you don't completely hate me! lol


	14. The Measure of Love is Loss

**A/N** - This is it, the end, guys! It's been a long ride, but at least it's been fun! ;0P

**CH 14: The Measure of Love is Loss**

I stood overlooking the ocean with my arms hugging my body for warmth, yet I could feel nothing but the inevitable chill as the waves crashed against the rocks. It had now been two weeks since Jack's death, and I was surprisingly handling it a lot better than I thought I would. Then again, I'd known all along that Jack had wanted to die; I could see it in his eyes, in the way he _smiled._ Every time he spoke of the mysteries of life, I could tell by his tone that he'd like nothing more than to have something come along and destroy him, but he'd never been cowardly enough to end it all on his own.

After Jack's death, I'd started having random mood swings and sick days, but at first I'd naturally chalked it up as stress over the current events of my life. When it persisted, I went to the doctor with the hopes of getting a prescription of some sort, but I was soon informed that I was pregnant. _Pregnant,_ and without a dime to my name. Thankfully I was offered my old job as assistant DA, but I was truly more concerned with what my baby would look like. Now I know that this sounds odd, but the thought of seeing Jack's traits in my future child terrified me -- it still does, for that matter. True, I would love to have something to remember him by other than a jar of ashes, but I just don't know how I could handle him being so close to me, and yet so far. Hell, I didn't even realize how deeply he'd buried his way into my heart until a few weeks ago, so now that a night of passion in my _bathroom,_ of all places, has saddled me up with a child, I honestly don't know what to do.

Alfred has naturally been very supportive of me, but Bruce has kept his distance ever since I made it clear that there was no future for us. It's not like I'm _trying_ to punish myself by ignoring all male affection, but I genuinely don't love Bruce or any other man in the way that I should. I've learned that when they say there's limited room in your heart that it's completely true, because when I realized that I'd loved Jack all along, there was no longer any place in my heart for another man...not even for Harvey (God rest his soul).

I suppose it's obvious (judging by my last statement) that I regained some of my memory, and I'm proud to say that I've remembered enough to turn my life back around. To get even more "in sync" with my true origin, I dyed my hair its original color so I could kiss the life of Harleen Quinzel goodbye. She's a reminder of all the pain I've suffered, of all the pain I've suffered because of _him_, so I know that in the long run I'll be thanking myself for this rather shallow change.

"Rachel?"

Turning to see Alfreed approaching me with Jack's ashes, I smiled fondly at my dear friend before taking the burial urn from his hands.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" he asked, his features reflecting his concern.

I nodded, but my stance went rigid with self-doubt. "I have to" I finally decided. "I've been holding onto his ashes for a week now, and I know Jack would hate being in one place for the rest of his life. If I don't let him go now, I'll...I'll never be able to."

Alfred gave me a sympathetic smile before placing a hand on my shoulder. "Then do it, love, for both of your sakes."

Nodding, I took a deep breath and lifted the lid off the urn, my vision blurring with as I peered down at the ocean from the cliff. The waves were surprisingly calm as they crashed against the rocks, and in a way their unpredictable gentleness reminded me of Jack.

Holding the urn out in front of me as if I were offering it to the sky, I finally turned my wrist and watched Jack's ashes blend into the wind and scatter about in maddening patterns. Somehow the sight caused me to smile my first true smile in months, my hand covering my heart as I whispered the words that had initially brought us together_: "Until we meet again_._"_

**A/N** - Laaaame, but I tried. lol The story's come full circle since the Joker's first lines in chapter one of "An Unhealthy Obsession" was "Until we meet again", so yeah...Rachel said them at the end. Yay. lol I'd envisioned this being far better than it actually is, but that's usually what happens when I wait and wait to write. Oh well, hopefully you liked it, anyway! The title's borrowed from one of the lines from the poet Margaret Gibson's work. :) She's got beautiful poetry, and I hate poetry, so that means something! lol In other news, I FINALLY finished chapter one of my new story **"Jack's Descent"**, so if you're interested, please take a look. :) It's an AU Jokachel/Jackachel set first when they're in college, then after the tragic accident, six years later at Harvey's fundraiser. Alright, I'm done...and not wanting to go to class tomorrow. Bah.


End file.
